Alone Again, Natura-Diddly                       Written by Ian Maxtone-Graham
                                                       Directed by Jim Reardon
==============================================================================
Production code: BABF10                   Original Airdate on FOX: 13-Feb-2000
Capsule revision A (9-Nov-2000)
==============================================================================
> "TV Guide" Synopsis
==============================================================================
   [From "TV Guide 'Close-Up'"] Springfieldians mourn the untimely death of
   one of their own, a tragedy that occurred at the new auto-racing venue.
   And Homer, a pivotal figure in the tragic incident, assists in consoling
   the grief-stricken.  [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]  {mar}

==============================================================================
> Title sequence
==============================================================================
Blackboard:     MY SUSPENSION WAS / NOT "MUTUAL"

Couch:          The family rides into the living room in bumper cars.  Marge
                (with Maggie), Bart, and Lisa all converge on Homer, bumping
                him into the back wall.

==============================================================================
> Did You Notice...
==============================================================================
   ... Flanders pedaled the swan-boat all the way to his driveway?  [{ddg}
       adds, "and neither of the Simpson cars were in it?"]

Robert Carter:
   ... Marge didn't seem to mind Homer's raunchy behavior?
   ... Dr. Marvin Monroe's grave has a therapy couch on it?
   ... How Rod and Todd ran away when Ned declared he wasn't going to church?
   ... Lenny would rather listen to the lyrics than stare at the gorgeous
       country singer?

Don Del Grande:
   ... the car sponsors included Duff Beer, Buzz Cola, and KBBL?
   ... KBBL is "talk radio"?  (What happened to Bill and Marty?)
   ... apparently, Homer walked back to wherever he left his car when they
       started their hike, so he could drive his car there?
   ... Homer managed to get into the mailbox, despite the fact that he
       couldn't get out?

Daniel L. Dreibelbis:
   ... Homer is afraid of bees on his crotch?
   ... it appears that Cletus and Brandine are brother and sister?
   ... this is only the second time we've heard Mrs. Hibbert speak in the
       entire series?
   ... Moe had found a rather novel way to commit suicide?
   ... Luanne didn't speak and she's still with her American Gladiator
       boyfriend?
   ... Milhouse was missing from the funeral?
   ... Homer's bear slippers?
   ... Homer's video equipment was most likely all borrowed from Flanders?
   ... Rod and Todd have a television in their room to play Nintendo? (unless
       Flanders rigged up an older computer monitor so that they wouldn't be
       tempted to watch secular programming)
   ... the first date Ned went on looked awfully familiar (wasn't she the
       Mensa woman from "They Saved Lisa's Brain"?)  [I thought she was the
       OmniTouch lady -- Ed.]
   ... Ned no longer appears to have his Geo?
   ... Ned parked his car in Rev. Lovejoy's personal parking space?

Curtis Gibby:
   ... the first car to almost hit OFF as they crossed the track was Clay
       Babcock's (#42)?
   ... the Bible Blaster zaps people with white bibles?  (At first I thought
       they were playing cards.)
   ... it's exactly 4:00 when Homer shows Ned the dating video?
   ... that Ned perks up when Rachel points at him during the song?

Joe Green:
   ... the Squishee logo on the Duff race car?
   ... one of the race cars looks like Richard Petty's?
   ... "My 1st Video Editor"?

Richard E. Green:
   ... ALL of the billboards say KBBL on them!
   ... Homer drives into the pit area at 1:50
   ... from the looks of it, Bleeding Gums and Bea's graves are still visited,
       because of the flowers there (undoubtedly left by Lisa and Abe), and
       Grime's grave is rotting.
   ... I think this is the first time we've seen McAllister without a hat?
   ... in Ned's bedroom there are a number of photos of this woman ... and she
       doesn't look too much like Maude.
   ... Helen Lovejoy was not in this episode AT ALL?  Oh, and don't give me
       the "Maggie Roswell" excuse; I saw Luanne and Hoover in this week's
       episode!

Tony Hill:
   ... Clay's wife is nursing in the race car?
   ... Cletus's parents have a goat on the roof?
   ... the funeral T-shirts say "Let 'Er R.I.P."?
   ... Wiggum is parked in front of a fire hydrant?
   ... Ned is parishioner of the month?

Darrel Jones:
   ... the initials on the tree are "S.H. and B.D."?

Joe Klemm:
   ... Maggie riding with Marge in the bumper car couch gag?
   ... when we first see the family hiking, Maggie is in the picnic basket?
   ... all the tombstones of characters that have died in the Simpsons
       universe during the show's run?
   ... the way Maude's casket resembles a race car?
   ... the star wipe when Lisa says she wants her name out of Homer's video
       about Ned?

Haynes Lee:
   ... Homer is uncharacteristically obese?
   ... Dr. Hibbert didn't chuckle before Maude died?
   ... Captain McAllister was not smoking his pipe?

Andrew Levine:
   ... judging from the pixelization in the video, Ned is *very* well endowed?
       (He wasn't kidding when he said foot-long hot dogs made him uneasy!)
       [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.]
   ... the "rescued souls" in the videogame have halos over their heads?

Patrick McGovern:
   ... "I'm Too Sexy" plays in the background of Ned's dating video?

Jerry P:
   ... the pit crew had fuzzy dice prepared to be swapped?
   ... the stands are crowded in most places, but empty around Lenny?
   ... Ned doesn't close his car's door?
   ... Ned pushes up his glasses when they aren't down?
   ... Rachel Jordan almost puts her hand on Ned's shoulder?

Benjamin Robinson:
   ... the "Simpsons" tradition of dark clouds at a funeral continues?
   ... Homer never blabbed about Ned and his misadventures in Las Vegas?
   ... the rest of Kovenant doesn't help Rachel load gear into the van?

David Sibley:
   ... Ned went to sleep with his glasses on the first time he was in bed?

Jim Terzis:
   ... Homer's immensely large "Ned War Rock"?
   ... the swan parked in the driveway?
   ... the man in the back of the restaurant looked a lot like Frank Grimes?
   ... Bea Simmons' tombstone had "Grampa's Girlfriend" pointed out on it?

Javier Vera:
   ... we finally read what was written on BG Murphy's grave?
   ... we finally get to see Dr. Monroe's grave?

==============================================================================
> Voice Credits
==============================================================================
- Starring
   - Dan Castellaneta (Homer, Clay Babcock [?], Willie)
   - Julie Kavner (Marge)
   - Nancy Cartwright (Bart, Todd, Ralph)
   - Yeardley Smith (Lisa)
   - Hank Azaria (Cletus, Bumblebee Man, Moe, Chief Wiggum, Frink, Apu, Kirk,
        Pyro, Videogame Announcer, Carl)
   - Harry Shearer (Ned Flanders, Track Announcer, Crew Chief, Dr. Hibbert,
        Lenny, Lovejoy, McAllister, Skinner)

- Special Guest Voice
   - Shawn Colvin (Rachel Jordan)
   - Marcia Wallace (Edna Krabappel)
   - Frank Welker (Parrot)

- Also Starring
   - Pamela Hayden (Rod)
   - Tress MacNeille (Agnes Skinner, Mrs. Babcock, Brandine, Mrs. Hibbert,
        Dating Service Clerk, Wharton Lady)
   - Marcia Mitzman-Gaven (Maude Flanders, Fan-demonium Girl, Diane)

==============================================================================
> Movie (and other) references
==============================================================================
   + "Alone Again, Naturally" (song)
      - title of episode a spoof of this Gilbert O'Sullivan song

   ~ Douglas Adams "The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy" (book)  {hl}
      - race car prominently displays the number 42.

   + NASCAR "Ride Along" commercials  {ddg}
      - driver's wife/baby in the car

   - "Beverly Hillbillies" (TV series)  {dj}
      - Brandine's parents rocking on top of the pickup truck

   + "Hee-Haw" (TV series)
      - a banjo riff is played after a quick joke

   + IRL accidents  {em}
      - debris [including a tire at one running of the Indy 500 -- Ed.] has
        flown into the stands, unfortunately killing people  [See "Comments"
        section for more -- Ed.]

   ~ Nintendo video game commercial  {hl}
      - fat shirtless fan in the stands.

