e27
Clue
CLUE
--Transcript--
This is the transcript for CLUE, the 1985 movie
based on the Parker Brothers board game of the same name. This
movie, though not a critical success, holds a special place in
many hearts. It stars Tim Curry, Martin Mull, Madeline Kahn,
Michael McKean, Lesley Ann Warren, Christopher Lloyd, and Eileen
Brennan. The screenplay was written by Jonathan Lynn, from a story
by John Landis and Jonathan Lynn. The movie was directed by
Jonathan Lynn.
Note: this transcript is based on the videotape
version, which includes all three endings--A, B, and C.
The opening credits appear over a sky,
growing stormy.
1 -- EXT. WADSWORTH'S CAR--TWILIGHT -- 1
WADSWORTH's car
travels through the wind of an oncoming storm.
It pulls up to the gate of
Hill House.
Hill House is a large, imposing mansion, looking very New
England.
Wadsworth takes out a key and unlocks the gate.
He drives the car
up to the front door.
2 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT DOOR -- 2
Wadsworth
exits the car, holding a bag and looking at the two barking guard
dogs.
The dogs approach Wadsworth . . . then jump.
Wadsworth quickly pulls a big beef bone out of the bag and hurls it to them.
The dogs trot away to gnaw on the bone as Wadsworth rolls up the bag.
Wadsworth cinches their chain so it won't allow them to reach the door.
He steps toward the door . . . and sniffs.
Wadsworth pauses and checks the bottom of his feet. Dog crap.
He looks in disgust at the dogs, who aren't bothered at all.
3 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 3
The Hall of Hill House is remarkable,
elegant but not gaudy.
It is furnished in dark wood, and brass, with
crystal chandeliers.
There are several doors on each side of the hall and
three at the end.
To the left: Lounge and dining room.
To the right: Study,
library, and billiard room.
The end: Conservatory, ball room, bathroom, and
kitchen.
The stairs are located to the right.
By the staircase is the door
to the basement steps.
We hear "Shake, Rattle, and Roll" in the
background.
Wadsworth opens the front door of Hill House and wipes off his
foot.
He enters and hangs up his coat.
SUPERIMPOSED: NEW ENGLAND
1954
Wadsworth steps briskly down the Hall steps
toward the library.
4 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 4
The library is
a somewhat more comfortable room than the hall,
composed of dark colors.
All of the walls are covered with books,
with the exception of one wall, a
window.
YVETTE, a young and rather jiggly french maid, is polishing a
glass.
The music is much louder.
Wadsworth enters and turns off the record
player. The music stops.
He speaks to the maid in a proper English
accent.
WADSWORTH
Is everything ready?
She replies in a French
accent.
YVETTE
Oui, monsieur.
WADSWORTH
You have your
instructions?
Yvette nods.
Wadsworth exits.
Yvette sniffs the air, and
then examines the bottom of her shoes.
5 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN --
5
The kitchen is white tile, narrow. There is a meat freezer to the
right.
A counter leads off to the left.
MRS. HO, the cook, is sharpening a
knife.
Joseph McCarthy is speaking on the television in the
background.
Wadsworth enters.
WADSWORTH
Is everything all right, Mrs.
Ho?
She turns, knife in hand.
MRS. HO
Dinner will be rea
190
dy at
seven-thirty.
The doorbell rings.
Wadsworth exits the kitchen.
6 --
EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT DOOR--NIGHT -- 6
A man is standing by the front
door, being growled at by the dogs.
He is not comfortable.
7 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 7
Wadsworth opens the door.
WADSWORTH
Good
evening.
MAN
Good evening. I don't know if--
WADSWORTH
Yes, indeed, sir,
you
fa0
are expected, Colonel.
May I take your coat? It is Colonel Mustard,
isn't it?
MUSTARD
No, that's not my name. My name is
Colonel--
WADSWORTH
Pardon me, sir, but tonight you may well feel obliged
to my employer
for the use of an alias.
Mustard sniffs around and checks
his shoe as Wadsworth hangs his coat.
The pair starts across the
hall.
MUSTARD
And who are you, sir?
WADSWORTH
I'm Wadsworth, sir. The
butler.
8 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 8
Yvette is
present.
WADSWORTH
Yvette, will you attend to the Colonel and give him
anything he requires.
(glances at them)
Within reason, that is.
Wadsworth
exits, closing the doors behind him. The doors have books
on the back of
them, and so look like a part of the wall.
MUSTARD
Oh, Wadsworth, I
was--
Mustard turns to discover the doors have disappeared.
The bell
rings.
9 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT DOOR -- 9
A woman dressed in black
stands here.
Wadsworth opens the door.
10 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL
-- 10
WADSWORTH
Do come in, madam. You are expected.
WOMAN
Do you know
who I am?
WADSWORTH
Only that you are to be known as Mrs.
White.
WHITE
Yes, it said so in the letter. But, why . . . ?
Wadsworth
removes her coat, with a brilliantly white inside.
Mrs. White sniffs and
checks her shoe.
11 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 11
Yvette and Col.
Mustard are here.
Mustard is sipping Cognac and glancing at Yvette.
The
doors open, the left one into Col. Mustard.
WADSWORTH
Ah. May I introduce
you? Mrs. White, this is Yvette, the maid.
(The two women react with
disgust)
I see you know each other.
Mrs. White turns away as Col. Mustard
emerges from behind the door.
WHITE
Hello.
MUSTARD
Hello.
12 -- EXT.
ROADSIDE -- 12
A slim woman is standing by her broken down car.
An owl can
be heard.
She hits the car, obviously frustrated.
Thunder roars in the
distance.
The woman sees headlights a short way away. She smoothes her
dress.
As the car nears, she bends over the engine and lifts a leg.
the car
screeches to a halt just past her and backs up.
The woman goes to the car
and peers in.
MAN'S VOICE
Want a lift?
WOMAN
(sultry)
Yes, please . .
.
She gets in.
13 -- INT. MAN'S CAR -- 13
WOMAN
Thanks. I'm late for a
dinner date.
MAN
Me too. Where are you going?
The woman pulls out a sheet
of paper.
WOMAN
(looking at paper)
Let's see . . . Hill House. Off Route
41.
MAN
Wait a minute. Let me look at that.
(takes paper)
That's where I'm
going. I got a letter like this.
They both look disturbed.
14 -- EXT.
CAR -- 14
The rain has started.
The windshield wipers start as the car
pulls away.
15 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 15
We see a middle aged
woman.
WADSWORTH (O.S.)
And this is Mrs. Peacock.
MUSTARD
How do you
do?
WHITE
Hello.
WADSWORTH
Yvette, will you go and check that dinner will
be ready as soon
as all the guests have arrived?
Yvette nods.
Mrs. Peacock
stares disapprovingly at Yvette's exposed cleavage.
Yvette exits the
library.
The doorbell rings.
16 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT DOOR -- 16
It
is now raining quite hard.
A man is standing at the door, much like Col.
Mustard was.
The dogs, of course, are growling.
Wadsworth opens the
door.
MAN
Is this the right address to meet Mr. Boddy?
WADSWORTH
Oh, you
must be Mr. Green.
GREEN
Yes . . .
WADSWORTH
(to dogs)
Sit!
Green
frantically sits on a bench by the door.
WADSWORTH
No. Not you, sir.
Mr.
Green sheepishly gets up and enters the house.
17 -- INT. MAN'S CAR --
17
WOMAN
It should be just off there.
17a -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--VIEW FROM
FRONT GATE -- 17a
17b -- INT. MAN'S CAR -- 17b
MAN
That must be
it.
17c -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--VIEW FROM FRONT GATE -- 17c
Lightning
crashes, illuminating the house.
17d -- INT. MAN'S CAR -- 17d
WOMA
190
N
Why
is the car stopped?
MAN
It's frightened.
17e -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT
GATE -- 17e
The car is started again and it rolls up the driveway.
18 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 18
Lightning crashes, making Mr. Green
gulp.
19 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT--DRIVEWAY -- 19
The man and woman
exit their car and run for the front door.
The man shields the woman from
th
fa0
e now heavy rain.
MAN
What a godforsaken place!
He squeezes one of the
woman's buttocks.
She shakes his hand off, looking disgusted.
The door
opens, revealing Wadsworth.
WADSWORTH
Professor Plum! And Miss Scarlet. I
didn't realize you were acquainted.
SCARLET
(glancing at Plum)
We
weren't.
They enter.
20 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 20
The doors
open to reveal Prof. Plum and Miss Scarlet.
WADSWORTH
May I present
Professor Plum . . . and Miss Scarlet.
Nods all around.
Plum and Scarlet
receive wine glasses from Yvette, whom Plum eyes.
Prof. Plum clinks glasses
with Miss Scarlet, who looks annoyed.
WADSWORTH
Of course, since you've
each been addressed by a pseudonym,
you'll have realized that nobody here
is being addressed by their real name.
The guests glance around
suspiciously.
21 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 21
Mrs. Ho bangs a
bong once, fiercely.
22 -- INT. LIBRARY -- 22
The gong is heard a second
time.
Mr. Green jumps at the sound, dumping his champagne on Mr.
Peacock.
WADSWORTH
(calmly, as always)
Ah. Dinner.
GREEN
(hands Peacock
his glass, starts to mop her up as she clucks)
I'm sorry . . . I'm a little
accident-prone . . .
23 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 23
The guests
cross to the Dining Room.
24 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM -- 24
The
dining room is elegant, in similar decor to the Hall, but it is
somewhat
more comfortable.
However, the room is still small.
At one end, there is a
door and a metal partition, both leading to the kitchen.
The guests file
in.
WADSWORTH
You'll find your names beside your places. Please be
seated.
The guests, except for Col. Mustard, find their places and
sit.
Wadsworth sets Miss Scarlet's drink on the table, to her
pleasure.
MUSTARD
(indicating the head of the table)
Is this place for
you?
WADSWORTH
Oh, indeed, no, sir. I'm merely a humble
butler.
MUSTARD
And what exactly do you do?
WADSWORTH
I buttle,
sir.
MUSTARD
Which means what?
WADSWORTH
The butler is head of the
kitchen and dining room.
I keep everything . . . tidy. That's all.
Col.
Mustard attempts to continue but is interrupted by Mrs.
Peacock.
PEACOCK
Well, what's all this about, butler; this dinner
party?
WADSWORTH
"Ours is not to reason why . . . Ours is but to do and
die"
PLUM
"Die"?
WADSWORTH
(smiling)
Merely quoting, sir, from Alfred,
Lord Tennyson.
MUSTARD
(now seated next to Miss Scarlet)
Hm. I prefer
Kipling, myself.
"The female of the species is more deadly than the
male."
(to Scarlet)
You like Kipling, Miss Scarlet?
SCARLET
Sure, I'll eat
anything.
Yvette enters carrying a tray.
YVETTE
(to Peacock)
Sharks' Fin
Soup, Madame.
MUSTARD
(again indicating head)
So is this for our
host?
WADSWORTH
No, sir. For the seventh guest, Mr. Boddy.
WHITE
I
thought Mr. Boddy was our host?
The guests all concur.
WHITE
So who is
our host, Mr. Wadsworth?
Wadsworth chuckles with a closed
smile.
PLUM
Well, I want to start, while it's still hot.
PEACOCK
Oh, now
shouldn't we wait for the other guest?
YVETTE
I will keep somesing warm
for eem.
SCARLET
What did you have in mind, dear?
Silence.
Prof. Plum
slurps soup from his spoon.
Mrs. White disapproves, then does the
same.
Mustard, Scarlet, and Green stare at them, spoons poised near
mouths.
They do it again.
Silence.
PEACOCK
(breathlessly)
Well, someone's
got to break the ice, and it might as well be me.
I mean, I'm used to being
a hostess; it's part of my husband's work,
and it's always difficult when a
group of new friends meet together
for the first time to get acquainted, so
I'm perfectly prepared to start
the ball rolling . . . I mean, I have
absolutely no idea what we're doing
here, or what I'm doing here, or what
this place is about, but I am
determined to enjoy myself and I'm very
intrigue
190
d and oh, my, this
soup's delicious isn't it?
Everyone sits
bewildered.
WHITE
You say you are used to being a hostess as part of your
husband's work?
PEACOCK
Yes, it's an integral part of your life when you
are the wife of a. . .
oh, but then I forgot we're not supposed to say who
we really are,
though heavens to Betsy, I don't know why.
MUSTARD
Don't
you.
GREEN
I know w
fa0
ho you are.
SCARLET
Aren't you going to tell
us?
PEACOCK
(removes glasses nervously)
How do you know who I am?
GREEN
I
work in Washington, too.
PLUM
Oh, so you're a politician's
wife.
PEACOCK
Yes, I-I am.
MUSTARD
Well, come on, then. Who's your
husband?
Suddenly, Wadsworth opens the door from the kitchen.
PEACOCK
(to
Mrs. White)
So, what does your husband do?
WHITE
(almost cutting her
off)
Nothing.
PEACOCK
Nothing?
WHITE
Well, he . . . just . . . lies
around on his back all day.
SCARLET
Sounds like hard work to me.
Yvette,
in the kitchen, opens the partition suddenly.
The noise coincides with a
crash of thunder.
Mr. Green, jumpy as ever, spills his drink again, this
time on Miss Scarlet.
GREEN
I'm . . . sorry. I'm afraid I'm a little
accident-prone.
He starts to wipe off her upper chest.
SCARLET
Ah--watch
it.
He stops.
Yvette starts serving food.
YVETTE
Excuse moi.
The guests
start eating.
PEACOCK
Mmm! This is one of my favorite
recipes!
WADSWORTH
I know, madam.
PEACOCK
So, what do you do in
Washington, D.C., Mr. Green?
No answer.
PEACOCK
Come on, what do you do?
I mean, how are we to get
acquainted if we don't say anything about
ourselves?
SCARLET
(angrily)
Perhaps he doesn't want to get acquainted
with you.
PEACOCK
(bothered)
Well, I'm sure I don't know, but if I wasn't
trying to keep the conversation
going, then we would just be sitting here
in an embarrassed silence.
PLUM
Are you afraid of silence, Mrs.
Peacock?
PEACOCK
Yes! What? No, why?
PLUM
Oh, it just seems to me that
you seem to suffer from
what we call pressure of speech.
SCARLET
"We"?
Who's "we"? Are you a shrink?
PLUM
I do know a little bit about
psychological medicine, yes.
WHITE
Are you a doctor?
PLUM
I am, but I
don't practice.
SCARLET
Practice makes perfect. Ha. I think most men need
a little
practice, don't you, Mrs. Peacock?
Mrs. Peacock shrugs, very
uncomfortable.
WHITE
So what do you do, Professor?
PLUM
I work for UNO,
the United Nations Organization.
MUSTARD
Another politician.
Jesus!
PLUM
No, I work for a branch of UNO. W.H.O., the World Health
Organization.
PEACOCK
Well, what is your area of special
concern?
PLUM
Family planning.
(to Mustard)
What about you, Colonel? Are
you a real colonel?
MUSTARD
(seriously)
I am, sir.
SCARLET
You're not
going to mention the coincidence that you also live in
Washington,
D.C.?
