If you think the difference between a $15,000 car and an $80,000 car you will never race is $65,000 worth of fun, you do not know what fun is or how to have it. If you are thinking about making such a purchase, buy a cheap car instead and then call me. I will show you how to blow sixty-five grand the right way.
Fifteen cases, and of course it had to be Natural Light.
I’m guessing Natural Light doesn’t get sold in Europe, due to the existence of refunds, so let me tell all you Pond People a little about this stuff. You know how people complain that mainstream American beers are thin and tasteless? Well, Natural Light very literally makes Budweiser taste like bourbon whiskey. And we were left with 15 cases of it in our house– that’s 360 cans of alcohol-flavored water. I’ve managed to whittle it down to nine cases thus far, but my craving for actual beer is strong, and may overwhelm me before this task is through.
Corey is now one of my roommates, along with Brett, Brian, and Al (who has yet to be mentioned in a comic). Our new place is in what’s known as the campus district of Columbus, which is packed full of college students and assorted other people around that age. Of all my roommates, Corey fits into this setting far better than the rest of us. Activities such as drinking games, house parties, and sex with girls who bought this hat because Britney Spears wore a hat just like it in a music video are his fortes.
Corey and skanks– they go together like peanut butter and K-Y jelly.
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If you’ve never worked a twelve-hour night shift before, let me tell you that it is awful. And for the last several hours, there is only one thing on your mind– one thing that drowns out all of your other thoughts– murder.
Picture this: you’re coughing all day long, so hard that it’s straining the muscles in your back. You’re also moving heavy boxes. And pretty much the rest of you feels like total hell for one reason or another too. That’s been my last week. Fun.
Last night, I was walking to the kitchen to get something to eat, and my back started aching so bad I couldn’t stay standing. I had to ask Brett to help me up so I wouldn’t be lying on the floor all night. That shit is embarrasing.
I feel a little better today, but if you were wondering why I couldn’t put anything up for the past few days, that’s why. Anyway, I should be able to get this show back on schedule from here on. Finally.