   - "The Naked Gun" (movie)
      - Maude dies in a similar manner to Ricardo Montalban's character,
        getting knocked over the guardrail of a stadium into the parking lot
        {al}
      - the shot of the crowd around Maude's body  {dj}

   + Rat Fink cartoons  {jg2}
      - character on "Let 'Er R.I.P." shirt similar in style

   + STP (motor oil treatment)  {bjr}
      - Maude's coffin sponsored by "SPT"

   + AC Delco (auto parts maker)  {bjr}
      - "AC DeeCee" another sponsor

   + Quaker State (motor oil)  {bjr}
      - "Quakker State" another sponsor

   + Winston Cup (NASCAR racing series)  {bjr}
      - "Laramie Cup" also a sponsor

   + Budweiser (beer maker)  {bjr}
      - Maude's send-off brought to you by "Budwrench"

   - "Lethal Enforcers" (video game)  {ddg}
      - Character shouts, "Reload!"

   + "Super Noah's Ark" (unlicensed Super Nintendo game)  {jk}
      - first-person shooter done in a religious style

   - "Math Blaster" (video game)  {cg}
      - "Bible Blaster" had similar title and cover graphics

   ~ "Chasing Amy" (movie)  {jg}
      - Homer and Ned having a conversation while sitting on swings, similar
        to Ben Affleck and Joey Lauren Adams

   + My First Sony (children's electronics)  {jc}
      - Lisa's My 1st Video Editor

   + Testament (heavy metal band)  {jg}
      - Kovenant's logo is similar

   + Metallica (heavy metal band)  {jg}
      - "Satanica"

   - Shania Twain (country crossover singer)  {kw}
      - Shawn Colvin's character resembles her

   + Monsters of Rock (rock tour)  {bjr}
      - Kovenant tours with "Monsters of Christian Rock"

==============================================================================
> Previous episode references
==============================================================================
- [7F15] Homer plays matchmaker  {jc}
- [7F17] Grim Reaper claims Bea Simmons
- [7F23], [4F07] Flanders hits hard times  {jc}
- [8F18] Ned takes his shirt off  {jg}
- [8F19] A man is inspired by a female singer he develops romantic feelings
         for  {dj}
- [8F24], [3F22] Bumper cars seen  {bjr}
- [9F01] Shocking family members by deciding not to go to church  {jc}
- [9F11], [3F22] Bumper cars  {jg}
- [1F17] Farmer Homer's Sweet Sweet sugar (cf. "pickup truck full of sweet
         sweet love" line in Rachel's song)  {cg}
- [1F18] Marge's fascination with potatoes  {nd}
- [2F01] A bird sanctuary  {jg}
- [2F05], [5F01] A sporting event ends in tragedy  {jg}
- [2F06] Sweet sweet candy (or can) (cf. "pickup truck full of sweet sweet
         love" line in Rachel's song)  {cg}
- [2F20] Dr. Monroe declared dead  {bjr}
- [2F32] Bleeding Gums Murphy dies
- [3F06] Moe chasing after a newly-widowed woman, or talking about it  {th}
- [3F07] Tupac Shakur is mentioned  {jg}
- [3F14] OFF watches cars race  {dj}
- [3F21] Homer get shot at with a standard cannon  {am}
- [3F23] Lisa walks through a forest  {dj}
- [3F31] Dr. Marvin Monroe confirmed dead  {th}
- [4F04] the Van Houten divorce  {kw}
- [4F04] Homer tries to soothe someone to sleep with white noise (He's better
         at it this time around, too)  {bjr}
- [4F07] Ned is encouraged to unleash his anger  {jg}
- [4F09] Shot of Skinner and Krabappel over dinner in her apartment (cf. the
         shot of Ned and Krabappel)  {cg}
- [4F19] Frank Grimes dies
- [4F24] "Show me your [slang term for breasts]"  {jg}
- [5F04] Apu's marriage  {kw}
- [5F14] Footage of Ned paying bills looks like it was recycled from this
         episode (It's a Maxtone-Graham episode, too)  {bjr}
- [5F18] Outdoor sex  {jg}
- [AABF06] Ned and Homer marry Vegas cocktail waitresses
- [AABF13] Homer [indirectly] causes someone to die  {jg}
- [AABF18] Mensa woman  {reg}
- [AABF19] Homer uses a squeeze ketchup bottle as paint?  {cg}
- [BABF03] Apu's octuplets  {kw}

==============================================================================
> Freeze frame fun
==============================================================================
- Nature preserve sign  {bjr}

      SPRINGFIELD
    NATURE PRESERVE

     OUTDOOR SEX
    BY PERMIT ONLY

- Can of bee repellent  {bjr}

        BEE-GONE

      [choking bee]

    AFRICAN STRENGTH

- Sponsor signs alongside the racetrack  {bjr}

    In order of appearance, from right to left.

     K B B L
    TALK RADIO

    Duff
    BEER

    KRUSTYBURGER  [actually, the Krustyburger logo]

    BUZZ
    COLA

     Laramie
    CIGARETTES

    KWIK-E-MART

- People at the auto race  {reg}
   - OFF, the Flandereses, Sarcastic Middle-aged Man, Chalmers, Willie, Ms
     Hoover, Nelson, Ron Howard (!), Apu, Manjula, Jasper, Krusty, Ruth, Moe,
     Barney, Carl, Skinner, Edna, Smithers, Burns, Kirk, Allison Taylor! (on
     the frame with the cheerleader's backs facing the audience, look directly
     up from Smithers), Wendel, Squeaky-voiced Teen, Bumblebee Man, Hibbert &
     Wife, Larry, Lenny, Clancy, Ralph, Sam

- Cars in the crash that Homer causes  {cg}
   - Numbers 7, 88, 9, 23, and 6

- At the ol' boneyard  {bjr}

    [sax with wings]    [psychiatrists' couch]

        BLEEDING          DR. MARVIN MONROE
          GUMS
         MURPHY


     BEATRICE        FRANK
     SIMMONS        "GRIMEY"
                     GRIMES
    (GRAMPA'S
     GIRFRIEND)

- People at the funeral  {reg}
   - OFF, Captain McAllister, Willy, Apu, Jasper, Pyro, Luanne, Frink,
     Sideshow Mel, Manjula, Flandereses

- Stickers on the coffin  {bjr}

    SPT          LARAMIE CUP

    AC DEECEE    BUDWRENCH

    QUAKKER      FIRESTONE   Duff
     STATE

    [The "F" in "Firestone" is missing its lower crossbar,
     so it looks a bit like a square "r" or upside down "L".]

- Funeral T-shirts  {bjr}

     LET 'ER

    [cartoon ]
    [skeleton]

     R. I. P.

- Additional people at the reception  {reg}
   - Lenny, Carl, the retired guy from 9F05, Hibbert & Wife, Moe

- Videogame  {bjr}

    BILLY GRAHAM'S

        BIBLE
       BLASTER

- Tapes of Flanders  {bjr}

    FLANDERS -- YARD
    FLANDERS -- FROLICKING
    FLANDERS -- 59TH BIRTHDAY

- Lisa's video editor  {bjr}

          MY 1ST
    VIDEO EDITOR

- Ned plays Scrabble (tm)  {bjr}

           H
           O
         FOREVER
      A  L N
    SOLITARY
      O  N
      N  S
      E  W
         E
         R
         E
         D

- Ned's dating tape  {bjr}

    NED'S DATING TAPE

    [Well, what were you expecting? -- Ed.]

- sign in the church parking lot  {cg}

    RESERVED FOR
     PARISHONER
    OF THE MONTH
    +-----------+
    |N. FLANDERS|
    +-----------+

- Bumper sticker on van  {bjr}

    IF THIS VAN'S A-SWAYIN,
     I'M IN HERE A-PRAYIN!