MUSTARD
How did you know that? Have we met before?
SCARLET
I've
certainly seen you before. Although you may not have seen me.
GREEN
So,
Miss Scarlet, does this mean that you live in Washington,
too?
SCARLET
Sure do.
PEACOCK
Does anyone here not live in Washington,
D.C.?
PLUM
I don't.
GREEN
Yes, but you work for the United
Nations.
That's a government job. And the rest of us all live in a
government town.
Anyone here not earn their living from the government in
one way or another?
Col. Mustard stands suddenly.
MUSTARD
(angrily, to
Wadsworth)
Wadsworth, where's our host, and why have we been brought
here?
The doorbell rings.
Wadsworth exits.
We hear the door opening and
Wadsworth speaks.
WADSWORTH (O.S.)
Ah! Good evening. You are eagerly
awaited.
MAN (O.S.)
You lockin' me in?
I'll take the key.
WADSWORTH
(O.S.)
Over my dead body, sir.
May I take your bag?
MAN (O.S.)
No. I'll
leave it here 'til I need it.
WADSWORTH (O.S.)
It contains evidence, I
presume?
MAN (O.S.)
Surprises, my friend. That's what it
contains--surprises!
Wadsworth enters the dining room, followed by the
man.
WADSWORTH
Ladies and gentlemen, may I present Mr. Boddy.
BODDY
What
are they all doin' here?
WADSWORTH
Eating dinner. Do sit down, Mr.
Boddy.
BODDY
(sitting)
Thanks.
Yvette starts to serve him
BODDY
Nah, you
can take that away, honey.
Mrs. Pea
190
cock hits the
table.
PEACOCK
(angrily)
Look. I demand to know what's going on. Now why
have
we all been dragged up to this horrible place?
WADSWORTH
Well. I
believe we all received a letter. My letter says,
"It will be to your
advantage to be present on this date because
a Mr. Boddy will bring to an
end a certain long-standing confidential
and painful financial
liability."
It i
fa0
s signed, "A friend."
GREEN
I received a similar
letter.
SCARLET
So did we, didn't we. (indicating Prof. Plum)
BODDY
I
also received a letter.
(Yvette starts to serve him again)
No thanks,
Yvette.I just ate.
GREEN
Now, how did you know her name?
BODDY
We know
each other.
(puts his hand up Yvette's (short) skirt)
Don't we, dear?
She
recoils.
WADSWORTH
Forgive my curiosity, Mr. Boddy, but did your letter
say the same thing?
BODDY
No.
WADSWORTH
I see . . .
(to group)
Can I
interest any of you in fruit or dessert?
No response.
WADSWORTH
In that
case, may I suggest we adjourn to the study
for coffee and brandy, at which
point I believe our unknown host
will reveal his intentions.
25 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 25
The study is by far the most comfortable
room we've seen so far.
It is decorated in subdued tan colors.
There are
several couches, a bookshelf, a table with drinks, and a desk.
The guests
enter and look around for their host.
GREEN
Well, there's no one
here.
WADSWORTH
(to the guests in general)
Please help yourself to brandy
and be seated.
Wadsworth goes to the desk and takes a manilla envelope.
It
reads For Wadsworth
Open AFTER DINNER
SCARLET
Mind if I
smoke?
Prof. Plum, seated next to Miss Scarlet, lights her
cigarette.
Wadsworth opens the envelope.
He peruses the
contents.
WADSWORTH
Ladies and gentlemen, I'm instructed to you what you
all have
in common with each other.
Unless you would care to do the honors,
Mr. Boddy?
BODDY
Why me? They know who I am?
WADSWORTH
I don't think
so.
You've never identified yourself to them, I believe.
Mr. Boddy stands
suddenly.
BODDY
It's a hoax! I suggest we all leave.
He takes off out the
study door.
WADSWORTH
(in pursuit)
I'm sorry, sir, you cannot leave this
house!
26 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 26
Mr. Boddy goes to the
front door.
Wadsworth follows, and he is followed by the other
guests.
BODDY
No? Who's gonna stop me?
WADSWORTH
There's no way out.
(Mr.
Boddy tries the front door. It's locked.)
All the windows have bars, all
the doors are locked.
BODDY
This is an outrage! You can't hold us
prisoner!
The guests, in confusion, agree.
WADSWORTH
(shouting over the
din)
Ladies and gentlemen, please! Please return to the study.
Everything
will be explained.
The guests file unhappily back into the study.
Mr.
Boddy walks past Wadsworth toward the rear of the hall.
WADSWORTH
(to Mr.
Boddy)
You too, Mr. Boddy.
Boddy starts running.
WADSWORTH
Other way!
He
pursues Mr. Boddy.
27 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--CONSERVATORY -- 27
The
conservatory is humid, with plants all around.
Three of the walls are
brick, and the fourth is glass,
leading to the outside.
The rain can be
heard and seen, against the glass.
Mr. Boddy runs in, picks up a brick and
prepares to throw it through the glass.
Wadsworth enters.
WADSWORTH
You
can't get out that way.
BODDY
Why not? It's only glass!
Suddenly, a
vicious Doberman jumps at the glass, barking and snarling.
Boddy drops the
brick.
28 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 28
The guests are already
present.
Wadsworth and Mr. Boddy enter.
Wadsworth takes up his envelope
again.
WADSWORTH
Ladies and gentlemen, you all have one thing in
common.
You're all being blackmailed.
For some considerable time, all of
you have been paying
what you can afford and, in some cases, more than you
can
afford to someone who threatens to expose you.
And none of you know
who's blackmailing you, do you?
PEACOCK
Oh, please! I've never heard
anything so ridiculous.
I mean, nobody could blackmail me.
My life is an
open book--I've never done anything wrong.
WADSWORTH
Anybody else wish to
deny it?
The guests look at each other, but no one
responds.
WADSWORTH
Very well. As everyone here is in
190
the same boat,
there's
no harm in my revealing some details.
And my instructions are to do
so. Thank you, Yvette.
The maid, so dismissed, leaves.
Mr. Boddy's eyes
follow her out.
WHITE
Don't you think you might spare us this
humiliation?
WADSWORTH
I'm sorry. Professor Plum, you were once a
professor of psychiatry,
specializing in helping paranoid and homicidal
lunatics
suffe
fa0
ring from delusions of grandeur.
PLUM
Yes, but now I work
for the United Nations.
WADSWORTH
So your work has not changed.
But you
don't practice medicine at the U.N.
His license to practice has bee lifted,
correct?
SCARLET
Why? What did he do?
WADSWORTH
You know what doctors
aren't allowed to do with their lady
patients?
SCARLET
Yeah?
WADSWORTH
Well, he did.
SCARLET
Ha!
PEACOCK
Oh,
how disgusting.
WADSWORTH
(swooping down on her)
Are you making moral
judgements, Mrs. Peacock?
How, then, do you justify taking bribes in return
for delivering your
husband Senator Peacock's vote to certain
lobbyists?
PEACOCK
My husband is a paid consultant. There is nothing wrong
with that!
WADSWORTH
Not if it's publicly declared, perhaps.
But if the
payment is delivered by slipping used greenbacks
in plain envelopes under
the door of the men's room,
how would you describe that
transaction?
SCARLET
I'd say it stinks.
PEACOCK
Well, how would you know.
When were you in that men's room?
PLUM
So it's
true!
PEACOCK
(standing)
No, it's a vicious lie!
WADSWORTH
I'm sure we're
all glad to hear that.
But you've been paying blackmail for over a year now
to keep that
story out of the papers.
WHITE
(to Peacock)
Well, I am
willing to believe you.
I too am being blackmailed for something I didn't
do.
GREEN
Me too.
MUSTARD
And me.
SCARLET
Not me.
WADSWORTH
You're not
being blackmailed?
SCARLET
Oh, I'm being blackmailed, all right.
But I did
what I'm being blackmailed for.
PLUM
(with interest)
What did you
do?
SCARLET
Well, to be perfectly frank, I run a specialized hotel and
a
telephone service which provide gentlemen with the company of a
young
lady for a short while.
PLUM
(very interested)
Oh, yeah?
(pulling out a
pen and notepad)
What's the phone number?
Miss Scarlet rolls her
eyes.
GREEN
So how did you know Colonel Mustard works in Washington?
Is he
one of your clients?
MUSTARD
(incredulous)
Certainly not!
GREEN
I was
asking Miss Scarlet.
MUSTARD
(to Scarlet)
Well, you tell him it's not
true!
SCARLET
It's not true.
PLUM
Is that true?
SCARLET
No, it's not
true.
GREEN
Ha-hah! So it is true!
WADSWORTH
A double
negative!
MUSTARD
Double "negative"? You mean you have--
(whispers to
Scarlet)
Photographs?
WADSWORTH
That sounds like a confession to me. In
fact, the double negative
has led to proof positive. I'm afraid you gave
yourself away.
MUSTARD
Are you trying to make me look stupid in front of
the other guests?
WADSWORTH
You don't need any help from me,
sir.
MUSTARD
That's right!
Mustard realizes what he just said.
PLUM
But
seriously, I don't see what's so terrible about Colonel Mustard
visiting a
house of ill fame.
(puts his hand on Scarlet's leg)
Most soldiers do, don't
they?
SCARLET
(standing)
Oh, please.
WADSWORTH
But he holds a sensitive
security post in the pentagon.
And, Colonel, you drive a very expensive car
for someone who lives
on a colonel's pay.
MUSTARD
I don't.
I came into
money during the war, when I lost my mommy and daddy.
Wadsworth is
puzzled, but soon recovers.
WADSWORTH
Mrs. White, you've been paying our
friend the blackmailer
ever since your husband died under, shall we
say,
mysterious circumstances.
Miss Scarlet laughs.
WHITE
Why is that
funny?
SCARLET
I see. That's why he was lying on his back. In his
coffin.
WHITE
I didn't kill him.
MUSTARD
Then why are you paying the
blackmailer?
WHITE
I don't want a scandal, do I?
We had had a very
humiliating public confrontation,
he was deranged . . . lunatic.
He didn't
actually seem to like me very much, he had
threatened to kill me in
public.
SCARLET
Why would he want to kill you in public?
WADSWORTH
I
think she meant he threatened, in public, to kill her.
SCARLET
Oh.
And was
that his final w
190
ord on the matter?
WHITE
Being killed is pretty final,
wouldn't you say?
WADSWORTH
And yet he was the one who died, not you, Mrs.
White, not you.
SCARLET
What did he do for a living?
WHITE
He was a
scientist. Nuclear physics.
SCARLET
What was he like?
WHITE
He was always
a rather stupidly optimistic man.
I mean, I'm afraid it came as a great
shock to him when he died.
fa0
But he was found dead at home. His head had been
cut off and
so had his . . . you know . . .
The men in the room cross their
legs.
WHITE
I had been out all evening at the movies.
SCARLET
Do you miss
him?
WHITE
Well, it's a matter of life after death.
Now that he's dead, I
have a life.
WADSWORTH
But he was your second husband. Your first husband
also disappeared.
WHITE
But that was his job. He was an
illusionist.
WADSWORTH
But he never reappeared.
WHITE
(shrugging)
He
wasn't a very good illusionist.
Mr. Green clears his throat and
stands.
GREEN
I have something to say.
(pauses)
I'm not going to wait for
Wadsworth here to unmask me.
I work for the state department. And I am a
homosexual.
Wadsworth, wide-eyed, looks for Green's file.
Mrs. Peacock
clucks in disgust.
GREEN
I feel no personal shame or guilt about this. But
I must
keep it a secret or I will lose my job on security grounds.
(pauses
again)
. . . Thank you.
Mr. Green sits back down next to Prof. Plum,
who
rapidly stands and walks away.
PLUM
Well, that just leaves Mr.
Boddy.
SCARLET
What's your little secret?
WADSWORTH
His secret?
Oh,
hadn't you guessed?
He's the one who's blackmailing you all.
Lightning
crashes.
Mr. Boddy looks very satisfied.
MUSTARD
You bastard!
The guests
advance on Mr. Boddy as he stands.
Col. Mustard challenges Mr. Boddy to
fight, boxing-style.
MUSTARD
Put 'em up!
Mr. Boddy steps on the Colonel's
toes and pokes him in the eyes.
GREEN
Gentlemen . . .
MUSTARD
If you
can't fight fairly, don't fight at all!
BODDY
Calls me a bastard!
Mr.
Green and the others try to separate them as
Colonel Mustard recovers and
Mr. Boddy goes for him.
Mrs. White decides to take matters into her own
hands and
knees Mr. Boddy in the crotch.
GREEN
Was that necessary, Mrs.
White?
WADSWORTH
Wait! Wait! The police are coming!
The guests
disapprove.
WADSWORTH
Listen! Blackmail depends on secrecy. You've all
admitted how
he's been able to blackmail you. All you have to do is tell
the police,
he'll be convicted, and your troubles will be
over.
BODDY
(standing, in pain)
's not so easy.
You'll never tell the
police.
WADSWORTH
Then I shall. I have evidence in my possession,
and this
conversation is being tape recorded.
28a -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BILLIARD
ROOM -- 28a
Yvette in the Billiard room, drinking cognac and listening
to
a tape recorder that is recording.
GREEN (V.O.)
Point of order--tape
recordings are not admissible evidence!
28b -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
STUDY -- 28b
The study.
General confusion ensues.
WADSWORTH
Ladies and
gentlemen, the police will be here in about
(checks his watch)
forty-five
minutes.
Tell them the truth, and Mr. Boddy will be behind bars.
Mr. Boddy
goes for the hall.
Wadsworth stops them.
WADSWORTH
Where are you going
this time?
BODDY
I think I can help them make up their minds.
Can I just
get my little bag from the hall?
Boddy exits.
28c -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 28c
The Hall.
Mr. Boddy gets his bags from by the
front door.
28d -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 28d
The study.
Mr.
Boddy opens his luggage.
BODDY
Who can guess what's in here,
eh?
WHITE
The evidence against us, no doubt.
Mr. Boddy chuckles.
He
starts handing out boxes, each with a different size and shape.
SCARLET
We
didn't know we were meeting you tonight.
Did you know you were meeting
us?
BODDY
Oh, yes.
WHITE
What were you told, precisely?
BODDY
Merely
that you were all meeting to discuss our little . . .
financial
arrangements. And if I did not appear,
Wadsworth would be informing the
police about it all.
Naturally I could hardly resist putting in an
appearance.
He finishes handing out the packages.
BODDY
(elbowing his way
to the door)
'Scuse me.
(eyeing the packages)
Open 'e
190
m.
SCARLET
Why not?
I
enjoy getting presents from strange men.
Scarlet opens her package.
A
candlestick.
SCARLET
A candlestick? What's this for?
Mrs. White opens her
box and reveals a rope-tied in a noose.
Mr. Green takes his box in one
hand. He opens it and lets
the contents fall into his other hand.
A bent
lead pipe.
Col. Mustard opens his box and pulls out . . .
a
fa0
heavy
wrench.
Prof. Plum takes the lid off his package and looks in.
He gingerly
pulls out a revolver.
Finally, the camera reveals Mrs. Peacock, who is
twirling
a dagger.
