`Well, not as such,' Vimes conceded. `They'll try to attack the other bunch, and we're in the way.'

`They won't go around us, perhaps?' said A. E. Pessimal hopefully.

`I doubt it. They won't be in the mood for narrow alleys. They'll be thinking in straight lines. Charge and yell, they'll say, that's the way.'

`Ah, there's the university over there!' said A. E. Pessimal, as if noticing the huge bulk of Unseen University for the very first time. `Surely the wizards could-'

-magic their weapons out of their hands, possibly leaving them with all their fingers? Magic them into the cells? Turn them all into ferrets? And what then, Mr Pessimal?' Vimes lit a cigar, cupping the match in his hand so that the flame made his face glow briefly. `Shall we follow where magic leads us? Wave a wand, eh, to find out who's guilty, and what of? Magic men good? The innocent would have nothing to fear, d'you think? I wouldn't bet tuppence, Mr Pessimal. Magic's a little bit alive, a little bit tricky. Just when you think you've got it by the throat it bites you in the arse. No magic in my Watch, Mr Pessimal. We use good old-fashioned policing.'

`But there are lots of them, commander.'

`About a thousand altogether, I reckon,' said Vimes placidly. `Plus

who knows how many more out there who'll whale in if we let it get out of hand. This is just the hotheads and the gangs right now.'

`B-but can't you just, er, leave them to it?

'No, Mr Pessimal, because that'd be what we in the Watch call "complete and utter bloody chaos" and it will not stop, and it will get bigger very quickly. We have to finish it right now, so-'

There was a thud from the direction of the plaza. It was loud enough to echo around the buildings.

`What was that?' A. E. Pessimal said, looking around hurriedly.

`Oh, that was to be expected,' said Vimes.

Pessimal relaxed very slightly. `It was?'

`Yes, it's the gahanka, the troll war beat,' said Vimes. `They say that within ten minutes of hearing it, you're dead.' Behind Pessimal, Detritus grinned, the torchlight turning his diamond teeth into rubies.

`Is that true?'

`I shouldn't think so,' said Vimes. `And now please excuse me for a while, Acting-Constable Pessimal. I'll leave you in the good hands of Sergeant Detritus while I talk to my men. Stiffen their sinews, that sort of thing.'

He moved away quickly. He told himself he shouldn't be doing this to the inspector, who was just a clerk in the wrong place and probably wasn't a bad man. The trouble was, the trolls up in the plaza probably weren't bad trolls, and the dwarfs down in the square probably weren't bad dwarfs, either. People who probably weren't bad could kill you.

The troll beat boomed around the city as Vimes reached Fred Colon.

`I see they're giving us the of gahanka then, Mister Vimes,' said the sergeant, with nervous cheerfulness.

`Yep. They'll be charging pretty soon, I expect: Vimes screwed up his eyes, trying to see figures around the distant glow. Trolls didn't charge fast, but when they charged it was like a wall getting nearer.

Extending a hand and shouting `Halt!' in a firm, authoritative voice probably would not be sufficient.

`You thinking about another barricade, Mister Vimes?' said Fred. 'Hmm?' said Vimes, dismissing the mental picture of himself laminated to the street.

`Barricades, sir,' Colon prompted. 'More'n thirty years ago?'

Vimes gave a curt nod. Oh yes, he remembered the Glorious Revolution. It hadn't really been a revolution and had been glorious only if you thought an early grave was glorious. Men had died there, too, because of other men who, bar one or two, probably weren't bad ...

`Yes,' he said. `And it seems like only yesterday.' Every day, he thought, it seems like only yesterday.

`Remember of Sergeant Keel? He pulled off a few tricks that night!' Sergeant Colon's voice, like A. E. Pessimal's, had a curiously hopeful tone.

Vimes nodded.

`I suppose you wouldn't have one or two up your sleeve too, sir?' Fred went on, the hope now naked and unashamed.

`You know me, Fred, always willing to learn,' said Vimes vaguely. He strolled on, nodding to watchmen he knew, slapping others on the back, and trying not to get trapped in anyone's gaze. Every face was in some way a reflection of the face of Fred Colon. He could practically see their thoughts, while the thud of five hundred clubs hitting the stone in unison banged on the eardrums like a hammer.

You have got it sorted, haven't you, Mister Vimes? We're not really going to be stuck here like the meat in a sandwich, right? It's a trick, yes? It is a trick, isn't it? Sir?

I hope it is, Vimes thought. But, one way or another, the Watch has to be here. That's the bloody truth of it.

Something had changed in the rhythm of the gahanka. You had to be listening, but some of the clubs were hitting the ground just ahead or just after the beat. Ah.

He reached Cheery and Carrot, who were staring at the distant

fires of the dwarfs.

`We think we might be getting a result, sir,' said Carrot.

`I damn well hope so! What's happening with the dwarfs?' `Not so much singing, sir,' Cheery reported. `Glad to hear it.'

`We could handle them, though, couldn't we, sir?' said Carrot.

`With the golem officers on our side too? If it came to it?'

Of course we couldn't, Vimes's mind supplied, not if they mean

it. What we could do is die valiantly. I've seen men die valiantly.

There's no future in it.

`I don't want it to come to it, captain-' Vimes stopped. A deeper

shadow had moved amongst the shadows.

`What's the password?' he said quickly.

The shadowy figure, who was cloaked and hooded, hesitated. `Pathword? Ecthcuthe me, I've got it written down thome

where-' it began.

`Okay, Igor, come on in,' said Carrot.

`How did you know it wath me, thur?' said Igor, ducking under

the barricade.

`Your aftershave' said Vimes, winking at the captain. `How did it go?' Jutht ath you thaid, thur,' said Igor, pushing his hood back.

'Inthidentally, thur, I have thcrubbed the thlab well and my couthin

Igor ith thtanding by to lend a hand. In cathe of any little

acthidenth, thur. ...'

`Thank you for thinking of that, Igor,' said Vimes, as if Igors ever

thought of anything else. `I hope it won't be needed.'

He looked up and down the Chain. The rain was falling

harder now. Just for once, the copper's friend had turned up when

he really needed it. Rain tended to dampen martial enthusiasm. `Anyone seen Nobby?' he said.

A voice from the shadows said: `Here, Mister Vimes! Been here

five minutes!'

`Why didn't you sing out, then?'

`Couldn't remember the password, sir! I thought I'd wait till I heard Igor say it!'

`Oh, come on in. Did it work?'

'Better'n you'd imagine, sir!' said Nobby, rain pouring down his cloak.

Vimes stood back. `Okay, lads, then this is it. Carrot and Cheery, you head for the dwarfs, me and Detritus will take the trolls. You know the drill. Lines to advance slowly, and no edged weapons. I repeat, no edged weapons until it's that or die. Let's do this like coppers, okay? On the signal!'

He hurried back up the line of barricades as fast as the stir ran along the ranks of the watchmen. Detritus was waiting stoically. He grunted when Vimes arrived.

`Clubs have jus' about stopped, sir,' he reported.

`I heard, sergeant.' Vimes took off his oiled leather cloak and

hung it on the barricade. He needed his arms free.

`By the way, how did it go in Turn Again Lane?' he said, stretch

ing and breathing deeply.

`Oh, wonnerful, sir,' said Detritus happily. `Six alchemists an' fifty pound o' fresh Slide. In an' out, quick an' sweet, all banged up in the Tanty.'