==============================================================================
> Animation, continuity, and other goofs
==============================================================================
=  In the opening scene, Maggie is not wearing her bow at first, but then it
   appears.  {ddg}

*  The sounds of the cars at the racetrack were not Stock Cars, but rather
   Indy-type cars.  {dt}

c  When Bart says, "It's a racetrack," the closed-captioning reads, "It's a
   miracle."  {bjr}

*  I can picture Homer crossing a racetrack with traffic on it, but the rest
   of the family?  {bjr}

=  From the interior of Clay Babcock's car, we see only advertisements for
   KBBL and Buzz, but there are a bunch of other ads that are seen from
   outside the car.  {cg}

=  When the car Bart was in finished its time trial, it was going in the
   opposite direction than when it began.  {ddg}

=  In the scenes where they showed the entire track, the cars were going much
   too fast; even on a "short track", they have to slow down to make it around
   the turns.  {ddg}

*  Three of the cars said "Garden Blast" on them ... how often is it that
   three cars are sponsored by the same company?  {reg}

=  When Homer drives into the pit area, first he has a watch, then he doesn't!
   (It appears again in  act 2, scene 1.)  {reg}

=  Kudos to the animators for actually drawing the dice CORRECTLY (they've
   messed up the sides in previous episodes).  {reg}

=  At the announcement for "something for the men" Maude doesn't have lipstick
   on.  {reg}

c  Dr. Hibbert points out the T-shirt picture of "a Ford urinating on a
   Chevy."  The closed captioning has it the other way around.  Maybe someone
   on the staff is a Ford partisan?  {bjr}

*  Maude got the hot dogs awfully fast.  {jp}

=  Squeaky-voiced Teen can be seen both next to Moe and next to the Wiggums.
   {reg}

*  How did Dr. Hibbert, Luanne Van Houten, Otto & Apu get so fast to where
   Maude fell?  They were all inside [the racetrack stands].  {jv}

+  Moe refers to Ned's "insane fear of drinking" yet, Ned has Duff on tap in
   the rumpus room.  {dmc}

=  Many of Ned's punches don't hit Moe.  {jp}

=  There isn't supposed to be a window in the location that they show Maude's
   photo at the reception.  {reg}

+  Ned said that he should've been a gentleman by getting the hotdogs instead
   of Maude, but the REASON she was getting them was to get away from Homer
   (yet another way her death was indirectly Homer's fault).  {reg}

=  Homer is shown wearing pajama tops, but when they are on the swings, Homer
   has nothing on under his bathrobe.  {reg}

+  There wasn't anybody taping Maggie's birth in "And Maggie Makes Three
   (2F10)."

*  Why would Flanders have a hedge against the Simpson fence?  {th}

=  Since when did Ned have a blue car?  {reg}

*  Mace might not have too much of an impact when sprayed through glasses.  [I
   suspect enough of the mist would go around the lens and contact the eye for
   it to work -- Ed.]  {th}

*  The personal ID number does not show on screen at an ATM.  (I know it was a
   joke, no flames please.)  {th}

c  When Homer says, "Listen to this testimonial," the closed-captioning reads,
   "Listen to these testimonials."  {bjr}

*  The camera probably wouldn't have wipes, but if it did, what are the
   chances that both it and the editor have star wipes?  {jp}

+  The tape Homer shows Ned doesn't even have any star wipes.  {jp}

+  In previous eps, Ned's bedroom has faced Homer and Marge's but here it does
   not.  {th}

c  Diane calls her dog "Foofie," but the closed-captioning reads, "Foofoo."
   {bjr}

*  Ned having a picture of God seemed rather odd.  Is there a Biblical rule
   against HAVING images of God, or just in WORSHIPPING them?  [See comments
   section for more -- Ed.]  {nd}

+  If Ned doesn't approve of electric guitars being played in church, then why
   didn't he object to Lovejoy playing one in "Faith Off"?  {jg}

*  Bart smiled, as if he liked the song?  [In] "Colonel Homer " Bart declared
   that "Country music sucks!!!"  [Ben Mann counters, "How do you know he
   wasn't smirking at the band (and the bass player from Satanica), admiring
   Shawn Colvin's character, or thinking of something else entirely?"]  {pdc}

==============================================================================
> Reviews
==============================================================================
Nate Birch:  After comparing this episode to last week's crap heap, I think
   maybe they should kill off characters more often.  This episode wasn't too
   wacky, Homer actually lived up to his promise and wasn't a jerk (in fact he
   was a little too nice), everyone was in character and the plot wasn't bad,
   the odd thing is though, this was written by Ian Maxtone-Graham!  The only
   question left is, was it funny?  Well not too funny, there were some good
   jokes, but the humor was a bit more subdued, oh well it was still a pretty
   good episode.  (B+)

Paul D. Canniff:  What could have been another "'Round Springfield" was dumbed
   down into a sitcom-style "Neddie Needs A Girlie" plotline.  Emotional
   episodes have been written in the past, but apparently Ian Maxtone-Graham
   believes emotion should just be a tool for a series of stupid jokes.  [...]
   I must admit though, there were some genuinely funny moments which should
   be highlighted: The collage of dead Simpsons characters gravestones during
   the funeral and Reverend Lovejoy's eulogy were laugh-out-loud funny.  And
   the fact, that the raceway girls were firing off the very object that
   killed Maude into the air gave me a chuckle. However, aside from these cute
   gags, this episode was just a meaningless continuity shuffle with little to
   offer.  (C-)

Joel Cunni:  Well, that was a nice episode.  I really liked the scenes after
   the funeral, with Apu and then Moe comforting Ned.  The scene with Ned and
   Homer on the swings was nice as well (love that rock-fight).  A few people
   have complained about the ending, saying it seemed too abrupt, but I liked
   it.  Sort of bittersweet.  And I really liked the song.  Of course, not
   everything was perfect.  I can't remember anything that really stands out
   except for that big "IAN MAXTONE-GRAHM" thing.  It was too self-referential
   for the tone of the episode, and just wasn't funny.  Overall:  Not terribly
   funny, but it WAS a funeral episode.  Nice emotional interactions.  (A)

Nathan DeHoff:  I was actually pleasantly surprised at this one.  It managed
   to have a heart, and not to be as crude as the "Kidney Trouble" camp, yet
   there were still some great jokes.  "Bible Blaster," for instance, was
   hilarious.  I could actually buy the characters' reactions, too.  I think
   this was probably the best episode dealing with death, with more laughs
   than "Old Money" and more sensitivity than "'Round Springfield."  The
   ending seemed a bit abrupt, but that's a minor complaint for an episode
   that could easily have been a LOT worse.  (A)

Curtis Gibby:  It was better than I expected.  It was even better than I
   hoped.  This wasn't an extremely funny show, but that wasn't the point.  It
   was a feel-good episode, which I appreciate.  I thought that the writers
   wove emotion and humor together nicely.  For example, I enjoyed how they
   built a stronger relationship between Homer and Ned, but I also chuckled
   when Homer put a few war rocks in his pockets, just in case. The end was
   wide open and I liked that.  IMO, it wasn't as good as "'Round
   Springfield," but it was a thoroughly enjoyable episode.  (A)

Joe Green:  As might be expected, I have somewhat mixed feelings about this
   episode.  Even though Maude was never a truly significant character, I
   don't know if the show will feel right without her.  That, and word had it
   that the producers killed off Maude to get even with Maggie Roswell for
   quitting, but I digress.  On the other hand, it did have some very funny
   moments (especially in the first act) and more notably, there was actually
   an effort to portray Homer as sensitive, which is particularly refreshing
   coming from Maxtone-Graham.  (C+)

Richard E. Green:  I have mixed views on this episode.  While it had some
   FUNNY parts (Ian, Cletus, "I think it's pretty obvious I DON'T [still have
   a job] -- another poke at a.t.s., the date video) there were just too many
   inconceivable things in this episode -- the bear using the bag and the
   trash can, squirrels with wrenches, Maude getting knocked over by a
   T-shirt, the way a lot of the characters acted in this episode -- really
   didn't help it more ... this isn't the Simpsons I remember!  Well, they
   could've handled the plot better (the episode was SCREAMING "we're out of
   ideas!!!"), and the episode really DIDN'T have an ending [...], but at
   least the entire episode wasn't all Homer gets a new job or does/goes
   something/where stupid.  (C+)

Tony Hill:  This was definitely a different episode.  It was much more maudlin
   than its obvious comparison, "'Round Springfield."  I don't remember being
   so uncomfortable watching an OFF episode since "Marge Be Not Proud." The
   first act was pretty funny, but it was hard to laugh knowing what was
   coming.  (B-)