BODDY (O.S.)
In your hands, you each have a lethal
weapon.
Mr. Boddy walks on camera and continues.
BODDY
If you denounce me
to the police, you will also be exposed and humiliated.
I'll see to that in
court.
(pauses)
But . . . if one of you kills Wadsworth now . .
.
Wadsworth's eyes widen in shock.
BODDY
. . . no one but the seven of
us will ever know.
He has the key to the front door, which he said
would
only be opened over his dead body.
I suggest we take him up on that
offer.
Mr. Boddy goes over to the light switch with deliberate ease.
He
closes the door to the hall and sets his drink down.
BODDY
The only way to
avoid finding yourselves on the front pages
is for one of you to kill
Wadsworth.
Now.
He turns off the lights.
We hear noises.
Someone inhales
raspily.
A gunshot.
Something ceramic shatters.
A scream.
The lights go
up.
Mrs. Peacock, who turned on the light, drops the dagger in shock.
The
camera reveals Mr. Boddy lying prone on the floor.
MUSTARD
It's not
Wadsworth!
The guests talk to each other.
PLUM
Stand back! Give him
air!
(kneels next to Mr. Boddy)
Let me see.
(checks Mr. Boddy for signs of
life)
He's dead!
WHITE
Who had the gun?
PLUM
I did.
PEACOCK
Then you
shot him!
PLUM
I didn't!
PEACOCK
Well, you had the gun. If you didn't
shoot him, who did?
Mr. Boddy is turned over.
PLUM
Nobody! Look, there's
no gunshot wound.
Somebody tried to grab the gun from me in the dark
and
the gun went off.
Look! The bullet broke that vase on the mantel!
Everyone
rushes for the mantel simultaneously, causing confusion.
MUSTARD
He's
absolutely right. Look, there's a bullet hole here in the wall. See
that?
Mr. Green grabs Prof. Plum by the lapels.
GREEN
How did he
die?
PLUM
I don't know!
(shoves him away)
I'm not a forensic
expert.
WHITE
Well, one of us must have killed him!
GREEN
Well, I didn't
do it.
PEACOCK
Oh, I need a drink!
She goes to the door and gets Mr.
Boddy's cognac.
She sips.
PLUM
(alarmed)
Maybe he was poisoned!
Mrs.
Peacock drops the glass in revulsion and starts to scream.
She won't
stop.
Mr. Green takes her to a sofa, offering words of comfort.
She sits,
but won't stop screaming.
Mr. Green slaps her.
GREEN
I . . . I had to
stop her from screaming . . .
PLUM
(to Green)
Was the brandy
poisoned?
GREEN
I don't know.
SCARLET
(picks up the glass. All the cognac
has spilled out)
Looks like we'll never know.
GREEN
Unless . . . unless
she dies, too.
They all rush over to scrutinize Mrs. Peacock.
A scream
erupts from another room!
The guests gasp.
They run from the study into
the hall.
29 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 29
The guests run to the
door of the billiard room.
Mr. Green tries it.
GREEN
It's
locked!
WADSWORTH
Open up!
PLUM
It must be the murderer.
GREEN
Why would
he scream?
WHITE
He must have a victim in there. Oh, my God!
Yvette!
GREEN
Oh, my God!
The doors open.
30 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--BILLIARD ROOM -- 30
The guests pour in.
WADSWORTH
You're
alive!
YVETTE
No sanks to you!
WADSWORTH
What do you mean?
YVETTE
You
lock me up with a murderer, you eediot!
WHITE
So the murderer is in this
room.
YVETTE
Mai Oui!
GREEN
But where?
YVETTE
Where? 'Ere!
Mr. Green
looks behind the door.
YVETTE
We are all looking at eem. Or 'er.
Is what
Mrs. White said in ze study--one of you is ze killer!
PLUM
How did you
know we said that?
YVETTE
I was lisuning!
WHITE
But why were you
screaming in here all by yourself?
YVETTE
Because I am frightened. Me too,
I also drink ze cognac.
(sobbing)
Mon diou. I can't stay in here by
myself.
190
Miss Scarlet and Col. Mustard go to Yvette.
SCARLET
Come back to
the study with us.
YVETTE
With ze murderer?
MUSTARD
(shaking the
wrench)
There is safety in numbers . . .
(realizing and putting the wrench
away)
. . . my dear.
The guests leave the room.
After they are gone,
Wadsworth takes the tape off the spools.
31 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
STUDY -- 31
GREEN
Is th
fa0
ere no indication of how he
died?
PLUM
No.
WADSWORTH
This is terrible. This isabsolutely terrible!
It's not what I'd intended.
Oh, my God . . .
WHITE
Not what YOU
intended?
SCARLET
So you're not the butler?
WADSWORTH
I'm not THE butler,
but I am A butler.
In fact, I was his butler.
PLUM
So if he told you to
invite us all to his house, why did he arrive late?
WADSWORTH
I invited
you. In fact, I wrote the letters.
It was all my idea.
WHITE
Wait a
minute. I-I don't understand.
Why did you invite us here to meet your late
employer?
Were you assisting him to blackmail us?
WADSWORTH
Certainly
not!
WHITE
I think you had better explain.
WADSWORTH
Please sit down.
Everyone.
Everyone sits but Mr. Green.
He searches for a spot, but no one
gives it to him.
He ends up leaning against a serving
table.
WADSWORTH
When I said that I was Mr. Boddy's butler,
this was both
true and misleading.
I was once his butler,
but it was not his untimely
death this evening
that brought my employment with him to an
end.
MUSTARD
When did it come to an end?
WADSWORTH
When my wife decided
to . . . end her life.
She too was being blackmailed by this odious man who
now
lies dead before us. He hated my wife for the same reason that
he hated
all of you. He believed that you were all thoroughly . . .
. . .
un-American.
Mr. Green's serving table gives way, landing him (and
several
pieces of crystal) on the floor.
GREEN
Sorry.
WADSWORTH
For some reason,
he felt that it was inappropriate for a senator
to have a corrupt wife, for
a doctor to take
advantage of his patients, for a wife to emasculate
her
husband and . . . and . . . so forth.
GREEN
But this is ridiculous!
If
he was such a patriotic American, why didn't he just report us
to the
authorities?
WADSWORTH
He decided to put his information to good use
and
make a little money out of it.
What could be more American than
that?
Several nods.
PLUM
And what was your role in all this?
WADSWORTH
I
was . . . a victim, too.
At least my wife was.
She had friends who were . .
.
(this is obviously painful for him)
. . . Socialists.
Gasps and
muttering from several guests,
the most vocal of whom is Mrs.
Peacock.
WADSWORTH
(holding back tears)
Well, we all make mistakes . .
.
(Mrs. White pulls a tissue from her bra and gives it to
him.)
WADSWORTH
But Mr. Boddy threatened to give my wife's name to
the
House Un-American Activities Committee unless she named them.
She
refused, and so he blackmailed her. We had no money,
and the price of his
silence was that we worked for him for nothing.
We were slaves! Well, to
make a long story short--
MUSTARD
Too late.
WADSWORTH
--The suicide of my
wife preyed on my mind,
and created a sense of injustice in me.
I resolved
to put Mr. Boddy behind bars.
It seemed to be the best way to do it, and to
free all of you
from the same burden of blackmail was to get everyone face
to face,
confront Mr. Boddy with his crimes, and then . . .
. . . turn him
over to the police.
PLUM
So, everything is explained.
SCARLET
Nothing's
explained. We still don't know who killed him!
WADSWORTH
Well, the point
is, we've got to find out in the next thirty-nine minutes.
Before the
police arrive!
PEACOCK
My God, we can't have them come here
now--
GREEN
But . . . how can we possibly find out which of you did
it?
PLUM
What do you mean which of "you" did it?
GREEN
Well, I didn't do
it!
WADSWORTH
Well, one of us did.
We all had the opportunity, we all had
a motive.
SCARLET
Great. We'll all go to the chair.
PLUM
Maybe it wasn't
one of us.
MUSTARD
Well, who else could it have been?
PLUM
Who else is in
the house?
WADSWORTH and YVETTE
Only the (ze) cook.
ALL
The cook!
32 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 32
The party runs from the study to the
Kitchen.
33 --
190
INT. GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN -- 33
They all get stuck in
the door, except for Mr. Green.
He steps down into the kitchen and looks
around.
GREEN
Well. She's not here.
The door to the freezer starts to
open.
Miss Scarlet screams.
The cook's body tumbles out into Mr. Green's
arms.
She now has the dagger sticking out of her back.
Mrs. Ho was not (and
is not) a light woman.
He is
fa0
having difficulty holding her.
GREEN
I didn't
do it!!
(pause)
Somebody help me, please?
(nobody moves)
Somebody help me,
PLEASE?
Several guests go to help.
One of them reaches for the
knife.
MUSTARD
Don't touch it. That's evidence.
WHITE
Not for us.
We have
to find out who did this. We can't take fingerprints!
MUSTARD
(to
Wadsworth)
I think you'd better explain yourself, Wadsworth.
WADSWORTH
Me?
Why me?
GREEN
Who would want to kill the cook?
SCARLET
Dinner wasn't that
bad.
MUSTARD
How can you make jokes at a time like this?
SCARLET
It's my
defense mechanism.
MUSTARD
Some defense. If I was the killer, I would kill
you next.
(Several guests look shocked)
SCARLET
Oh?
(Uncomfortable
silence)
MUSTARD
I said "if." "If"!
(pause)
Hey, come on.
There is only
one admitted killer here, and it is certainly not me,
it is her!
He points
at Mrs. White.
WHITE
I've admitted nothing.
MUSTARD
Well, you paid the
blackmail. How many husbands have you had?
WHITE
Mine or other
women's?
MUSTARD
Yours.
WHITE
Five.
MUSTARD
Five.
WHITE
Yes, just the
five. Husbands should be like Kleenex.
Soft, strong, and
disposable.
MUSTARD
You lure men to their deaths like a spider with
flies!
WHITE
Flies are where men are most
vulnerable.
MUSTARD
Right!
(Again, he realizes what he just
said)
MUSTARD
Well, if it wasn't you, then who was it?
Who had the dagger,
anyway?
It was you, Mrs. Peacock, wasn't it?
PEACOCK
Yes, but I put it
down.
PLUM
Where?
PEACOCK
In the study.
PLUM
When?
PEACOCK
I don't
know!
Before I fainted, after I fainted, I don't know!
But any of you could
have picked it up.
WADSWORTH
Hmm.
Look. I suggest we take the cook's body
into the study.
MUSTARD
Why?
WADSWORTH
I'm the butler. I like to keep the
kitchen tidy.
34 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 34
The camera faces
the door that leads from the study to the hall.
The men are carrying the
cook's body into the study,
effectively blocking off the women's
view.
PLUM
(dropping Mrs. Ho and pointing)
Look!
WADSWORTH and
GREEN
What?
PLUM
The body's gone!
Mrs. Ho is dropped.
PEACOCK
What are
you all staring at?
GREEN
Nothing . . .
PEACOCK
Well, who's
there?
MUSTARD
Nobody.
WADSWORTH
Nobody. No Boddy, that's what we
mean.
Mr. Boddy's body. It's gone.
WHITE
Maybe he wasn't dead.
PLUM
He
was.
SCARLET
We should have made sure!
PEACOCK
How? By cutting his head
off, I suppose.
WHITE
That wasn't called for.
SCARLET
Where is
he?
PLUM
We better look for him.
They look around.
GREEN
Well . . . he
couldn't have been dead.
PLUM
He was.
At least I thought he was.
But . . .
what difference does it make now?
SCARLET
It makes quite a difference to
him.
Maybe there is life after death.
WHITE
Life after death is as
improbable as sex after marriage.
GREEN
Maybe Mr. Boddy killed the
cook!
SCARLET and WHITE
Yes!
WADSWORTH
How?
Mr. Green is at a
loss.
PEACOCK
Well, if you'll excuse me, I have to, um . . .
(to
Yvette)
Is there a little girls' room?
YVETTE
Oui, oui,
madame.
PEACOCK
No, I just want to powder my nose, thank you.
Yvette is
bewildered.
Mrs. Peacock steps over Mrs. Ho's corpse into the hall.
Miss
Scarlet, wandering around, picks up something.
SCARLET
What's this,
Wadsworth?
WADSWORTH
I'm afraid those are the negatives to which Colonel
Mustard earlier referred.
MUSTARD
(Going for them)
Oh, my
God!
SCARLET
Were you planning to blackmail him,
Wadsworth?
WADSWORTH
Certainly not!
I'd obtained them for the Colonel, and
I was going to give
them back as soon as Mr. Boddy was
unmasked.
SCARLET
Mmmm . . . very pretty.
Would you like to see these,
Yvette? They might shock you . . .
YVETTE
No, merci. I am a
lay-dee.
SCARLET
Oh, how do you know what kind of
190
pictures they are
if
you're such a "lay-dee"?
PLUM
What sort of pictures are
they?
MUSTARD
They are my pictures, and I'd like them back,
please.
SCARLET
No, I'm afraid there's something in them that concerns me
too.
Prof. Plum snatches the pictures and holds them up to the
light.
PLUM
Let me see . . .
WHITE
(looking)
Oh, my.
Nobody can get into
that position.
PLU
fa0
M
(putting the pictures down)
Sure they can. Let me show
you.
Plum starts to demonstrate with Mrs. White on the couch.
WHITE
Get
off me!
35 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL--REAR -- 35
Mrs. Peacock opens
the door to the bathroom.
She screams.
Mr. Boddy's body falls out and lands
in her outstretched arms.
He is almost certainly dead now; his head is
bloody.
The party runs out to help her.
PLUM
Mr. Boddy!
GREEN
He's
attacking her!
They pull the corpse off Mrs. Peacock.
WHITE
Well, he's
dead.
WADSWORTH
Mr. Boddy. Dead. Again.
PEACOCK
(fanning herself)
Oh, my
God . . .
WADSWORTH
She's going to faint.
PLUM
Somebody catch
her!
WADSWORTH
(going behind Mrs. Peacock and encircling her with his
arms)
I'll catch you. Fall into my arms.
(she slips right through)
Sorry .
. .
WHITE
(looking at Mr. Green)
You've got blood on your hands . .
.
GREEN
(panicking)
I didn't do it!
WADSWORTH
He's got new injuries.
He
picks up Mr. Boddy's arm and lets it fall again.
WADSWORTH
Well, he's
certainly dead now.
Why would anyone want to kill him twice?
SCARLET
It
seems so unnecessary.
MUSTARD
It's what we call "overkill."
PLUM
It's
what we call "psychotic."
GREEN
Unless he wasn't dead before.
PLUM
What's
the difference?
WADSWORTH
(shouting)
That's what we're trying to find
out!
We're trying to find out who killed him, and where, and with
what!
PLUM
There's no need to shout!
WADSWORTH
(even louder)
I'm not
shouting!!
All right, I am.
I'm shouting, I'm shouting, I'm shout--
At
which point the candlestick, which had been nestled above
the bathroom
door, falls and hits him on the head.
Wadsworth hits the floor.
36 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 36
Mrs. Peacock has evidently recovered
somewhat.
The women are taking the heavier Mrs. Ho into the room,
the men
have the lighter Mr. Boddy.
The guests make groans of exertion.
Col.
Mustard is issuing orders.
MUSTARD
Okay, put the corpses on the
sofa.
(pause)
Ladies first.
More sounds of exertion.
They plop Mr. Ho on
the sofa.
Wadsworth enters, holding ice to his head.
WADSWORTH
Careful,
don't get blood on the sofa.
YVETTE
How do we do sis? Ze dagger will go
furzer into 'er back.
MUSTARD
Tip her forward, over the arm.
They do
so.
MUSTARD
Now Mr. Boddy.
More sounds of exertion.
Col. Mustard
nods.
Prof. Plum is stuck on the couch between the two corpses.
Rather
than move, he decides to make himself comfortable.
MUSTARD
Now. Who--
(he
closes Mr. Boddy's staring eyes)
Who had access to the
candlestick?
WHITE
It was given to you.
SCARLET
Yeah, but I dropped it on
the table.
Anyone could have picked it up. You . . . him . . .
Wadsworth
starts going around the room, picking up the weapons.
WADSWORTH
Look. We
still have all these weapons. The gun, the rope,
the wrench, the lead
pipe.
Let's put them all in this cupboard and lock it.
There's a homicidal
maniac about!
He locks the weapons in the cupboard.
Everyone states their
approval.
GREEN
What are you doing with the key?
WADSWORTH
Putting it in
my pocket.
GREEN
Why?
WADSWORTH
Well, to keep it safe,
obviously.
PEACOCK
That means that you can open it, whenever you
want.
WADSWORTH
But it also means that you can't.
PEACOCK
But what if
you're the murderer?
WADSWORTH
I'm not.
MUSTARD
But what if you
are?!
WADSWORTH
Well, it's got to be put somewhere.
If I've got it, I know
I'm safe.
PEACOCK
We don't know that WE are!
WADSWORTH
I've an idea.
We'll throw it away!
The party agrees.
37 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
HALL--FOYER -- 37
Wadsworth opens the door and prepares to throw the key
out.
Waiting outside the door is a MAN, who ducks, thinking
Wadsworth is
about to hit him.
The butler quickly recovers and pockets the key.
The rest
of the party runs up behi
190
nd him.
WADSWORTH
Sorry . . .
Sorry . . . (laughs
nervously)
Can we help?
MAN
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to disturb the whole
household, but . . .
my car broke down out here,
and I was wondering if I
could use your phone.
WADSWORTH
Just a moment, please.
The party huddles
together and discusses it.
The MOTORIST looks rather confused.
After a
time, the group turns to the M
fa0
otorist.
WADSWORTH
Very well, sir.
Would you
care to come in?
MOTORIST
Well? Where is it?
WADSWORTH
What, the
body?
MOTORIST
The phone. What body?
WADSWORTH
Well, there's no body.
There's nobody. There's nobody in the study.
PARTY
No!
WADSWORTH
But I
think there's a phone in the lounge.
MOTORIST
Thank you.
38 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 38
Wadsworth leads the Motorist inside and
indicates the phone.
WADSWORTH
When you've finished your call,
perhaps
you'd be good enough to wait here.
It is not a
question.
MOTORIST
Certainly.
Wadsworth exits the lounge.
39 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 39
Wadsworth closes the door to the lounge and
locks it.
Col. Mustard comes up behind him and puts a hand on his
shoulder.
Wadsworth yells in fright.
MUSTARD
Where's the
key?
WADSWORTH
In my pocket.
PLUM
Not that key; the key to the cupboard
with the weapons!
WADSWORTH
Do you still wish me to throw it
away?
ALL
Yes!!
40 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT -- 40
Wadsworth takes the
key from his pocket and throws it.
We see it land on the cement and bounce
into the foliage.
41 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 41
Wadsworth
closes the door.
WADSWORTH
Well. What now?
WHITE
(holding her hand
out)
Wadsworth, let me out.
WADSWORTH
No.
WHITE
Why not?
WADSWORTH
We've
got to know who did it. We're all in this together, now.
PEACOCK
If you
leave, I'll say that you killed them both.
General agreement among the
guests.
Mrs. White rubs against Wadsworth.
WHITE
Oh, Wadsworth, I'll make
you sorry you ever started this.
One day, when we're alone together . .
.
WADSWORTH
Mrs. White, no man in his right mind would be alone
together
with you.
MUSTARD
Well, I could use a drink!
General agreement
again.
Col. Mustard goes to the study and looks in.
MUSTARD
Just
checking.
PEACOCK
Everything all right?
MUSTARD
Yup. Two corpses.
Everything's fine.
42 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 42
Col. Mustard
is pouring himself a tall glass of whiskey.
MUSTARD
Anybody else want a
whiskey?
SCARLET
Yeah.
Col. Mustard fills three other glasses at
once,
spilling the drink over the table.
MUSTARD
All right, look. Pay
attention, everybody.
(to Wadsworth)
Wadsworth, am I right in thinking
there is nobody else in this house?
WADSWORTH
Mmm, no.
MUSTARD
Then there
IS someone else in this house?
WADSWORTH
No, sorry. I said "no," meaning
"yes."
MUSTARD
"'No,' meaning 'yes'"?
Look, I want a straight answer.
Is
there someone else or isn't there, yes or no?
WADSWORTH
Um,
no.
MUSTARD
"No," there IS, or "no," there ISN'T?
WADSWORTH
Yes.
Mrs.
White breaks her glass against the
fireplace.
WHITE
(exasperated)
Please!!
Don't you think we should get that
man out of the house
before he finds out what's been going on here?
She
tosses the remains of her glass into the air.
It shatters on the
hearth.
SCARLET
Yeah!
PLUM
How can we throw him outside in this
weather?
SCARLET
If we let him stay in the house, he may get
suspicious.
PLUM
If we throw him out, he may get even more
suspicious.
MUSTARD
If I were him, I'd be suspicious already.
PEACOCK
(at
wit's end)
Oh, who cares?! That guy doesn't matter! Let him stay,
locked up
for another half an hour! The police will be here by then,
and there are
two dead bodies in the study!!
ALL
Shhhh!
MUSTARD
Well, there is still
some confusion as to whether or not there's
anybody else in this
house.
WADSWORTH
I told you, there isn't.
MUSTARD
There isn't any
confusion, or there isn't anybody else.
WADSWORTH
Either. Or
both.
MUSTARD
Just give me a clear
answer!
WADSWORTH
Certainly!
(pause)
What was the question?
MUSTARD
Is
there anybody else in the house?!
ALL
No!!
MUSTARD
That's what he says,
but does he know?
I suggest w
190
e handle this in proper military fashion.
We
split up, and search the house.
PEACOCK
Split up!
MUSTARD
Yes. We have
very little time left, so we'll split up into
pairs.
PLUM
Pairs?
MUSTARD
Yes.
PLUM
Wait a minute. Suppose that one of
us IS the murderer?
If we split up into pairs,
whichever one is left with
the killer might get killed!
MUSTARD
Then we would have disc
fa0
overed who the
murderer is!
PEACOCK
But the other half of the pair would be
dead!
MUSTARD
This is war, Peacock! Casualties are inevitable.
You cannot
without breaking eggs--every cook will tell you that.
PEACOCK
But look
what happened to the cook!
GREEN
Colonel, are you willing to take that
chance?
MUSTARD
What choice have we?
SCARLET
None.
GREEN
I suppose
you're right.
YVETTE
Bon decor.
But it is dark upstairs, and I am
frightened of ze dark.
Will anyone go wiz me?
PLUM
I will.
MUSTARD
I
will.
GREEN
No, thank you.
WADSWORTH
I suggest we all draw lots, for
partners.
He takes long matchsticks from near the fireplace.
43 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN -- 43
Wadsworth is using a knife to cut the long
matchsticks
into different lengths.
He prepares them in his hand so the
matchs' lengths can't be seen.
WADSWORTH
Ready?
The two shortest together,
the next two shortest together. Agreed?
And I suggest the two shortest
search the cellar, and so on, up.
The guests approach the butler.
Col.
Mustard picks a matchstick. It's relatively short.
Mrs. Peacock picks
hers.
Mustard and Peacock compare. His is longer.
Miss Scarlet picks her
matchstick with a jerk.
Mr. Green reaches over Miss Scarlet's shoulder and
gets his
matchstick. It is one of the uncut sticks.
Col. Mustard and Mr.
Green compare. It's not even close.
Yvette selects her stick. It's another
long one.
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet compare.
They match, putting them
together on the ground floor.
Miss Scarlet looks disgusted.
Mrs. White
selects hers.
In the background, the party tries to match sticks.
Prof.
Plum picks his matchstick.
Wadsworth takes what is left.
Mrs. White steps
up to Wadsworth and pairs his matchstick.
They're going to the second
floor.
Prof. Plum walks by Yvette and a distraught Mr. Green,
who are
going to the attic together.
Plum matches cellar matchsticks with Mrs.
Peacock.
PLUM
It's you and me, honey bunch.
PEACOCK
Oh, God . . .
44 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 44
We see the party as it splits
up.
Wadsworth and Mrs. White start up the stairs,
as do Mr. Green and
Yvette.
Prof. Plum and Mrs. Peacock stop, unsure of where to go.
Wadsworth
pauses on a step and indicates the door
under the staircase.
WADSWORTH
The
cellar.
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet stop in the middle of the
Hall.
MUSTARD
Well, we know what's in the study, we've just come from
the
library, and the stranger's locked up in the lounge--
SCARLET
Let's go
look in the billiard room again.
They go to the Billiard Room.
Prof. Plum
opens the door to the cellar.
Mrs. Peacock reaches in and turns on the
light.
They enter cautiously.
45 -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--HALLWAY -- 45
The
storm is still around Hill House,
visible from a second-story
window.
Wadsworth and Mrs. White walk down the hallway as
Mr. Green and
Yvette start climbing the stairs to the attic.
We hear thunder and
rain.
46 -- INT. ATTIC -- 46
Darkness.
We don't know exactly where we
are.
Suddenly, a light turns on.
We see Mr. Green and Yvette, at the
bottom of the attic staircase.
Both of them are terrified of what may be
above them.
Silence.
GREEN
Do you want to go up in front of
me?
YVETTE
Absolutely no.
GREEN
I'm sure there's no one up
there.
YVETTE
Zen you go een fron.
GREEN
All right . . .
Neither
move.
We hear nothing but the rain on the roof.
47 -- INT.
CELLAR--STAIRCASE -- 47
Darkness.
We barely see Mrs. Peacock and Prof.
Plum backlit,
at the top of the stairs.
They edge down.
Mrs. Peacock
gasps.
PLUM
Well . . . Ladies first.
PEACOCK
No, no. You can go
first.
PLUM
No, no, no, I insist.
PEACOCK
No, I insist.
PLUM
Well, what
are you afraid of, a fate worse than death?
PEACOCK
No, just death. Isn't
that enough?
48 -- INT. SEC
190
OND FLOOR--HALLWAY -- 48
Mrs. White and
Wadsworth are at the doors of two adjacent rooms.
They are looking at each
other nervously.
WADSWORTH
Are you going in there?
WHITE
Yes, are
you?
WADSWORTH
Yes.
Pause.
WADSWORTH
Right!
WHITE
Right.
They look
in.
WADSWORTH
Um, I don't see any light switches in there.
WHITE
Well,
neither do I, but there must be switch
fa0
es somewhere.
WADSWORTH
Shall I come
in with you?
WHITE
No!
(recovers)
I mean . . . no, thank you.
They start
into their rooms and then jump out simultaneously,
looking for the
other.
49 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BILLIARD ROOM -- 49
Col. Mustard and
Miss Peacock are in back of the corner bar.
They're stooping to look
in.
They stand and Col. Mustard indicates the bar's narrow
egress.
MUSTARD
Ladies first.
SCARLET
No, thanks.
They both head for the
exit, and they have to squeeze through--
it's a very tight fit.
Col.
Mustard walks past Miss Scarlet,
who is sure to keep him in sight.
He grabs
a pool cue from the wall.
She gives a little gasp.
Col. Mustard walks over
to the pool table and motions with the
stick to look under it.
They
do.
There's nothing there.
50 -- INT. ATTIC-- 50
Mr. Green and Yvette
are still where they were;
at the bottom of the steps.
We hear
rain.
YVETTE
Go'n. I be right behind you.
GREEN
That's why I'm
nervous.
YVETTE
Zen we go togezer.
The two squeeze up the narrow
steps.
51 -- INT. CELLAR -- 51
Mrs. Peacock and Prof. Plum are still
inching down the stairs.
Mrs. Peacock turns on the lights as Prof. Plum
slips on a step.
This frightens Mrs. Peacock, who runs dow the remaining
few steps.
PEACOCK
Stay there!
52 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL--FOYER
-- 52
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet throw open the closet door.
Nothing
there.
53 -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--MASTER BEDROOM -- 53
Wadsworth is
wandering in the dark.
WADSWORTH
(nervously)
If there's anybody in here,
just look out!
54 -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--BEDROOM -- 54
Mrs. White is
wandering like Wadsworth.
WHITE
(nervously)
Are you hiding? I'm coming . .
.
55 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BALL ROOM -- 55
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet
are backlit.
We see the hall behind them.
MUSTARD
What room's
this?
SCARLET
Search me.
MUSTARD
All right.
He starts to frisk
her.
SCARLET
(threateningly)
Get your mitts off me.
He does.
56 -- INT.
CELLAR -- 56
Mrs. Peacock sees a rat and screams.
The rat crawls
away.
Prof. Plum tenses, but starts to look around.
57 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--BALL ROOM -- 57
Col. Mustard flips on the lights, making Miss
Scarlet gasp.
MUSTARD
Nobody here.
SCARLET
He's behind one of those
curtains . . . ?
She points to the curtains at the far end of the Ball
room.
MUSTARD
You look. I'll go search the kitchen.
Col. Mustard
leaves.
Miss Scarlet sighs.
She starts to walk--slowly--toward the
curtains.
The curtains almost seem to be moving, but it just could
be her
imagination.
Then--there is definite movement off to the right.
Scarlet
stops in her tracks, trying to scream but unable to.
She continues
cautiously.
Scarlet reaches the curtains, pauses . . .
and throws them
back, revealing . . .
A broken window with wind blowing in.
58 -- EXT.
ROADSIDE -- 58
It is still raining.
We see the Motorist's car on the side
of the road.
A cop car pulls up to investigate.
59 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 59
We see photographs and papers, as well as the tapes
of the
conversation Yvette was making earlier.
A gloved hand picks them
up.
The hand throws the photos and papers into the fire.
Then the tape
goes in. It all burns.
The hand now uses a key to unlock the cupboard with
the
weapons. But wasn't that key thrown away?
The weapons are
revealed.
60 -- INT. MOTORIST'S CAR -- 60
The camera reveals a COP,
shining his flashlight into the car.
60a -- EXT. ROADSIDE -- 60a
As
before.
We see the Cop shining his flashlight into the car.
61 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 61
The Motorist is making his phone
call.