Carl Johnson:  A truly inspired episode that wasted too much of its time and
   lost its sense of direction.  The jokes were way above average, and Ned's
   characterization was touching and sympathetic, but the story was a mess,
   and Homer's behavior was a mite equivocal, to say the least.  Too rough
   around the heart for its own good, BABF10 generally stays on track and
   provides a decent, involving, occasionally amusing episode.  (B+)

Joe Klemm:  After having many famous people die in the last few days (Jim
   Varney, Charles Schultz), this episode, with deals with death, is a good
   way of cheering people up.  The writers took a serious subject (losing a
   loved one) and was able to deal with it while still being funny.  Plus, the
   episode made you feel more sympathetic towards Ned than usual, which is
   rare for me since I see him as somewhat of the Anti-Christ.  The only
   complaint was that Fox had to shorten the song in the credits just so they
   can show an ad for next week's episode, which looks like it's going to be a
   stinker.  (A-)

Andrew Levine:  This was a surprise ... I think this episode is comparable to
   Season 2: mostly realistic, emphasizing character, and disappointingly
   short on laugh-out-loud humor.  Flanders is portrayed more like a real
   person than in any previous episode centering around him, while Homer is a
   well-meaning schemer who (gasp!) actually helps Ned out (and he didn't even
   sow salt in Flanders' lawn).  The first two minutes were weak (except for
   the clever writing-credit gag) and the last two minutes were rushed, making
   it seem as if Rachel Jordan will return (most likely she'll be voiced by
   Tress Macneille).  Rachel seems much more interesting as a character than
   the relatively bland Maude, and I hope we shall see her again.  It was also
   wonderful that they didn't have a cheesy scene where Maude reappears to Ned
   as a ghost.  I didn't think they could pull this episode off with dignity
   and maturity, but ...  (B+)

Adam Long:  I thought "Alone Again ..." was very well-written and put
   together.  Lots of great jokes, but not tasteless, and Ned's character
   transitions back to his good old self were handled nicely.  It was good
   that the death wasn't the main focus, since it would be really easy to
   screw up the episode that way.  It was also nice to see that caring side of
   Homer again after so long, trying to help his friend recover from his loss.
   Despite a lackluster first few minutes, I think this episode could easily
   hold its own in Seasons 6-8.  (A)

Patrick McGovern:  Well, it wasn't the best of season (Hello Gutter, Hello
   Fadder still has that honor), it wasn't the funniest (Grift of the Magi)
   ... but it was still one of the best.  The humor seemed to skewer a lot
   racier than you'd expect, and some jokes were duds (The "written by" joke
   was too obvious- maybe they should've stuck it on a sign in the background
   or something), but yet this seemed to make up for those flaws in emotion,
   characterization, and effort.  For what it's worth, this is the third time
   this season I've given this grade (Faith Off and Grift of the Magi are the
   other two) ...  (A-)

Robert Muldoon:  Well, this was a surprisingly good episode.  I still don't
   think that they should have killed off Maude, but they dealt with it in a
   respectful manner (except for the T-shirt salute).  The tombstones of the
   other departed characters were hilarious (especially Frank Grimes'). I
   don't think this is a turnaround for "The Simpsons", nor will I be watching
   it again.  I hope that this _is_ a turnaround, but as previously stated, I
   doubt it.  (B-)

Michael Nusair:  A pretty good episode.  The death itself was a little cheesy
   (getting knocked over by tee-shirts?  Okay..), but I thought that it was
   handled well.  There were some genuinely touching moments, such as Homer
   kissing Ned on the forehead, and the very end.  This surprised me a bit, as
   I wasn't really sure how they were going to handle the death.  They seemed
   to do a pretty good job of it.  And it did have a few very funny parts,
   most notably Ned driving to Church apologizing to God.  On the whole, not
   as many laughs as the average episode, but that is certainly to be
   expected, considering the subject matter.  Overall, a pretty good episode,
   despite the stupid way Maude was killed off.  (B)

Chris Palm:  Wow ... THEY DID IT!  They produced a tasteful episode, with a
   full three acts of quality!  No lapse in it at the end of the final act or
   anything. Homer's attempt at comforting Ned was great, and the dating video
   has hilarious.  Maude's death may have seemed a tad bit cartoonish, but
   it's better than Homer causing the crash that COULD have killed her.
   Everyone was perfectly in character.  I mean ... wow.  Easily Ian
   Maxtone-Grahams best episode ever.  (A+)

Mark A. Richey:  Maude is now gone.  And the episode was handled much more
   tastefully than I feared.  Thankfully, Homer's involvement in her death,
   while pivotal, was a complete accident.  In fact, Homer's behavior
   throughout the episode was, for the most part, entirely respectable.  His
   support of Ned was admirable, if half-assed.  But an incompetent Homer is
   far better than jerkass Homer.  The episode laid the meta-refs on a little
   thick.  OK, so showing the gravestones was OK, but did we really need to be
   reminded that Maude was only a supporting character?  Shawn Colvin was fine
   in her brief role, and the song she sang was surprisingly spiritual.  This
   was not a classic episode, but it was much better than I feared.  (B)

Eric Sansoni:  With this "very special episode" the show makes a classy return
   to the gentler character exploration and wittier writing of Season 8.  The
   characters seem like human beings with genuine feelings, who inhabit a plot
   with relevance to real life.  With actual dramatic tension to break, the
   jokes seem sharper and the laughs are louder.  Homer may be a bit too
   obnoxious at times, and the death itself is crudely executed, but Ned's
   plight is handled with sensitivity.  A wonderful guest voice and a
   beautiful song end the episode on just the right note, with hope and care
   in our hearts for Ned.  I only wish I could look forward to more of this
   story instead of The Wacky Adventures of Homer Jay Simpson next week.  (A-)

David Sibley:  A pretty good episode.  Definitely better than most from this
   season and the last.  I hate to see Maude, or anyone from the show, die
   like this, but they couldn't give her the Dr. Marvin Monroe treatment.  I
   thought that the episode handled the subject rather well.  It was serious
   but still contained plenty of humor.  It had wackiness that I like without
   going into the completely unrealistic kind that has been prevalent the last
   couple of seasons.  The "Written by Ian Maxtone-Graham" part and the entire
   funeral scene were great.  (A)

Jim Terzis:  After a less than stellar first act (I think the ending was
   rather rushed), the show really picked up.  The second and third acts
   didn't have a lot of unneeded humor, and the wackiness was toned down quite
   a bit which made this episode stand out from the rest of the season.  All
   the characters were used really good: "Hey Homer what the hell are you
   doing" was crazy funny.  The whole video tape dating thing was pretty good,
   but didn't have me laughing a lot.  I also think they made too many past
   episode references (I mean, that funeral scene pointed out just about every
   single lasting continuity in recent years, but at least they were pretty
   funny).  All in all it was a good episode to show the passing of Maude.
   (A-)

Yours Truly:  This episode does surprisingly well at reconciling the need to
   be funny with the need to treat Maude's death in a dignified manner.  The
   freak accident that claims Maude is offbeat enough to fit in the "Simpsons"
   universe, but not excessively weird or comic.  Meanwhile, Homer's dating
   video for Flanders is highlight of the show.  Shawn Colvin has a nice guest
   role as the singer in a Christian-rock band that helps Ned work through his
   feelings.  On the other hand, Ned's stoic acceptance of Maude's passing
   robs the show of some of the poignancy it otherwise would have had.
   Tonight's episode shows that sensitive yet funny storytelling in "The
   Simpsons" is still alive and kicking.  Let's hope that these traits have
   not died along with Maude.  (A-)

AVERAGE GRADE:  B (3.09)   Std Dev.: 1.0624   (32 reviews computed)

==============================================================================
> Comments and other observations
==============================================================================
>> Musical References

Tony Hill:  "Alone Again (Naturally)" was a hit for British pop singer Gilbert
   O'Sullivan, whose real first name is Raymond, in 1972.  Some dismiss
   O'Sullivan as a one-hit artist, but he had two others, "Clair" and "Who Was
   It."  He had nothing to do with "Oh Babe What Would You Say."


Joe Klemm:  The music in Homer's video about Ned [is] "I'm Too Sexy."


>> Meta-Reference

Joe Klemm:  The writer's credit is done differently to give it a meta-humor
   feel following Lisa's comment about writing your name just to show off?


Nathan DeHoff:  Lisa's asking Homer if he still had a job might be an ATS
   reference, since a common complaint on the group has been that Homer is
   often doing something else when he probably should be working at the power
   plant.  It could just be a reference to this occurrence without the ATS
   connection, though.


Benjamin Robinson:  Quite a bit of Rev. Lovejoy's eulogy contained meta-
   references, including

   *  Maude was referred to as a "supporting player."  The definition fits her
   status on the show.

   *  As the Reverend points out, she didn't have a funny accent or catch
   phrase.

   *  He also said everyone assumed she'd always be here.  I get the
   impression the staff was as surprised to see her go as the "real world"
   was.


Patrick McGovern:  Homer's "No more being a jerk" line [is a] reference to the
   endless comments about "Jerkass Homer."


>> Headline News

Art and reality sometimes intersect uncomfortably, as this article Jouni
   Paakkinen found notes:  [From]
   http://www.gocarolinas.com/news/charlotte/2000/02/07_simpsons_ad.html

   Some say 'The Simpsons' speedway episode goes too far

   CONCORD, N.C. -- It has been nine months since three spectators were killed
   in an accident at the Lowe's Motor Speedway.

   Now some people in our area are upset that a popular show could be turning
   the tragedy into comedy.

   Some television viewers say they saw a promotional ad for an upcoming
   episode of "The Simpsons" that appears to be making fun of the accident.

   When some people saw a controversial ad on the Fox network Sunday night it
   brought all the horrible memories back.  They say the network is making fun
   of the deaths and they want the show pulled.

   Who can forget what happened last May when Indy cars crashed at Lowe's
   motor speedway sending flying debris into the stands killing three people
   and injuring 8 others?

   Lisa Herring hasn't forgotten. She was stunned to see the promotion Sunday
   night for the fox show, "The Simpsons."

   "One of Springfield's most beloved will die. I'm ok, folks. It's the most
   shocking Simpsons ever," says the national television commercial.

   "I don't think anything like that should be put on television as far as a
   comedy type of thing," said Lisa Herring.

   Herring and her children cringe when they think about how the families of
   those killed and injured in the speedway crash feel about deaths made
   comic.  Speedway officials also say Fox may be going too far.

   "That's a real insensitive thing to do, pretty irresponsible.  Obviously
   what might appear funny in L.A. or New York isn't funny here in Charlotte,"
   said Jerry Gappens at Lowe's Motor Speedway.

   The local Fox affiliate, WCCB, says it's talking to the network and will
   not show the ad for the time being.

   Lisa Herring hopes they take things a step further.

   "I just don't think that particular show should be shown.  Show something
   else. Show a rerun," said Herring.

   So far, the speedway has not contacted the Fox network, but says it may
   lodge a complaint.

   The Fox station in Charlotte says it was taken by surprise by the Simpsons
   ad. The station insists it will not treat this cavalierly.

   [Thanks, Jouni! -- Ed.]


Commenting on the above article, James Allen wrote:  "Funny in NY or LA, but
   not funny in Charlotte."  That's rich.

   Well, Mr. Gerry Gappens of Lowe's Motor Speedway, I guess wanting to go see
   cars drive around in a circle hoping to see a cool crash is fun in
   Charlotte.

   But no, it's the Simpsons fault that he presides over such a dangerous
   sport that puts profit ahead of fan safety.

   And a quick joke in a cartoon is so offensive?  Please ...

   I've never understood some people.  I mean, I've seen some things on TV
   that possibly could bother me because they relate to a personal tragedy,
   but I wouldn't call for the show to be yanked off the air, I just wouldn't
   watch it. That's what the channel changer is for.


Lisa Miller:  This is great!  I live 5 miles from the speedway in question,
   and I couldn't be happier they're making fun of it.  Any episode that
   pisses people off should be a good one.

   And as for that "not funny in Charlotte" comment -- I live here and I think
   the show is hysterical.  We're not all rubes.


Dean Humphries quotes the master himself:  "Part of the fun of being alive is
   knowing that you're annoying the hell out of someone else." -- Matt
   Groening


>> Headline News, Part II

Dean Humphries submits this article, from the "Los Angeles Times":  Simpsons'
   Actor Disputes Fox on Reason for Leaving.

   Her character, Maude Flanders, may be killed in upcoming show.  She says
   request for was refused.

   By PAUL BROWNFIELD

   TIMES STAFF WRITER.

   At Fox's long-running animated hit "The Simpsons".  gets set to kill off a
   character February sweeps, the actress who voiced the role of Maude
   Flanders is saying her character's rumored demise is a case of death-by-
   corporate-greed. Maggie Roswell, who played Maude, wife of Simpsons
   neighbor Christian do-gooder Ned Flanders says she left the show last
   spring because 20th Century Fox Television, the studio that produces "The
   Simpsons," refused to give her a raise.  In previous reports of Roswell's
   departure, Fox has said the actress left the show because she no longer
   wanted to commute to Los Angeles from her Denver home.

   "There's a presence that I helped create in Springfield," said Roswell,
   referring to the show's hometown.  An actress and writer from Los Angeles,
   Roswell has lived the last four years in Denver, where she and her husband
   run a recording studio for voice-over work.  Before leaving the show last
   had been with "The Simpsons" since its inception as a prime-time series in
   1989. In addition to Maude Flanders, Roswell voiced other Springfield
   residents, including Helen Lovejoy, wife of Rev. Lovejoy, and Miss Hoover,
   one of Lisa Simpsons schoolteachers.  This season Maude's appearances on
   the show have been minimal, with another voice actress filling in.

   "Simpsons" producers haven't revealed who win be rubbed out in the show's
   Feb.13 episode, but the show's title provides a potential clue that Maude
   will be offed.  The episode is called "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly," a
   reference to Ned Flanders' particular way of speaking.

   Mike Scully, executive producer of the show, was in transit and could not
   be reached for comment.

   Roswell's contract grievance isn't new to "The Simpsons--or to Fox, which
   has seen squabbles with actors go public on other shows, including "The X-
   Files." Two years ago, the five major voice actors on "The Simpsons"-Dan
   Castellaneta (Homer), Nancy Cartwright (Bart), Yeardley Smith (Lisa), Harry
   Shearer (Mr. Burns, Smithers) and Hank Azaria (Moe the bartender, Chief
   Wiggum, Apu)-held out for big raises, eventually winning multimillion-
   dollar packages to stay on the show.

   Roswell, by contrast, says she was asking for $6,000 an episode and
   increase from the $1,500 to $2,000 an episode she earned the last three
   seasons for her recurring guest she said.  When Fox offered a raise of
   $150, she decided to quit, because the raise didn't even cover the cost of
   having to fly to Los Angeles to record her portions of the scripts, she
   said.  Pamela Hayden, who voices the role of Bart's friend Milhouse,
   threatened a similar walkout earlier this season before getting a raise.

   Roswell's tactics, however, fell short, perhaps proving what "Simpsons"
   fans may discover Feb. 13-that Maude is an expendable character. "I was
   part of the backbone of 'The Simpsons,' and I didn't think [the requested
   raise] was exorbitant," Roswell said.  "I wasn't asking for what the other
   cast members make.  I was just trying to recoup all the costs I had in
   travel.  If they'd flown me in, I'd still be working".


Ricardo A Lafaurie, Jr.:  Considering the pay she was getting before (which, I
   agree, was meager), PLUS the ridiculous pay the main voice actors are
   getting, I say Maggie Roswell was right to leave.


>> Headline News, Part III

Well, this is not exactly news, but "Alone Again" was deemed important enough
   by the editors of "TV Guide" to warrant a "close-up" -- essentially, an
   expanded listing that's like a miniature magazine article.  Mark Aaron
   Richey was nice enough to transcribe it for us.

   Springfieldians mourn the untimely death of one of their own, a tragedy
   that occurred at the new auto-racing venue.  And Homer, a pivotal figure in
   the tragic incident, assists in consoling the grief-stricken. Why kill off
   someone?  "It was a chance for one of our regular characters to face a
   challenge and grow in a new direction," says executive producer Mike
   Scully.  "Also," he said laughing, "it's sweeps.  That's my official
   quote."  The idea "came up quickly, we all latched on to it, and it just
   felt right.  We didn't want to kill a character for the sake of killing.
   We wanted it to have consequences for surviving characters to deal with in
   future episodes".