MOTORIST
I'm a little nervous . . .
The camera reveals the Lounge's
fireplace, which is swiveling around.
MOTORIST
. . . I'm in this big
house, and I've
190
been locked into the lounge.
(pauses)
Yes.
The next
statements are intercut with the wrench approaching the
Motorist.
MOTORIST
The funny thing is,
there's a whole group of people
here having some sort of party.
And one of them is my old boss from--
The
wrench descends.
The phone falls to the floor, then the Motorist follows
suit.
A gloved hand places the phone back on its
fa0
cradle.
62 -- EXT.
ROADSIDE -- 62
The Cop shines his flashlight on the car's license
plate,
then underneath the car.
He walks away.
63 --INT. GROUND
FLOOR--CONSERVATORY -- 63
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet stand in the
doorway,
backlit by the Hall.
Rain can still be heard, but no
lightning.
Col. Mustard switches on the lights.
The two look around.
The
Conservatory is dilapidated. There is dust and cobwebs all
around--it
obviously hasn't been used for some time.
Miss Scarlet walks to the outer
wall of windows.
Rain pours down them.
Col. Mustard walks to one side and
picks up something.
He then takes a rag and wipes his hands off.
While
doing so, he leans against the wall, and it swings open!
He falls down, but
quickly gets up.
MUSTARD
Looks like a secret passage.
SCARLET
Should we
see where it leads?
MUSTARD
What the hell. I'll go first--I've had a good
life.
64 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--CONSERVATORY/LOUNGE SECRET PASSAGE --
64
The secret passage is narrow, and the floor is uneven.
Miss Scarlet
trips and yells in surprise.
SCARLET
Oh, God.
MUSTARD
It's all
right.
65 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 65
Col. Mustard and Miss
Scarlet emerge from behind the still-rotated fireplace.
They see the
Motorist's corpse.
SCARLET
Oh, my God!
The fireplace slides shut behind
them.
Scarlet panics--she starts yelling.
66 -- INT. ATTIC -- 66
Mr.
Green and Yvette can faintly hear Miss Scarlet's yells.
67 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 67
Scarlet and Mustard run to the double doors.
They're locked.
Now both are yelling.
68 -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--HALLWAY --
68
Wadsworth and Mrs. White run for the staircase.
68a -- INT. SECOND
FLOOR--ATTIC STAIRCASE--BASE -- 68a
Mr. Green and Yvette run down from the
attic.
68b -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--HALLWAY -- 68b
The four people collide
and go sprawling.
69 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 69
Miss Scarlet
and Col. Mustard are still banging at the door.
And screaming.
70 -- INT.
SECOND FLOOR--HALLWAY/THE HALL -- 70
The four upstairs untangle
themselves. Wadsworth and Mr. Green
run down the stairs followed by Yvette
and Mrs. White.
WADSWORTH
Where's it coming from?
GREEN
Where are we
going?
They make it to the ground floor just as Prof. Plum and
Mrs.
Peacock emerge from the cellar.
WHITE
Where are they?
WADSWORTH
The
lounge!
Wadsworth tries the door. It's locked.
PLUM
The door's
locked!
GREEN
(impatiently)
I know . . .
PLUM
Then unlock
it!
GREEN
Where's the key?
Wadsworth searches his pockets.
WADSWORTH
The
key is gone!!
PLUM
Never mind about the key! Unlock the door!
Mr. Green
grabs Prof. Plum and begins to shake him.
GREEN
I can't unlock the door
without the key!
Green releases the Professor and bangs on the
door.
GREEN
Let us in! Let us in!
70a -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE
-- 70a
SCARLET and MUSTARD
Let us out! Let us out!
70b -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 70b
WADSWORTH
It's no good. Stand back.
He backs up
all the way across the hall to the study door.
WADSWORTH
There's no
alternative. I'm just going to have to break it down!
The butler runs at
full speed for the door.
He hits it and falls to the floor, holding his
shoulder.
Yvette gets an idea.
YVETTE
I know! I have eet!
70c -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 70c
The two in the lounge are still
yelling.
70d -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 70d
PEACOCK
Will you shut
up? . . .
70e -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 70e
Yvette grabs the
revolver from the open cupboard.
PEACOCK (O.S.)
. . . We're doing our
best!
70f -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 70f
Yvette runs out of the
study and trips over the still-sprawled Wadsworth.
The shot goes wild,
hitting the chandelier rope.
Mr. Green and Prof. Plum hit the deck.
T
190
he
chandelier stars spinning.
Mrs. Peacock and Mrs. White run into each
other.
70g -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 70g
Mustard and Scarlet
are crouched down.
MUSTARD
They're shooting at us . . .
70h -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 70h
Panic continues.
The chandelier continues to
spin, and the rope is fraying,
unbeknownst to the party.
Yvette stands and
aims
fa0
at the Lounge lock.
Plum and Green, who had started to get up, hit
the floor again.
Yvette fires twice. Both shots hit the door lock.
70i
-- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LOUNGE 70i
Col. Mustard turns away from the door,
holding his shoulder.
MUSTARD
I've been shot . . .
71 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 71
MUSTARD (O.S.)
. . . I've been shot!
YVETTE
Come
out!
The door eez open!
She lowers the gun, so it is carelessly pointing
in the direction of
Prof. Plum and Mr. Green. They scramble out of the
way.
The lounge door opens and a (miraculously unwounded)
Col. Mustard and
Miss Scarlet emerge.
MUSTARD
(angrily, to Yvette)
Why are you shooting
that thing at us?
YVETTE
To get joo out.
He shoves her.
MUSTARD
You
know, you could have killed us!
I could've been killed!
Shot of the
chandelier, spinning ever more quickly.
The rope is almost completely
frayed.
MUSTARD
I can't take any more scares.
The rope snaps.
The
chandelier lands three feet in back of Col. Mustard.
Mustard is in shock.
He collapses onto a love seat.
SCARLET
(pointing into the lounge, almost
hysterical)
But look!
The party runs across the room, crushing glass as
they go.
PEACOCK
(accusatory)
Which one of you did it?
SCARLET
We found
him! Together!
WHITE
How did you get in?
GREEN
The door was
locked.
WHITE
It's a great trick!
SCARLET
There's a secret passageway
from the conservatory.
PLUM
(to Yvette)
Is that the same
gun?
PEACOCK
From the cupboard?
PLUM
But it was locked!
YVETTE
No, eet
was oonlocked!
GREEN, PLUM, and WADSWORTH
Unlocked?
YVETTE
But, yes. See
for yourself!
The party runs into the lounge.
On the way, Yvette tosses
the revolver under the broken chandelier.
72 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
STUDY -- 72
The guests pile in and see that the cupboard has indeed been
opened.
PEACOCK
How did you know it was unlocked?
How did you know that
you could get at the gun?
YVETTE
I didn't.
I sink--I would bray kit open
bud it was open alreddy.
PEACOCK
A likely story.
The doorbell rings.
CUT
TO
Shot of the doorbell ringing.
CUT TO
The guests freezing in
place.
SCARLET
Maybe they'll just go away.
CUT TO
The doorbell. It is
still.
CUT TO
The guests, still frozen.
The doorbell rings again.
CUT
TO
The doorbell ringing.
CUT TO
The guests, quite
disappointed.
GREEN
I'm going to open it.
SCARLET
Why?!
GREEN
I have
nothing to hide! I didn't do it!
(holding his hand out to Wadsworth)
The
key.
Wadsworth hands the key to Mr. Green.
GREEN
Thank you . . .
Mr.
Green strides into the hall, followed by the rest of the party.
73 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL--FOYER -- 73
Mr. Green opens the door,
revealing the Cop.
COP
Good evening, sir.
The door closes in the Cop's
face.
74 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--PORCH--VIEW INSIDE -- 74
The door
reopens.
GREEN
Yes?
COP
I found an abandoned car down near the gates of
this house.
Did the driver come in here for any help, by any
chance?
Everyone but Mr. Green insists that that was not the
case.
GREEN
Well, actually, yes.
ALL but GREEN
No.
COP
There seems to be
some kind of disagreement.
Everyone but Mr. Green again
disagrees.
GREEN
Yes.
COP
(quite confused now)
Uh, can I come in and use
your phone?
Wadsworth steps to the front door.
WADSWORTH
Of course you
may, sir.
You may use the one in the, um, no . . .
Uh, you could use the
one in the st-- no . . .
Would you be kind enough to wait in the um, in
the, em, library?
COP
(very confused)
Sure.
75 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
HALL -- 75
The Cop sees Yvette.
COP
(to Yvette)
Don't I know you from
someplace?
The maid shrugs.
COP
(to group)
You all seem to be very
anxious about something.
WADSWORTH
It's the chandelier. It fell down.
Almost killed us.
Would
190
you like to come this way, please, sir?
Miss
Scarlet closes the door to the study suddenly
and attempts to look
nonchalant.
The Cop whirls at the sound.
Professor Plum does the same to
the lounge door.
The Cop whirls again.
WADSWORTH
Frightfully drafty, these
old houses.
76 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 76
Wadsworth leads the
Cop in and indicates the phone.
WADSWORTH
fa0
Please help yourself to a drink,
if you'd like.
The Cop reaches for the cognac.
WADSWORTH
Not the cognac.
Just in case.
The butler exists and closes the door.
COP
Just in case of
what?
77 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 77
Wadsworth locks the door
and turns to the assembled guests.
WADSWORTH
(whispering)
What now?
77a
-- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 77a
The Cop tries the door handle. It is,
of course, locked.
77b -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 77b
GREEN
We
should have told him.
PEACOCK
Oh, very well for you to say that
now.
GREEN
(defensively)
I said it then!
ALL
Oh, shut
up!
WADSWORTH
(indicating the shattered chandelier)
Let's clean this
up.
78 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 78
The Cop pauses at the door,
then walks over to the phone.
He reaches for it, but it rings before he
picks it up.
He answers the phone.
COP
Hello?
78a -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 78a
All are still.
WADSWORTH
Maybe the cop answered it
. . .
78b -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 78b
COP
And who shall I say
is calling?
(pauses)
Ah . . . will you hold on, please?
The Cop strides
over to the library doors.
COP
Let me out of here!
Let me out of here, you
have no right to shut me in!
I'll book you for false arrest, and wrongful
imprisonment,
and obstructing an officer in the course of his duty!
And
murder!
79 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 79
The door opens.
The
party stands there, Wadsworth with broom in hand.
WADSWORTH
What do you
mean . . . "murder"?
COP
I just said it so you'd open the door.
The
guests sigh and laugh nervously.
COP
What's going on around here? And why
would you lock me in?
And why are you receiving phone calls from J. Edgar
Hoover?
WADSWORTH
J. Edgar Hoover?
COP
That's right. The head of the
Federal Bureau of Investigation.
MUSTARD
Why is J. Edgar Hoover on your
phone?
WADSWORTH
I don't know.
He's on everybody else's, why shouldn't he
be on mine?
(steps to the library door)
Excuse me.
Wadsworth enters, then
closes and locks the door.
COP
What's going on here?
Miss Scarlet drapes
herself on the Cop.
SCARLET
We're having a . . . party . . .
The guests
laugh even more nervously than before.
COP
Mind if I look
around?
SCARLET
Sure . . .
You can show him around, Mr.
Green!
GREEN
Me?
SCARLET
Yes!
Uh, you can show him the . . .
. . .
dining room . . . the kitchen . . . the ball room . .
.
GREEN
(stiffly)
Fine . . .
Fine . . . . Officer, um, come with me. I'll
show you the . . . dining room . .
.
. . . or the kitchen . . . or the
ball room . . .
80 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM -- 80
The Cop
raises the metal partition and looks into the kitchen.
81 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--LOUNGE -- 81
SCARLET
. . . make it look convincing.
82 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM -- 81
GREEN
So! This is the dining room.
COP
No
kidding.
83 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LOUNGE -- 83
SCARLET
Come on . .
.
84 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM -- 84
COP
What's going on in
those two rooms?
GREEN
Uh . . . which two rooms?
The Cop pushes past him
and enters the hall.
84a -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 84a
A couple
of guests run frantically across the Hall.
Just as they leave the room,
the
Cop enters and points at the lounge and the study.
COP
Those two
rooms.
GREEN
Oh . . . those two rooms . . .
COP
Yes!
Mr. Green is at a
loss.
The Cop strides toward the study door.
Mr. Green blocks the Cop's
path.
GREEN
Officer, I don't think you should go in there.
COP
Why
not?
GREEN
Uh . . .
The Cop dodges around Mr. Green.
The guest blocks the
door to the study with his body.
GREEN
Because it's . . . all too
shocking!
The Cop throws Mr. Green aside.
85 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
STUDY -- 85
Music can be heard in th
190
e background.
It's "Life Could Be a
Dream," on a record player.
Mrs. White is on a couch on top of Mr. Boddy,
using her hand to
move his arm against her and pretending to kiss him.
The
Cop sees Col. Mustard and a woman apparently kissing against
the far wall,
in a curtain.
The camera reveals that Mrs. Peacock is behind the
curtain.
Hehands are on Col. Mustard's back, but Mrs. Ho
fa0
is propped
up
between them.
COP
(to Mr. Green)
It's not all that shocking.
These
folks are just having a good time.
The Cop leaves to the hall. Mr. Green
is surprised.
86 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 86
Miss Scarlet
pours a drink into the Motorist's mouth.
The Motorist is propped up in a
chair, drink in hand.
The music can still be heard, but faintly.
87 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 87
Col. Mustard and Mrs. Peacock roll Mrs.
Ho on to the couch.
PEACOCK
Oh, my God . . .
88 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- 88
Just before the Cop enters, Prof. Plum takes Miss
Scarlet on to
the couch and begins kissing her.
She has no choice but to
follow his example.
The Cop comes in.
COP
Excuse me?
The two "lovers" get
up with a start.
The Cop notices the Motorist.
He leans into the dead
man's face and sniffs.
COP
(to Plum and Scarlet)
This man's drunk.
Dead
drunk.
SCARLET
Dead right . . .
COP
(louder, to Motorist)
You're not
going to drive home, are you?
PLUM
He won't be driving home, officer! I
promise you that!
SCARLET
Yeah . . .
COP
Somebody will give him a lift,
huh?
SCARLET
Oh, we'll . . . we'll . . . get him a car.
PLUM
A long black
car.
SCARLET
(quickly)
A limousine.
Prof. Plum again lowers Miss Scarlet
to the couch.
She gives off a little cry of surprise.
89 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 89
Wadsworth exits the library.
He leans against the
door and sighs in thought.
The Cop and Mr. Green enter the Hall.
Wadsworth
throws off his thoughts and walks to them.
WADSWORTH
Officer!
COP
You're
too late--I've seen it all.
All during this conversation, Mr. Green is
standing behind the Cop,
looking at Wadsworth. Green looks mystified, but
relieved.
WADSWORTH
You have?
(pause)
I can explain everything.
COP
You
don't have to.
WADSWORTH
I don't?
COP
Don't worry!
There's nothing
illegal about any of this.
WADSWORTH
(confused)
Are you sure?
COP
Of
course! This is America.
WADSWORTH
I see . . .