   The full page ad has several cast members' heads in a circle, leaning over
   someone, with the text "The Most Shocking Episode Ever!  Somebody dies in
   Springfield!  Tonight, find out who?"  ("The Simpsons, All New!  7PM Fox 4
   KDFW Dallas-Fort Worth").  The people in the ad, clockwise from the lower
   left are Bart, Ned, Maude (!), Dr. Hibbert, Apu, Marge, Otto, and Homer,
   saying "The suspense is killing me ... kidding!"


>> The Full Circle Theory

As proposed by Bill McNeal:  Maude Flanders is going to die, but that's the
   way it was meant to be. Consider: when the series began, (let's just say
   for the sake of the argument, "Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire,") we see
   Ned and one of the kids (not sure which one).  No mention of Maude is made
   at all.  A theory can be made that there is some point in the series at
   which a an "ending" and a "beginning" can be defined, thus connecting the
   series finale to the series premiere.  The producers could then kill off
   Maude because she wasn't seen in the beginning of the series.  Maude didn't
   appear in the first season, not until 7F08 if I'm not mistaken..


>> Anatomy of a rumor

Joe Klemm:  Here's a small guide to how the "Maude will die" storyline morphed
   from rumor to actual episode.  Feel free to reword it and add more
   information in anyway

   1.  One of the writers of the school, while talking to a group of school
   kids, hinted that a character would die in Season 11, with the victim being
   Maude.

   2.  Maggie Roswell, the voice of Maude, has left the cast of the Simpsons.
   The reason for her departure is due to either the decision of stop going on
   a long commute from Denver to LA to do her voice or a failed attempt to get
   a raise. Maude's voice was replaced for Season 11, thus leading to the
   possibility that she would die in a later episode.

   3.  It is revealed that one of the Season 11 episode titles was named Faith
   Off. Many people thought this would be the episode that Maude would die in.
   They were wrong, as the episode was instead about Bart believing he has
   healing powers while Homer prepares for Springfield University's
   homecoming.

   4.  Around January, Fox announced that one of the February episodes is
   titled Alone Again Natural-iddly, which had a summary that a character will
   die in it. Considering the episode's name, which refers to Ned's way of
   talking, and the circulation of the "Maude Will Die" rumor, viewers
   realized that Maude would die in this episode.  However, in a failed
   attempt to throw some viewers off from the truth, Fox announced that the
   victim could also be Moe, which would be impossible since a later episode
   had him as a main character, or Skinner.

   5.  The episode airs, thus finally proving that Maude will die in Season
   11.

   [Impressive.  Now, can you tell us who shot Kennedy? -- Ed.]


>> Maggie Roswell, we hardly knew thee

Haynes Lee observes:  These two scenes were very prophetic

   ----------------------------

   Bart watches through the telescope as Rod and Todd walk up to their Daddy.
   Todd: Daddy, where's Mommy?  We miss her.
   Ned: Mommy ... had to go away.  She's with God now.
   Rod+Todd: Yay!  Can we go there too?
   Ned: [remorsefully] Soon enough.
   Rod+Todd: Yay!
   Bart: [gasps] He's going to kill Rod and Todd too.
   That's horrible! ... in principle.

   -- Bart vs. the seventh commandment, "Bart of Darkness"

   ------------------------------

   MISS HOOVER:  You have one line, and then you're shot.

   -- Miss Hoover coaches Milhouse on his role as Abraham Lincoln,
   ``I Love Lisa''

   [N.B.:  In addition to Maude Flanders, Maggie Roswell played Miss Hoover --
   Ed.]


Bill McNeal adds:

   MAUDE: I hope they have "Us" magazine in Heaven.


>> The bees are coming!  The bees are coming!

So warns Benjamin Robinson:  In the mid-Fifties, scientists in Brazil were
   trying to increase honey yields by crossing European honeybees with African
   ones.  The European bees were docile (by bee standards) but not big honey
   producers. Their African cousins, in comparison, produced a lot of honey,
   but were aggressive.  The breeders got the worst of both worlds -- "killer
   bees" that were aggressive and produced less honey than usual.  Even worse,
   a hive of them accidentally escaped, and began breeding in the wild.  Still
   worse, reports came back that people who went into the woods risked being
   swarmed and even killed by thousands of these insects.  That's not all --
   they began extending their range northward, toward the United States.
   Today, Africanized bees are a major headache for the honey industry, as the
   they crowd out the native European variety.


>> The cheap seats

Benjamin Robinson:  At the race, Homer observes all the poor folk sitting in
   the infield. In the few races I've seen on TV, the infields appear to be
   populated by middle-class if not outright rich people.  They'll get permits
   to set up their motor homes in advance, and spend a few days barbecuing,
   talking with fellow race fans, and watching the action unfold around them.

   Also, I'm told seating prices at NASCAR races are backwards from other
   sports.  The back row places you high up, so you can see what's happening
   on all parts of the track.  Thus, these are the expensive seats.  Sitting
   down front is cheaper and lets you feel the roar of the engines as the cars
   race by, but it's harder to follow what's going on at the far side of the
   track.


>> And you thought this couldn't happen in real life

Steve Timko:  Just wanted to point out that Maude Flanders was killed by T-
   shirts fired out of air cannons.  That's what they do before "The Tonight
   Show" (at least the three times I was there).  And "The Tonight Show" was
   sued last year by a guest who got blasted with a gift from an air cannon.


There's also another late-night talk show connection, as Timko goes on to
   explain:  Tim Long, a former "Late Show [with David Letterman]" head
   writer, was co-producer on the death episode.  I don't know if there's any
   other Lettermen tie ins.


>> No Foot-longs!

Shannon Robert Burge:  There are a few reasons why this doesn't necessarily
   mean Ned is the John Holmes of The Simpsons.

   1) Homer edited the tape (not letting Lisa see the nudity), and he wasn't
   very precise in blocking out Ned's thing, creating a huge blur.

   2) Homer was trying to make Ned appeal to the lonely women who rely on
   video dating, and thus lied about Ned's endowment.


>> So *that's* what he does when he's not designing video games

>> Eligible Bachelors

Benjamin Robinson surveys Maude's choices:  In Heaven, the lineup includes

   John Wayne -- movie star who typically played a tough hero. Even more
   typically, it would be a western, although he starred in several war films.
   Wayne can be seen in classics like "Stagecoach," "Shane," and "The
   Searchers," often directed by his friend John Ford.  Wayne is equally
   famous for being a tough, macho guy off the set.  He was married while
   alive, and pushing eighty when he died, so he might not be on Maude's
   dating list.

   Tupac Shakur -- "gangsta" rap musician who died in a shooting incident.
   Reputedly, this was a "hit" spurred by a feud between two competing groups
   of rappers, one on the East coast, and one on the West.  Shakur's
   confidantes have been reluctant to cooperate with the police, so we may
   never know the full truth.

   Sherlock Holmes -- Sir Arthur Conan Doyle's fictional detective, he with
   the tweed cap, pipe, and "Elementary, my dear Watson" tagline.  Holmes was
   an upper-crust eccentric who liked to solve crimes more than chasing women.
   (And of course, he's fictional, so Ned doesn't have much competition
   there.)


>> Picturing God

Nathan DeHoff wondered:  Is there a Biblical rule against HAVING images of
   God, or just in WORSHIPPING them?


A number of people responded, including Daniel McConnell:  I dunno, the
   commandment mentioned worshipping false idols and graven images (implying
   that  these were pagan in nature, not images of God, that being the case, a
   crucifix could be construed as an image of God) but it appeared to be a
   photograph.  Now just how might one acquire one of those?


Langdon Alger answers:  It seems to me that you have to be a fan club member.


Eric Sansoni:  It would have been more realistic if it was one of those
   Renaissance-style paintings of Jesus Christ.  I have never heard of any
   religious person who kept a picture of an old guy with a beard to represent
   their God.  But it is consistent with the way the "big guy upstairs" has
   been portrayed on the show before, so maybe they thought it would work in
   the spirit of cartoon imagery.


Ben Adams:  When I saw that picture of God, I was reminded of the episode in
   which God came down and watched football with Homer.  The interesting thing
   was, they didn't show God's face in that episode, and yet they showed it in
   Ned's picture.


"Ratboy" Dave:  I think that in the episode you mentioned, they showed god's
   beard.  And Ned's picture seemed consistent with what we already knew of
   the appearance of God as far as the show is concerned.


Shannon Robert Burge suggests:  Maybe it's a photo of Charlton Heston as Moses
   ...?  ["Ratboy" Dave:  "I didn't see any handguns" -- Ed.]


>> Tonight's Guest

Daniel L. Dreibelbis:  SHAWN COLVIN -- acclaimed Grammy winning
   singer/songwriter, came to prominence about two years ago with her album A
   FEW SMALL REPAIRS and its single "Sunny Came Home" (about a woman who sets
   fire to her house after a hard day).  She did a great job with the tune in
   tonight's episode -- those were some pretty cool lyrics for a Christian
   tune.


>> Religion rocks!

Daniel L. Dreibelbis:  as Yosh and Stan Schmenge would say, how do you get the
   little children to take the aspirin?  You mix it in with the ice cream, of
   course.  That seems to be the case with Christian Rock, a genre that's been
   around for awhile but which really began taking off around the mid-
   eighties, mixing a serious Christian message along with a more modern sound
   that better appeals to today's youth.  As you could imagine, there are
   different types of styles, from the pop sounds of Amy Grant, Sixpence None
   The Richer, and Jars of Clay, the harder edged styles of Phil Keaggy and
   Newsboys, the skatepunk stylings of One Bad Pig, and the heavy metal sound
   of Stryper and King's X. (I've even heard about a new subgenre of Christian
   grindcore/industrial!)  It's also not uncommon for people in more secular
   bands to spend some time doing side Christian projects.  And as Flanders
   showed his concern with Kovenant at first, there's a definite split in the
   Christian community on the subject, with the fundamentalists denouncing the
   music and the musicians as being tools of Satan, while the charismatics see
   it as a novel way to "make a joyful noise unto the Lord".  (One of my
   favorite scenes was on an episode of the "700 Club", in which Rick Wakeman
   -- yes, the same Rick Wakeman from Yes, who was "born again" about a decade
   ago -- in talking about a spiritual recording project he was doing, said
   that not all rock was evil and that there were many good secular bands he
   enjoyed listening to.  I thought Pat Robertson (who has denounced Christian
   Rock as evil, and has often shown record burnings on his show) was going to
   have a heart attack!)


>> Fun with band names

Mortado Goatshead:  OK, I(a hardcore metal fan), have noticed something in
   Maude's death episode.  That Xtian rock band Kovenant who performed at the
   church is actually the name of a Norwegian black metal group.  In fact, the
   REAL Kovenant is very unholy and consists of members from fellow Norwegian
   black metallers Dimmu Borgir and Troll.  So in other words, they are
   stealing their name.


"DJ Maniak":  I'd also like to point out that there are 3 bands that I know of
   called Kovenant (different spellings in some cases, for obvious reasons),
   and not a single one of them is a Christian C+W band.  One is a
   Black/Gothic Metal band, One is an Electro/Industrial band, and one is a
   Black/Gothic Industrial/Metal band.


>> Kan you kome to a konklusion to this kuestion?

Curtis Gibby wondered:  I understand that the "t" was supposed to represent a
   cross, but what was the deal with the oversized "k"?  Is that some other
   religious symbol I didn't get?  (I expected someone to post about it, but
   instead I came here and found an insane amount of bickering.)


Jason Eiseman:  Often substituting a K for a C in a word is often to denote
   something which is evil, or oppressive, or in that general vein.  The first
   I ever heard of this was the novel Amerika by Kafka.  But it is also used
   in the song Karn Evil 9, just to be cool, and again in the movie
   Kalifornia.  Again I think the last two use the K just to be cool, normally
   it is used as a sort of political statement, as it was with Amerika.  I
   think the reference Kovenant might have something to do with this.


>> Miscellaneous, Etc.

The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this episode is:  Flanders of Maude


Andrew Levine suggests:  Tears in He-diddly-eaven


Curtis Gibby:  Did Shawn Colvin's song remind anyone else of Weird Al's "Truck
   Drivin' Song"?  (Not the content, of course, but the music and rhythm.)


Richard E. Green:  It appears that the VCR that Ned has is the JVC HR-S9600U
   S-VHS ... which is relevant because that's the SAME VCR I used to tape and
   review this episode!


Jouni Paakkinen:  If you go to the official Simpsons site at
   www.thesimpsons.com, you'll see a Maude angel floating over the main screen
   once, naturally upwards.  [Obviously, no longer true -- Ed.]


Richard E. Green:  Interesting that they decided to title the JavaScript for
   the page "Dead Maude."


==============================================================================
> Quotes and Scene Summary  {bjr}
==============================================================================
% The family enjoys a day of hiking in the woods.  Lisa reminds 
% everyone to leave nature clean by taking out everything they bring 
% in.  And she does mean everything.

Lisa:	Now remember, we have to leave nature just the way we 
	found it.  Everything we pack in, we pack out.
Homer:	What if I have to do my business?
Lisa:	Use this plastic bag.  [hands one to Homer]
Homer:	Aw, how come bears can crap in the woods and I can't?
	[after the family walks out of frame, a bear walks up to a 
	garbage can, and deposits a plastic bag]
-- Earth-friendly bears, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Lisa's revels in the beauty of nature are cut short by the sound of 
% angry buzzing.  Marge suspects Africanized "killer" bees are 
% swarming about.  Homer breaks out the bee repellent, giving his 
% family jewels an extra-long spray, just for good measure.
%
% Bart discovers that the noise is actually coming from cars racing 
% along Springfield's new racetrack.

Lisa:	The bird sanctuary -- they've ruined it!
Homer:	No, they didn't.  They just surrounded it with something 
	wonderful, like a raisin covered in chocolate, or a monkey 
	in a cowboy suit.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% The family crosses over the track -- in spite of the fact that cars 
% are running on it at the time -- and go to the infield.  Homer 
% remarks on how well the wildlife has adapted to their new neighbors.  
% Beavers build a dam with discarded tires, two squirrels duel with 
% socket wrenches, a parrot tells Marge, "show us your boobs," and a 
% chameleon changes colors to match an STP can.
%
% Lisa walks past a tree with initials carved into it and wonders 
% aloud, "Why do jerks think everyone wants to see their stupid name?"  
% By astonishing coincidence, the phrase "WRITTEN BY IAN MAXTONE-
% GRAHAM" appears on the screen in big, bold letters.
%
% The Simpsons settle down to a little picnic in the infield.  
% Suddenly, a car veers off the track, crashes hear them, and catches 
% fire.  The driver climbs out from under his upside-down car.

Babcock:	Sorry to break up your picnic, folks.  I'm two-time 
		Fast Car champ Clay Babcock.
Marge:		[pointing to some flames on Babcock's racing suit]
		You're on fire!
Babcock:	Yeah, I have won a lot of races, but it's all thanks 
		to my crew, really.
		[puts out the flames on his suit]
Bart:		Mr. Babcock, can I take a ride in your car?
Babcock:	Well, my "A" car was just incinerated, but you can 
		ride in my "B" car.  [a ball of flame leaps from the 
		"A" car]
Marge:		I don't see why not.
-- Coming soon:  Marge Visits the Eye Doctor, "Alone Again, Natura-
   Diddly"

% In the "B" car, Babcock explains to Bart that these are the time 
% trials which determine the pole position.  [That is, the order in 
% which the drivers will start the race.  The fastest car in the 
% trials starts at the head of the field.]  Bart, lounging in the back 
% seat, is impressed with how roomy the car is.  Babcock says that 
% drivers like to take their families along, and his wife tells the 
% boy to get his feet off the upholstery.
%
% Babcock drives up to the rest of the family after his run.

Babcock:	Folks, I've got some spare tickets if you'd like to 
		stick around for the race.  [holds up some tickets]
Lisa:		That's very sweet but we have a full day of hiking 
		planned.
Homer:		We can hike anytime.  This is our chance to see cars 
		driving.  [takes the tickets]
-- Yeah, get your priorities straight, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% When the race begins, the stands are packed with people taking the 
% opportunity to see cars driving.  The Simpsons are in the next-to-
% last row.  A familiar face makes an unexpected appearance.