COP
(clapping Wadsworth on
the shoulder)
It's a free country, don't you know that?
WADSWORTH
(still
doesn't understand)
I didn't know it was THAT free.
The Cop glances back
at Mr. Green, who tries to look innocent.
COP
(to Wadsworth)
May I use
your phone now?
WADSWORTH
Certainly!
The butler leads the Cop to the
library once again, and locks it.
The guests start to emerge into the
Hall.
GREEN
Why did you lock him in again?
WADSWORTH
(whispering)
We
haven't finished searching the house, yet.
PLUM
(whispering)
Well, we're
running out of time.
Only fifteen minutes before the police
come.
GREEN
(whispering fiercely)
The police already
came!
ALL
(whispering fiercely)
Shut up!!
WADSWORTH
Let's get on with
it!
YVETTE
(to Mr. Green)
Monsieur?
The guests again split up to search
the house as the music continues.
90 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN --
90
Col. Mustard and Miss Scarlet enter.
Col. Mustard suddenly opens a
door, only to have
an ironing board hit him in the head.
Miss Scarlet opens
the door to the freezer. She grasps one of
the meathooks.
It turns in her
grip and reveals another secret passage in
the back of the freezer.
She
gives a cry of surprise.
SCARLET
Look!
I can't believe it. I wonder where
this one goes.
MUSTARD
Well, let's find out.
They step in.
91 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 91
The music still continues.
Col. Mustard and
Miss Scarlet swing aside a large painting and
enter the room from the
secret passage.
They shrug.
MUSTARD
Let's try the ball room again.
92
-- INT. ATTIC -- 92
Mr. Green and Yvette are still poking around in the
attic.
93 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--CELLAR STEPS--TOP -- 93
The camera
reveals a gloved hand pulling a lever down.
All electricity is shut off.
The lights go out instantly,
and
190
the music stops.
94 -- INT.
CELLAR--BOILER ROOM -- 94
Mrs. Peacock, in the darkness, backs up into the
boiler.
She thinks it's a person, perhaps Prof. Plum, and starts
to hit it
with her handbag.
PEACOCK
Ahh!
Don't you touch me!
95 -- INT. SECOND
FLOOR--MASTER BEDROOM -- 95
A gust of wind blows in, shutting a
door.
Wadsworth yells in fright.
96 -- INT. SECOND FLO
fa0
OR--BEDROOM --
96
Mrs. White screams.
97 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--STAIRCASE -- 97
Yvette
is descending the stairs quietly.
Mrs. White's scream can still be
heard.
98 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 98
The Cop is on the
phone.
COP
Hello? Hello?
99 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BILLIARD ROOM --
99
Yvette enters quietly.
An off-screen voice can be heard.
It can't be
identified, even as being male or female.
The first line sounds male, the
second female.
VOICE
Shut the door.
Did anyone recognize you?
Suddenly,
Yvette's French accent is gone.
YVETTE
They must have. And not just my
face.
They know every inch of my body.
And they're not the only ones . .
.
A noose flies onto Yvette's neck!
YVETTE
(gasping)
It's you!
100 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 100
The Cop is still on the
phone.
COP
(whispering into phone)
There's something funny going on around
here.
I don't know what it is . . .
The camera reveals the door handle
being silently opened.
COP
No, I'm not on duty.
But I have a feeling that
I'm in danger.
You know that big, ugly house on top--
The lead pipe comes
down softly on the phone cradle, cutting the
connection off.
We can see
the pipe being raised behind the Cop's head.
COP
Hello? Hello?
Are you
there?
101 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 101
The doorbell is
ringing.
102 -- VIEWS OF THE GUESTS' FACES -- 102
103 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL--VIEW OUTSIDE -- 103
The front door opens.
A young woman
is outside. She is dressed in a uniform, and
strikes a pose as the door
opens.
SINGING TELEGRAM GIRL
(singing)
I . . . am . . . your singing
telegram--
The gun fires.
She falls to the ground.
The door slams
shut.
104 -- INT. ATTIC--REAR ROOM -- 104
Mr. Green, trying to get out,
opens a closet.
Its contents fall on him.
105 -- INT. SECOND
FLOOR--BEDROOM -- 105
A jack-in-the-box springs open, frightening Mrs.
White.
She screams.
106 -- INT. SECOND FLOOR--MASTER BEDROOM -- 106
Mrs.
White's unintelligible yells can be
heard.
WADSWORTH
(yelling)
Shouting!
I'm coming!
I'm just trying to find
the door!
Wadsworth enters another part of the Master
bedroom.
WADSWORTH
Coming . . .
He grasps a handle.
WADSWORTH
What's
this?
I'm at the door?
He twists the handle, starting the shower.
He is
promptly very wet.
107 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--STAIRCASE -- 107
A very wet
Wadsworth sloshes down the steps.
He goes to the entrance to the cellar and
pulls up the lever,
restoring electricity to Hill House.
108 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 108
The record player starts again,
taking
several seconds to get up to speed.
109 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL --
109
The party (minus Yvette) slowly reassembles in the Hall.
The song
ends.
110 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BILLIARD ROOM -- 110
The camera reveals
the guests looking in from the Hall.
They see Yvette's corpse sprawled on
the pool table,
still with the noose on her neck, and they walk off.
111
-- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 111
The camera reveals the guests looking
in from the Hall.
They see the Cop's corpse hung over a table.
The guests
stand at the door.
GREEN
Two murders.
Prof. Plum enters the library and
picks up the lead pipe.
PLUM
Neither of them shot.
I thought I heard a
gun.
WHITE
I did.
PEACOCK
So did I.
SCARLET
I thought I heard the front
door slam!
MUSTARD
Oh, God . . .
The murderer must have run out.
The
guests run toward the front door.
112 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--PORCH --
112
The guests open the door, seeing the singing telegram girl's body.
It
has a bullet hole neatly through the forehead.
WADSWORTH
Three
murders.
GREEN
Six, all together.
WADSWORTH
This is getting
serious.
They close the door and lock it.
113 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE
HALL -- 113
The guests
190
walk onto the main floor.
WADSWORTH
No gun. Yvette
dropped it here.
(declaring)
Very well . . . I know who did
it.
ALL
(incredulously)
You do?
WADSWORTH
And furthermore, I'm going to
tell you how it was all done.
Follow me.
He walks to the library. The
guests follow.
114 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 114
Wadsworth
addresses the assembled guests.
WADSWORTH
In
fa0
order to help you understand
what happened,
I shall need to take you through the events of the
evening,
step by step.
At the start of the evening, Yvette was here, by
herself,
waiting to offer you all a glass of champagne.
I was in the
Hall.
(pauses)
I know, because I was there.
Then, I hurried across to the
kitchen.
He waves for the guests to follow him.
115 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--KITCHEN -- 115
Wadsworth is running into the kitchen, the guests
following.
WADSWORTH
And the cook was in here, alive, sharpening
knives,
preparing for dinner. And then . . .
116 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 116
Wadsworth springs up to the front door, the guests
following closely.
He proceeds to act out events.
WADSWORTH
And the
doorbell rang . . .
(to Col. Mustard)
And it was you!
MUSTARD
Yes . .
.
WADSWORTH
(breathlessly)
I asked you for your coat, and I recognized you
as Colonel Mustard
and I prevented you from telling your real name because
I didn't want
any of you to use any name other than your pseudonym and
I
introduced myself to you as a butler and I ran across the Hall
to the
library!
He does so, with the confused guests in tow.
117 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--LIBRARY -- 117
Wadsworth imitates everything he
describes.
WADSWORTH
And then Yvette met you . . . and smiled . . .
(he
smiles)
. . . and poured you a drink.
He runs for the Hall.
118 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL--FOYER -- 118
Wadsworth heads for the front
door.
WADSWORTH
(still breathless)
And the doorbell rang! And it was Mrs.
White, looking pale and tragic,
and I took her coat, and made off!
They
head for the library again.
119 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--LIBRARY --
119
WADSWORTH
And I introduced to Colonel Mustard.
(imitating them)
Hello.
Hello.
And I noticed that Mrs. White and Yvette . . . flinched!
Then . . .
there was a rumble of thunder, and a crash of lightning.
He
demonstrates.
WADSWORTH
And, to make a long story short--
ALL
Too
late.
WADSWORTH
--one by one, you all arrived.
120 -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 120
Wadsworth grabs the gong mallet.
WADSWORTH
And
then the gong was struck by the cook!
He does so.
WADSWORTH
And we went
into the dining room!
121 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM --
121
Wadsworth goes around the table, indicating
chairs.
WADSWORTH
(breathless)
And Mrs. Peacock sat here, and Professor
Plum sat here . . .
(acts as if slurping soup)
and Mrs. White sat here . .
.
(imitates them slurping soup)
and Mr. Green, Miss Scarlet, Colonel
Mustard.
This chair (indicates the head) was vacant.
Anyway, we all
revealed we'd all received a letter.
(points at various chairs)
And you'd
had a letter, and you'd had a letter, and you'd had a letter--
ALL
Get on
with it!!
WADSWORTH
The point is--blackmail!
GREEN
But all this came out
after dinner--in the study!
WADSWORTH
You're right!
He heads into the
Hall.
122 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 122
The party runs across
the Hall to the study.
123 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--STUDY -- 123
The butler
rushes around the room, pointing at different locations.
WADSWORTH
Mr.
Green stood here, and Mrs. Peacock here, and Miss Scarlet
here, and
Professor Plum here, and Colonel Mustard, and
Mrs. White, and--
ALL
Get on
with it!!!
WADSWORTH
I'm getting there, I'm getting there!!
And Mr. Boddy
went to get his surprise packages from the Hall.
And you all opened your
presents,
(he shuts the door)
And Mr. Boddy switched out the
lights!
Wadsworth turns off the lights.
Pause.
Everyone screams.
The
lights are flipped back on.
Wadsworth is lying on the floor, and the
guests,
tired of all this, react with disgust.
The butler opens his
eyes.
WADSWORTH
Mr. Boddy lay on the floor, apparently dead.
PLUM
He was
dead! I examined him!
WADSWORTH
Then why was he bashed on
190
the head a few
minutes later with
a candlestick if he was dead already?
PLUM
All right, I
made a mistake!
WADSWORTH
Right!
But if so, why was Mr. Boddy pretending
to be dead?
(more quietly)
It could only be because he realized his scheme
had misfired,
and the gunshot was intended to kill him, not
me.
Look.
(points at blood on one of Mr. Boddy's ear lobes)
The bullet
grazed h
fa0
is ear. Clearly his best way of escaping death
was to pretend to be
dead already.
PLUM
So whoever grabbed the gun from me in the dark was
trying
to kill HIM!
WADSWORTH
But remember what happened next.
He goes to
the door and picks up the glass from a table.
WADSWORTH
Mrs. Peacock took
a drink.
(points at Prof. Plum)
You said, "Maybe it's poisoned!"
She
screams!
Wadsworth screams in falsetto.
He takes Mrs. Peacock, who
helpfully(?) starts to scream.
The butler sits her down on the
couch.
WADSWORTH
Mr. Green . . .
(Wadsworth slaps Mrs. Peacock)
(he
imitates Mr. Green)
Well . . . I had to stop her screaming . . .
(back to
himself)
Then--more screaming--Yvette--the billiard room!
We all rushed
out!
As they do now.
124 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--BILLIARD ROOM --
124
Wadsworth sits on the pool table.
The guests pool around the
door.
WADSWORTH
But one of us . . . wasn't here.
(nasally
accent)
No.
ALL
(imitating him)
No?
WADSWORTH
(responding in
kind)
No.
Maybe one of us was murdering the cook.
Who wasn't here with
us?
The guests pause.
GREEN
Do you know?
WADSWORTH
(with certainty)
I
do.
(continues at his breathless rate)
While we stood here, trying to stop
Yvette from panicking . . .
He leaves for the study.
124a -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 124a
WADSWORTH
. . . one of us could have stayed in
the study,
picked up the dagger . . .
(he does so)
124b -- INT. GROUND
FLOOR--THE HALL -- 124b
Wadsworth is running down the Hall.
WADSWORTH
.
. . run down the Hall . . .
124c -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN --
124c
WADSWORTH
. . . and stabbed the cook.
He plunges the dagger into a
chicken as the guests arrive
at the door.
PEACOCK
Oh, how could he risk
it?
We might have seen him running back.
Wadsworth goes over to the
freezer and pushes open the back of
the freezer, exposing the kitchen/study
secret passage.
WADSWORTH
Not if they used this secret passage.
Mrs.
Peacock gasps.
WADSWORTH
And the murderer ran back down the secret passage
to the study.
Wadsworth leaves the kitchen for the Hall.
125 -- INT.
GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 125
The butler is going for the
study.
WHITE
(yelling)
Is that where it comes out?
WADSWORTH
(yelling
back)
Yes! Look!
126 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 126
Wadsworth
pushes open the picture.
GREEN
Wha--?
MUSTARD
How did you
know?
WADSWORTH
This house belongs to a friend of mine. I've known all
along.
GREEN
So you could be the murderer.
WADSWORTH
(laughing)
Don't be
ridiculous.
If I was the murderer, why would I reveal to you how I did
it?
The guests nod.
GREEN
Well . . . who else knew about the secret
passage?
SCARLET
(hits Mustard)
We found it. Colonel Mustard and
me.
MUSTARD
You found it. You could have known about it all the
time.
SCARLET
But I didn't!
PEACOCK
Well, why should we believe
you?
WADSWORTH
Because she was with us all in the billiard room doorway
while
Yvette was screaming, don't you remember?
PEACOCK
What I don't
understand is, why was the cook murdered?
She had nothing to do with Mr.
Boddy.
WADSWORTH
Of course she did.
(conspiratorially)
I gathered you all
here together because you were all implicated in
Mr. Boddy's dastardly
blackmail.
Did none of you deduce that the others were involved,
too?
Evidently no one had.
WHITE
What others?
WADSWORTH
The cook. And
Yvette?
ALL
No!
WADSWORTH
That's how he got all his information.
Before
he could blackmail anyone, Mr. Boddy had to discover
their guilty secret.
The cook and Yvette were his accomplices!
MUSTARD
(brightly)
I see!
So . .
. whoever knew . . . that the cook was involved . . . killed
her?
WADSWORTH
Yes.
Col. Mustard looks very happy.
WADSWORTH
I know,
because I was Mr. Boddy's butler,
that the cook had worked for one of
you.
T
190
he guests ask who it was.
WADSWORTH
(to Mrs. White)
You recognized
Yvette, didn't you?
Don't deny it.
WHITE
What do you mean, "don't deny
it"? I'm not denying anything.
WADSWORTH
Another denial!
Mrs. White
sticks her tongue out at Wadsworth.
WHITE
All right, it's true. I knew
Yvette.
My husband had an affair with her, but I didn't care.
I wasn't . .
. jealous.
WADSWO
fa0
RTH
(to Miss Scarlet)
You knew Yvette, too, didn't
you?
SCARLET
Yes. She worked for me.
WADSWORTH
(to Col. Mustard)
And you
also knew her, sir.
We've already established that you were one of Miss
Scarlet's . . .
clients. That's why you were so desperate to get your hands
on
those negatives.
Photographs of you and Yvette in flagrante delicto,
remember?
MUSTARD
Mr. Boddy threatened to send those pictures to my dear
old
mother. The shock would have killed her!
WHITE
Ha. That would have
been quite an achievement since you told
us that she's dead already.
(to
Wadsworth)
So, he had the motive.
WADSWORTH
You all had a
motive.
MUSTARD
But where and when was Mr. Boddy killed?
WADSWORTH
Don't
you see?
(he grabs Mr. Green)
Look, we came back to the study with
Yvette.
Mr. Boddy was on the floor . . .
(Wadsworth trips Mr. Green to the
floor as Mr. Boddy)
. . . pretending to be dead.
But one of us noticed
he's alive.
So. I explained that I was Mr. Boddy's butler,
and I'd invited
you here, and we realized there was only one
other person in the
house.
ALL
The cook!
Wadsworth leaves the guests far behind.
127 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 127
Everyone runs up the Hall to the
kitchen.
128 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--KITCHEN -- 128
The guests enter,
breathless. Mr. Green runs to the freezer, just
like he did before.
But
there's no Wadsworth.
GREEN
Well, where is he?
The freezer door
opens.
Miss Scarlet screams.
Wadsworth, looking quite dead, falls into Mr.
Green's arms.
The exasperated Mr. Green drops the butler on the
floor.
Wadsworth opens his eyes.
WADSWORTH
By now, she was dead. We laid
her down with our backs to the
freezer. One of us slipped through the same
secret passage--
PEACOCK
Again . . . ?
WADSWORTH
Of course! Back to the
study!
They all run out.
129 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY --
129
Wadsworth acts as if he had just entered the study from the
secret
passage.
WADSWORTH
The murderer was in the secret passage.
Meanwhile, Mr.
Boddy . . .
(Wadsworth again throws Mr. Green to the floor)
. . . had been
on the floor. He jumped up . . .
(the butler picks up Mr. Green, then lets
him fall again)
. . . the murderer came out of the secret panel, picked up
the
candlestick . . . .
The butler acts as if he had a candlestick. He
goes after Mr. Green,
who may not be acting his look of panic.
130 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 130
Wadsworth is pursuing a frightened Mr.
Green up the hall,
toward the bathroom.
WADSWORTH
Mr. Boddy followed us
out of the study into the Hall, looking for
an escape.
WADSWORTH
The
murderer crept up behind him and . . . killed him!!
Wadsworth brings his
hand down upon Mr. Green's head.
Mr. Green falls.
GREEN
Will you stop
that!!
WADSWORTH
No.
The butler grabs Mr. Green and proceeds to the
bathroom.
WADSWORTH
Then . . . he threw him into the toilet!
GREEN
No . .
. !
Wadsworth leans against the bathroom door frame,
pretending to check a
watch.
WADSWORTH
And nonchalantly rejoined us beside the cook's body in
the
kitchen. It took less than half a minute.
MUSTARD
So who wasn't there
the entire time in the kitchen?
WADSWORTH
Whoever it was, is the
murderer!
He runs off.
The bathroom door opens and Mr. Green emerges,
drying his hands.
We can hear a toilet flush.
He hands the towel to Col
Mustard.
131 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY -- 131
Wadsworth runs
in.
WADSWORTH
And we put the weapons in the cupboard, locked it, and
ran
to the front door . . .
He runs out, almost colliding with the
just-arrived guests.
132 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 132
Wadsworth
opens the front door and makes as if throwing the key away.
WADSWORTH
To
throw away the key!
(pauses)
The motorist!
I didn't throw the key away--I
put it in my pocket.
And someone could have take
190
n it out of my pocket and
substituted another!
PLUM
We were all in a huddle. Any one of us could
have done that!
WADSWORTH
Precisely.
He slams the front door.
GREEN
Wait
aminute . . .
Colonel Mustard has a top-secret Pentagon job.
Mrs. White's
husband is a nuclear physicist, and . . .
(runs to the billiard room and
points in)
. . . Yvette is a link between them.
PLUM
(
fa0
to Col.
Mustard)
What is your top-secret job, Colonel?
WADSWORTH
I can tell
you.
He's working on the secret of the next fusion bomb.
Mrs. White
gasps.
MUSTARD
How did you know that?
WADSWORTH
(to Mustard)
Can you keep
a secret?
MUSTARD
(leaning in)
Yes.
WADSWORTH
So can I.
PEACOCK
Is this
a plot between them, Wadsworth, or did Colonel Mustard
do it
alone?
WADSWORTH
We shall see.
Let's look at the other murders.
PLUM
Yes.
Bad luck that that motorist arrived at that
moment.
WADSWORTH
(amusedly)
It wasn't luck--I invited him.
WHITE,
SCARLET, and PEACOCK
You did?!
WADSWORTH
Of course. It's obvious. Everyone
here tonight was either Mr. Boddy's
victim or accomplice. Everyone who has
died gave him vital information
about one of you. I got them here so they'd
give evidence against
him and force him to confess.
SCARLET
Oh, yeah? What
about that motorist?
What kind of information did he have?
MUSTARD
(almost
teary)
He was my driver during the war.
Col. Mustard sits in a
chair.
WADSWORTH
And what was he holding over you?
MUSTARD
He knew that I
was a war profiteer.
(pauses)
(continues, painfully)
I stole essential Air
Force radio parts, and I sold them
on the black market. That is how I made
all my money.
But that does not make me a murderer!
PEACOCK
Well, a lot of
our airmen died because their radios didn't work!
Was the policeman working
for Mr. Boddy, too?
SCARLET
The cop was from Washington.
He was on my
payroll. I bribed him once a week so I could
carry on with business. Mr.
Boddy found out somehow . . .
PEACOCK
(revolted)
Oh, my God . .
.
SCARLET
(annoyed)
Oh, please.
GREEN
And . . . the singing telegram
girl?
133 -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--FRONT DOOR--VIEW INSIDE -- 133
The rain
has stopped.
The people open the door and look at the singing telegram
girl's corpse.
PLUM
(quietly)
She was my patient once.
I had an affair
with her.
That's how I lost my license. Mr. Boddy found that out,
too.
(solemn pause)
WADSWORTH
Well . . .
(claps hands together)
Let's put
her in the study with the others.
134 -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE STUDY --
134
The men drop the singing telegram girl's body on the
floor.
WADSWORTH
So. Now you all know why they died.
Whoever killed Mr.
Boddy also wanted his accomplices dead.
PLUM
How did the murderer know
about them all?
I mean, I admit that I had guessed that this young singer
informed
on me to Mr. Boddy . . . but I didn't know anything about any
of
you until this evening.
WADSWORTH
First, the murder needed to get the
weapons. Easy. He stole the
key from my pocket. And then we all followed
Colonel Mustard's
suggestion that we split up and search the
house.
PEACOCK
That's right, it was Colonel Mustard's suggestion!
Col.
Mustard cannot meet their eyes.
WADSWORTH
And one of us got away from his
or her partner and hurried
to the study. On the desk was the envelope from
Mr. Boddy.
It contained photographs and letters--the evidence of Mr.
Boddy's
network of informants.
WHITE
Where is the envelope
now?
WADSWORTH
Gone. Destroyed.
(looks around, then steps to the
fireplace)
Perhaps in the fire . . . .
(throws aside the grate)
The only
possible place.
(pulls out the remnants of the tape made earlier)
Ah
hah!
Then, having found out the whole story, the murderer went to
the
cupboard, unlocked it with the key, took out the
wrench--
SCARLET
(breathless)
Then we found the secret passage from the
conservatory to the
lounge . . . where we found the motorist dead!
135 --
INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- 135
Wadsworth frantically acts out the next
scene.
WADSWORTH
That's right! And we couldn't get in.
So Yvette rain to
the open cupboard,
and shot the door open. BANG!
And then, the doorbell
rang!
The doorbell rings.
Everyone freezes in terror.
PEACOCK
Oh,
whoever it is,
190
they gotta go away, or they'll be killed!
Ohhh!
Mrs.
Peacock opens the front door.
A rather ELDERLY EVANGELIST stands outside,
pamphlets in hand.
EVANGELIST
(kindly)
Good evening.
Have you ever given
any thought to the kingdom of
heaven?
PEACOCK
(stunned)
What?
EVANGELIST
Repent. The kingdom of heaven
IS at hand.
SCARLET
You ain't just whistlin' Dixie.
EVANGELIST
fa0
Armageddon
is almost upon us.
PLUM
I got news for you--it's already here!
Mrs.
Peacock tries to shut the door on him.
PEACOCK
Go away!
EVANGELIST
But
your souls are in danger!
PEACOCK
Our lives our in danger, you
beatnik!
She shuts the door on him, closing several of his pamphlets
inside.
WADSWORTH
(continuing as if nothing had happened)
The cop arrived
next, we locked him in the library.
We forgot the cupboard with the weapons
was now unlocked,
then we split up again, and the murderer switched off the
electricity!
He does so.
Everything goes black.
GREEN (V.O.)
Oh, my
God.
Mrs. White squeals.
PEACOCK (V.O.)
Not again.
SCARLET (V.O.)
(very
annoyed)
Turn on the lights!!!
Wadsworth turns on the lights.
136 -- A
-- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- A -- 136
WADSWORTH
Sorry. Didn't mean to
frighten you.
GREEN
You're a bit late for that!
(to White)
I hate it when
he does that!
She whimpers.
WADSWORTH
Then there were three more
murders.
WHITE
So which of us killed them?
WADSWORTH
None of us killed
Mr. Boddy, or the cook.
GREEN and WHITE
So who did?
WADSWORTH
The one
person who wasn't with us.
The guests try to figure it
out.
WADSWORTH
Yvette.
ALL
Yvette?!
WADSWORTH
She was in the billiard
room, listening to our conversation.
CUT TO
Flashback of Yvette sitting
on the pool table.
The following events transpire as Wadsworth describes
them.
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
She heard the gunshot . . . she thought he was
dead.
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
And while we all examined the bullet hole,
she
crept into the study, picked up the dagger . . .
ran to the kitchen, and
stabbed the cook.
Yvette stabs Mrs. Ho in the back.
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
We
didn't hear the cook scream because Mrs. Peacock was
screaming about the
"poisoned" brandy.
The, Yvette returned to the billiard room.
She screamed
. . . .
And we all ran to her.
CUT TO
Present, the hall.
MUSTARD
Well,
when did she kill Mr. Boddy?
WADSWORTH
When I said.
We all ran to the
kitchen to see the cook.
Yvette hid in the study to check that Mr. Boddy
was dead.
CUT TO
Flashback of Yvette hiding behind a chair in the
lounge.
The following events transpire as Wadsworth descries
them.
WADSWORTH
He got up, and followed them down the hall,
so she hit him
on the head with a candlestick,
and dragged him to the toilet.
CUT TO
The
present, in the Hall.
SCARLET
Why?
WADSWORTH
To create
confusion!
PEACOCK
It worked.
Col. Mustard nods.
PLUM
Why did she do
it?
WADSWORTH
Was it because she was acting under orders?
From the person
who later killed
her.
PLUM
Who?!
PEACOCK
Who?!
SCARLET
Who?!
WADSWORTH
Was it one of her
clients?
(turns to Col. Mustard)
Or was it a jealous wife?
(turns to Mrs.
White)
Or an adulterous doctor?
(turns to Prof. Plum)
No.
It was her
employer, Miss Scarlet.
SCARLET
That's a lie!!
WADSWORTH
Is it?
You used
her, the way you always used her.
You killed the motorist when we split up
to search the house.
SCARLET
How could I have known about the secret
passage?
WADSWORTH
Easy. Yvette told you.
So when we split up again . .
.
CUT TO
Miss Scarlet, gloved, turning off the electricity.
WADSWORTH
(V.O.)
. . . you switched off the electricity.
It was easy for you, here
on the ground floor.
Then, in the dark, you got the lead pipe and the
rope,
strangled Yvette, ran to the library, killed the cop,
picked up the
gun where Yvette dropped it, opened the front door,
recognized the singing
telegram from her photograph, and shot her.
CUT TO
Present, the
Hall.
SCARLET
You've no proof.
WADSWORTH
The gun is missing.
Gentlemen,
turn out your pockets.
Ladies, empty your purses.
Whoever has the gun is
the murderer.
They all do so.
Suddenly, Miss Scarlet pulls out the
revolver.
She points it at him.
SCARLET
(impr
190
essed)
Brilliantly worked
out, Wadsworth. I congratulate you.
He shrugs off the praise.
Miss
Scarlet starts to slowly make her way to the front door.
MUSTARD
(very
impressed)
Me too!
SCARLET
(to Mustard)
Shut up!!
GREEN
Now, there's one
thing I don't understand.
PLUM
ONE thing?
GREEN
Why did you do it?
Half
of Washington knows what kind of business you run.
You
fa0
were in no real
danger. The whole town would be implicated
if you were exposed.
SCARLET
I
don't think they know my real business.
My business is secrets. Yvette
found them out for me.
The secrets of Senator Peacock's defense
committee,
of Colonel Mustard's fusion bomb, Professor Plum's U.N.
contacts,
and the work of your husband,
(walks to Mrs. White)
the nuclear
physicist.
GREEN
So. It IS political. You're a communist!
SCARLET
No, Mr.
Green. Communism is just a red herring.
Like all members of the oldest
profession, I'm a capitalist.
And I'm gonna sell my secrets--your
secrets--to the highest bidder.
MUSTARD
And what if we don't
cooperate?
SCARLET
You will.
Or I'll expose you.
PLUM
We could expose
you. Six murders . . . ?
SCARLET
I hardly think it will enhance your
reputation at the U.N.,
Professor Plum, if it's revealed that you have been
implicated
not only in adultery with one of your patients, but in her
death.
(she lowers the revolver at him)
And the deaths of five other
people?
PLUM
You don't know what kind of people they have at the U.N.
I
might go up in their estimation.
Col. Mustard starts toward Miss
Scarlet.
She brings the revolver around to bear on him.
MUSTARD
It is no
good blackmailing me, madam.
I have no more money!
The guests agree,
claiming the same thing.
SCARLET
(to Mustard)
I know, sweetie pie.
But you
can pay me in government information.
(she waves the revolver around)
All
of you.
She pauses, then walks to Wadsworth.
She points the revolver at
him.
SCARLET
Except you, Wadsworth.
You, as a mere butler, have no access
to government secrets.
(she cocks the gun)
So I'm afraid your moment has
come.
WADSWORTH
No so fast, Miss Scarlet.
I do have a secret or
two.
SCARLET
Oh yeah? Such as?
WADSWORTH
The games up, Scarlet.
There are
no more bullets left in that gun.
SCARLET
Oh, come on, you don't think I'm
gonna fall for that old trick?
WADSWORTH
It's not a trick. There was one
shot at Mr. Boddy in the study.
Two for the chandelier, two at the lounge
door, and
one for the singing telegram.
SCARLET
That's not
six.
WADSWORTH
One plus two plus two plus one.
She thinks.
SCARLET
Uh,
uh.
There was only one shot that got the chandelier.
That's one plus two
plus ONE plus one.
WADSWORTH
Even if you are right, that would be one plus
one plus two plus one, not
one plus TWO plus one plus
one.
SCARLET
(thinking)
Okay, fine.
One plus two plus one--
(angered)
Shut
up!
Point is, there's one bullet left in this gun,
and guess who's going to
get it?
The doorbell rings.
Scarlet is distracted by it.
Wadsworth turns
her arm around,
taking the gun and forcing her to kneel on the floor.
Mr.
Green runs for the door and opens it.
Cops pour in.
Mr. Green cowers by
the closet in the foyer.
MUSTARD
(hands held up, smiling)
I'm only a
guest!
WADSWORTH
(Holding Scarlet)
Where's the chief?
The Elderly
Evangelist--the CHIEF--walks in, gun in hand.
CHIEF
Ah, Wadsworth, well
done.
(to Scarlet)
I did warn you, my dear. Mr. Hoover is an expert on
Armageddon.
Scarlet is pulled to her feet.
SCARLET
(to
Wadsworth)
Wadsworth, don't hate me for trying to shoot you . .
.
WADSWORTH
Frankly, Scarlet, I don't give a damn.
As I was trying to tell
you, there are no bullets left in this gun.
You see?
He pulls the trigger,
firing the sixth bullet through the rope of the
second
chandelier.
Wadsworth is perplexed.
Scarlet shrugs,
embarrassed.
WADSWORTH
(quietly)
One plus two . . . plus one . . .
The
camera reveals Col. Mustard.
MUSTARD
(counting on his fingers)
. . .plus
two, plus one . . . is--
And the chandelier shatters on the floor in back
of him.
The camera freezes.
CUT TO
A card, saying
THAT"S WHAT COULD
HAVE HAPPENED.
then another one,
BUT HOW ABOUT THIS?
CUT TO
137 -- B
190
-- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- B -- 137
Wadsworth has just turnedon
the lights,
like at the beginning of ending A.
WADSWORTH
(breathless)
In
the dark, the murderer ran across the hall to the study,
picked up the
rope, and the lead pipe. Ran to the billiard room.
Strangled Yvette . .
.
(he demonstrates on Mr. White)
. . . ran to library, hit the cop on the
head with the lead
fa0
pipe.
Then, coming out of the library, the doorbell
rang--it was the singing
telegram. The murderer picked up the gun where
Yvette dropped it,
ran to the door, opened it, recognized the girl from her
picture, shot her,
and ran back to the cellar!
ALL
The
cellar!
WADSWORTH
Yes.
PEACOCK
But Colonel Mustard wasn't in the
cellar.
WADSWORTH
No. But you were.
PEACOCK
So.
WADSWORTH
You murdered
them all.
You were the person who was missing when the cook and
Mr. Boddy
were murdered. And the cook used to be your cook!
Don't you remember your
fatal mistake?
You told us at dinner that we were eating one of your
favorite recipes.
And monkey's brains, though popular in Cantonese cuisine,
are not
often to be found in Washington, D.C.
GREEN
Is that what we
ate?
He covers his mouth and runs for the bathroom.
PEACOCK
Why would I
have murdered all of the others?
WADSWORTH
Obviously, in case Mr. Boddy
had told them about you.
PLUM
So it has all nothing to do with the
disappearing nuclear physicist
and Colonel Mustard's work on the new fusion
bomb.
WADSWORTH
(grinning)
No. Communism was just a red herring.
Mrs.
Peacock did it all.
PEACOCK
There's no proof.
WADSWORTH
Well. The gun is
missing.
Gentlemen, turn out your pockets.
Ladies, empty your purses.
(the
camera reveals Miss Scarlet's empty purse)
Whoever has the gun, is the
murderer.
Mrs. Peacock opens her purse and pulls out the gun,
pointing it
at the butler.
PEACOCK
Very well.
(pause)
What do you propose to do about
it?
She makes her way to the front
door.
WADSWORTH
Nothing.
PEACOCK
Nothing.
WADSWORTH
Nothing at all.
I
don't approve of murder.
But it seems to me that you've done the world a
service by
ridding it of an appalling blackmailer and his
disgusting
informers.
GREEN
But the police will be here any minute. What
happens then?
WADSWORTH
Why should the police come?
Nobody's called
them.
Everyone is shocked.
PEACOCK
You mean . .
.
WADSWORTH
(smiling)
That's right.
Now, I suggest that we stack the
bodies in the cellar,
lock it, leave quietly, one at a time, and pretend
than none of this
has ever happened.
PEACOCK
Great idea!
I'll leave first
. . .
(sarcastic)
. . . if you don't mind.
Mrs. Peacock uses the gun to
wave the other guests into a group.
WADSWORTH
Be my guest.
In fact, I
think we all owe you a vote of thanks.
He starts singing in an appealing
baritone.
WADSWORTH
"For she's a jolly good fellow,
for she's a jolly good
fellow . . ."
The rest of guests start to sing as well.
Mrs. White takes a
harmony.
Mrs. Peacock carefully slips out the door.
As soon as the door
shuts, the party stops singing.
They relax somewhat--at least the immediate
danger is past.
GREEN
(accusatory)
I TOLD you I didn't DO it!
MUSTARD
But
what if the authorities find out what happened?
WADSWORTH
The F.B.I. will
take care of that.
MUSTARD
You mean . . . ?
WADSWORTH
My phone call from
Mr. Hoover?
I work for him, of course.
How else could I have known
everything about you all?
MUSTARD
There's still one thing I don't
understand.
WHITE
ONE thing?
MUSTARD
Who was Mrs. Peacock taking bribes
from?
WADSWORTH
A foreign power.
Her husband, the senator, has influence
over defense contracts.
PLUM
Is there going to be a
coverup?
WADSWORTH
Isn't that in the public interest?
What could be gained
by exposure?
PLUM
But is the F.B.I. in the habit of cleaning up after
multiple murder?
WADSWORTH
Yes.
Why do you think it's run by a man called
"Hoover"?
138 -- B -- EXT. HILL HOUSE--DRIVEWAY -- B -- 138
Mrs. Peacock
has her keys out and is getting ready to get into
her car.
The elderly
evangelist steps out onto the driveway.
EVANGELIST
Oh, Mrs. Peacock . . .
?
PEACOCK
(cautiously)
How did you know my name?
EVANGELIST
The kingdom
of heaven IS a
190
t hand.
He whips out agun and points it at
her.
Floodlights engage and cops pour out of the yard.
EVANGELIST (CHIEF)
(O.S.)
Okay, take her away!
PEACOCK (O.S.)
Take your hands off me! I'm a
senator's wife!
The front door opens and the guests, with Wadsworth at
their head,
pour out on to the porch.
CHIEF
Wadsworth, we got
her.
WADSWORTH
You see?
Like the Mounties, we
fa0
always get our
man.
GREEN
Mrs. Peacock was a man?!
Wadsworth slaps him, then Col.
Mustard does the same.
WADSWORTH
Would anyone care for fruit or . . .
desert?
The camera freezes.
CUT TO
A card, reading
BUT HERE'S WHAT
REALLY HAPPENED . . .
CUT TO
139 -- C -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL --
C -- 139
Wadsworth switches on the lights, like in the other two
endings.
WADSWORTH
Sorry, didn't mean to frighten anyone.
GREEN
You're a
bit late for that!!
WADSWORTH
Then, there were three more murders.
ALL
So
who did it!?
Wadsworth starts striding away.
WADSWORTH
Let's consider
each murder one by one.
Professor Plum, you knew that Mr. Boddy was still
alive.
Even psychiatrists can tell the difference between patients who
are
alive or dead.
You fired the gun at him in the dark and missed, so
you
pretended he was dead. That's how you were able to kill him
later,
unobserved.
SCARLET
That's right!
He was the missing person in the
kitchen after we found the cook dead!
GREEN
But he was with us in the
billiard room when we found Yvette screaming.
If that's when the cook was
killed, how did he do it?
PLUM
I didn't!!
PEACOCK
You don't expect us to
believe that, do you?
WADSWORTH
I expect you to believe it.
You killed the
cook.
She used to be your cook, and she informed on you to Mr. Boddy.
140
-- C -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--DINING ROOM -- C -- 140
Wadsworth enters.
The
guests stay around the door from the Hall.
WADSWORTH
You made one fatal
mistake!
He sits in the spot Mrs. Peacock occupied during
dinner.
WADSWORTH
Sitting here, at dinner, Mrs. Peacock told us that she
was
eating one of her favorite recipes.
(he stands slowly)
And monkey's
brains, though popular in Cantonese cuisine, are
not often to be found in
Washington, D.C.
141 -- C -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- C -- 141
The
party reenters the Hall from the dining room.
WADSWORTH
Colonel Mustard,
when we saw the motorist at the front door . . .
CUT TO
A flashback, the
inside of their huddle when the Motorist arrived.
The following happen as
Wadsworth describes them.
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
. . . you took the key to the
weapons cupboard out of my pocket.
Then you suggested that we all split
up.
You separated from Miss Scarlet, crossed the Hall,
opened the cupboard,
took the wrench, ran to the conservatory,
entered the lounge through the
secret passage,
killed the motorist with a blow on the head.
CUT TO
142
-- C -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE LOUNGE -- C -- 142
The present, in the
lounge.
WADSWORTH
(acting out the murder)
Like that!
He strides into the
Hall.
143 -- C -- INT. GROUND FLOOR--THE HALL -- C -- 143
WHITE
(to
Wadsworth)
This is incredible!
WADSWORTH
Not so incredible as what
happened next!
He starts up the stairs.
WADSWORTH
After we all split up
again,
I went upstairs with you, yes, you, Mrs. White!
The butler stops on
the landing.
WADSWORTH
And, while I was in the master bedroom . . .
CUT
TO
Flashback of Mrs. White hurrying downstairs.
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
You
hurried downstairs and turned off the electricity,
got the rope from the
open cupboard, and throttled Yvette.
CUT TO
The present, in the
Hall.
WADSWORTH
(to Mrs. White)
You WERE jealous that your husband was
schtuping Yvette.
That's why you killed him, too!
WHITE
(detached)
Yes . .
.
(pause)
Yes, I did it.
I killed Yvette.
I hated her . . . so . . . much .
. .
I-It-It--flame--flames . . . on the side of my face . . .
breathing . .
. breathle--heaving breaths . . .heaving--
WADSWORTH
(cutting her
off)
While you were in the billiard room,
CUT TO
Flashback, the events
occurring as the butler describes them
WADSWORTH (V.O.)
Miss Scarlet
seized the opportunity and, under cover of darkness,
got to the library,
where she hit the cop, whom she'd been bribing,
on t
190
he head with the lead
pipe!
CUT TO
The present, in the Hall.
WADSWORTH
(to Miss Scarlet)
True
or false?
SCARLET
(amazed)
True!
Who are you, Perry Mason?
PLUM
So it
must have been Mr. Green who shot the singing telegram!
GREEN
I didn't do
it!
MUSTARD
Well, there's nobody else left.
GREEN
But I didn't do
it!
(pauses, realizing something)
The gun is missing!
W
fa3
hoever's got the
gun, shot the girl!
Wadsworth pulls the gun from his pocket.
WADSWORTH
I
shot her.
ALL but GREEN
You?!
GREEN
(knowingly)
So it was you.
I was
going to expose you.
WADSWORTH
(to Mr. Green)
I know.
So I choose to
expose myself.
MUSTARD
Please, there are ladies present!
WADSWORTH
(to
All)
You thought Mr. Boddy was dead.
But why? None of you even met him
until tonight.
Mr. Green understands.
GREEN
You're Mr. Boddy!
Wadsworth
grins and starts to chuckle evilly.
PLUM
Wait a minute!
(he runs to the
study door)
So who did I kill?
Wadsworth shrugs.
WADSWORTH
My
butler.
PLUM
Shucks.
Wadsworth uses the revolver to wave the Professor to
join the group.
WADSWORTH
He was expendable, like all of you.
I'm grateful
to you all for disposing of my network of spies and informers.
Saved me a
lot of trouble.
Now there's no evidence against me.
WHITE
This all has
nothing to do with my disappearing nuclear physicist husband
or Colonel
Mustard's work with the new top-secret fusion
bomb.
WADSWORTH
(laughing)
No. Communism was just a red . . .
herring.
Wadsworth runs to the front door,
keeping the revolver trained on
the party.
GREEN
But, the police will be here any minute!
You'll never get
away with this, any of you!
WADSWORTH
Why should the police come?
Nobody's
called them.
PEACOCK
You mean . . . oh, my God, of course!
WADSWORTH
So
why shouldn't we get away with it?
We'll stack the bodies in the cellar,
lock it, leave quietly
one at a time, and forget that any of this ever
happened.
Mr. Green takes off his glasses and starts to put them in
his
jacket's inside pocket.
GREEN
And you'll just go on blackmailing us
all.
WADSWORTH
Of course.
Why not?
GREEN
Well, I'll tell you why not.
He
whips a pistol from his jacket and fires.
Wadsworth tries to get off a
shot but is far too slow.
The butler is hit.
WADSWORTH
(shocked)
Good
shot, Green.
Wadsworth slides down the closet door to the floor.
He looks
at the blood flowing out of his chest.
WADSWORTH
Very good . .
.
Wadsworth dies.
Mr. Green stands fully, lowering the pistol.
He already
looks more confident than he has yet during the night.
Mrs. White steps up
to him.
He points the pistol at her.
WHITE
Are you a cop?
GREEN
No, I'm a
plant.
SCARLET
A plant? I thought men like you were usually called a
"fruit."
GREEN
Very funny.
(he pulls out a badge)
F.B.I. That phone call
from J. Edgar Hoover was for me.
He steps up to the front door and grabs
the handle.
GREEN
I told you I didn't do it!
He opens the front
door.
Cops pour in.
The elderly evangelist (the chief) follows them
in.
CHIEF
All right. Whodunit?
The guests all try to explain, blaming
each other.
The cops, confused, keep pointing their guns at different
guests.
Mr. Green shouts above the din.
GREEN
They all did it!
But if you
want to know who killed Mr. Boddy,
I did. In the Hall, with the
revolver.
Take 'em away, chief.
I'm going to go home and sleep with my
wife.
The camera freezes as Mr. Green turns to leave and he and the chief
grin.
THE END
Closing credits start to roll to
the tune of "Shake, Rattle and Roll."
MRS. PEACOCK......................................EILEEN BRENNAN
WADSWORTH............................................TIM CURRY
MRS. WHITE.........................................MADELINE KAHN
PROF. PLUM.......................................CHRISTOPER LLOYD
MR. GREEN..........................................MICHAEL McKEAN
COL. MUSTARD........................................MARTIN MULL
MISS SCARLET......................................LESLEY ANN WARREN
YVETTE..............................................COLLEEN CAMP
MR. BODDY..............................................LEE VING
Transcript completed 7:3
144
7 p.m., Wednesday, May 10, 1995.
--Jack
Witzig
This script was found in INFlow. It was
shameless taken off from somewhere else, may god, copyright owners and
people who worked hard and were not credited forgive us.
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