Ned:		Hi-diddly-ho, petal-to-the-metal-ophiles.
Homer:		Flanders?  Since when do you like anything cool?
Ned:		Oh, I don't care for the speed, but I can't get 
		enough of that safety gear -- helmets, roll bars, 
		caution flags ...
Maude:		I like the fresh air, and looking at the poor people 
		in the infield.  [points]
		[cut to the infield.  Cletus and Brandine kiss in 
		the back of a pickup truck]
Brandine:	Dang, Cletus, why'd you have to park by my parents?
Cletus:		Now, honey, they's my parents, too.
		[another hick plays a banjo flourish]
-- Yee-ha, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% The roar of engines heralds the start of the race.  The Flanders are 
% seated in the last row, just in front of the bleachers' back wall.  
% Rod wants to move closer to the action, but Ned wants him to stay 
% out of the range of the cussing.  (Not that it does much good, since 
% Bart does a little of his own.)
%
% There are several near-collisions, much to the disappointment of the 
% fans.

Bart:	[yelling to the cars] Come on, somebody crash!
Homer:	Be patient, son.  A watched car never crashes.
	[true to Homer's word, someone wrecks]  Oh, I missed one!
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% One of the drivers comes in for a pit stop -- fuel, change of tires, 
% and a fresh set of fuzzy dice.  As he leaves, Homer comes in and 
% tries to get service.  When that doesn't work, he hastily pulls out 
% onto the track and causes a multi-car collision.
%
% As part of the day's activities, the girls from Fan-demonium come to 
% entertain the crowd.  Scantily dressed and armed with small cannons, 
% they ask what will be a fateful question:  "Who wants a free T-
% shirt?"  Everyone does, including Marge, until she realizes what 
% she's doing.
%
% The gals use the cannons to shoot T-shirts into the crowd.  Dr. 
% Hibbert catches one.

Dr. Hibbert:	[looking at shirt] Hmm, a Ford urinating on a 
		Chevrolet.
Mrs. Hibbert:	Don't you usually laugh at everything?
Dr. Hibbert:	[seriously] Yes.  Yes, I do.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Lenny calls for a T-shirt, and an incoming tire knocks him over.  
% The bloodthirsty crowd groans when it realizes Lenny isn't hurt.
%
% Homer, shirtless, yells for a free T-shirt.

Homer:	I need a shirt!  Gimmie a shirt!
Ralph:	Mommy has bosoms like that.
Wiggum:	[sarcastic] Yeah, I wish.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Maude needs a break.

Maude:	Neddy, I've had about all I can take of Homer Simpson's 
	torso.  I'll get some hot dogs.
Ned:	No foot-longs!
Maude:	I know, they make you uncomfortable.  [kisses Ned, then 
	goes for the food]
-- Famous last words, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Fan-demonium is about to wind down.

Girl:	[coyly] Well, I guess nobody else wants a T-shirt.
Homer:	That's a damn lie and you know it!  Gimmie a shirt!
Girl:	You heard him, girls.  [they take aim]
Homer:	[uses a ketchup bottle to draw a bull's-eye on his chest]  
	Hey T-shirt, T-shirt, T-shirt.
Girl:	Fire!  [they do, and five or six T-shirts head in Homer's 
	direction]
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Homer sees a bobby pin, and bends over to get it.  At that moment, 
% Maude returns with the hot dogs.  The T-shirts sail over Homer and 
% strike Maude.  The force knocks Maude off-balance, and sends her 
% over the bleacher's retaining wall.  She lands on the hard concrete 
% several stories down.
%
% A crowd instantly materializes to help but there is nothing they can 
% do.  Dr. Hibbert pronounces her dead on the spot.
%
% [End of Act One.  Time:  5:50]
%
% Marge and Homer are still in shock.

Marge:	It's hard to believe we're never going to see Maude again.
Homer:	And poor Ned didn't get a chance to say goodbye.  Well, 
	from now on I'm never going to let you leave the room 
	without telling you how much I love you and how truly 
	special ... [looks at his watch] This is really eating up 
	a lot of time.  Maybe just a pat on the butt.  [pats 
	Marge's butt]  Yeah, that works.
-- An incurable romantic, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Marge reminds Homer that Ned and the boys need their support, and 
% Homer understands.  "I know," he promises, "no more being a jerk."  
% Then, he sheds a tear.
%
% Rev. Lovejoy eulogizes Maude at her funeral.

Lovejoy:	In many ways, Maude Flanders was a supporting player 
		in our lives.  She didn't grab our attention with 
		memorable catchphrases, or comical accents.
Willie:		Aye.
McAllister:	Yar.
Frink:		Oh, glaven, why, glaven?
Lovejoy:	But, whether you noticed her or not, Maude was 
		always there ... and we thought she always would be.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% The Reverend continues.

Lovejoy:	My friends, life is about change.  Just yesterday, 
		Apu was a lonely bachelor.
Apu:		[holding the octuplets] Yes, thank God those days 
		are over.
Lovejoy:	And the Van Houtens were enjoying a storybook 
		marriage.
Kirk:		Yeah, lots of storybooks have witches.
Pyro:		Shut up, Kirk!
Kirk:		[sheepish] Sorry.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% As part of the legal settlement, the Fan-demonium girls are on hand 
% to fire a 21 T-shirt salute.  Dressed in black bikinis and veils, 
% they fire three volleys into the air as Willy plays "Amazing Grace" 
% on the bagpipes.  Homer eagerly grabs a one, and holds it up so we 
% can see the logo:  A cartoon hearse driver with the slogan, "Let 'er 
% R.I.P."
%
% The wake is held at the Simpson house.  Apu offers Ned his 
% sympathies and Maude's frequent squishee points.  Moe also expresses 
% his ... sympathy.

Moe:	Look, Ned, I know we ain't hung out much, what with your 
	insane fear of drinking and me being banned from the 
	church and all but, uh, but that Maude, she was really 
	something.
Ned:	Aw, wasn't she?  Thank you, Moe.  I appreciate that.
Moe:	No, I really mean it, though.  I mean, if it was you that 
	died, I would have been on her so fast ...
Ned:	What are you saying?
Moe:	What, nothing; she was hot.  What?  You can't take a 
	compliment?
Ned:	[sputters] You monster!  [hits Moe repeatedly]
Moe:	[between blows] That's good, let it out.  That's it, let 
	it out.  Send me to Maude, that's it.  Here I come, baby!  
	Oh, yeah!
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Bart redecorates the "REST IN PEACE" cake to read, "REST IN PE  E".  
% Marge taps him on the shoulder and suggests he go play with Rod and 
% Todd.  Bart reluctantly agrees.  The three wind up in the Flanders 
% boys' bedroom.

Bart:	When I'm feeling low, you know what always cheers me up?
Todd:	Is it love?
Rod:	Kindness?
Bart:	Ooh, tough room.  Videogames!  Whaddya got?  [grabs a 
	videogame off the shelf, and reads the title] "Billy 
	Graham's Bible Blaster?"
Rod:	Keep firing; convert the heathens!
	[cut to a pixilated video screen.  Heathens cross the 
	street, as a Bible gun shoots the Holy Book at them.  When 
	a heathen gets hit, he turns into a conservatively dressed 
	man with a halo]
	[cut back to the boys]
Bart:	Got him!
Rod:	No, you just winged him and made him a Unitarian.
Todd:	Look out, Bart!  A gentle Baha'i!
	[cut back to the video screen.  A Baha'i, sitting cross-
	legged and wearing a turban, floats past.  Bart zaps him, 
	and turns him into another suit-wearing conservative]
	[cut back to the boys]
Bart:	All right!  Full conversion!  [puts his arms around Rod 
	and Todd]  Thanks guys, this really cheered me up.
Video:	Second Coming!  Reload, reload!
Todd:	Can we play now?
Bart:	We are playing.  We're a team.
Rod +
 Todd:	[pause] Yay!
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Ned isn't as easy to console.  Homer, making a sincere effort to be 
% helpful walks him home, through the yard, past the sprinkler, which 
% Homer has "borrowed."  Ned tries to reclaim it, but Homer peacefully 
% says that the sprinkler is gone now, and it is time to move on.
%
% Homer continues to be helpful, more or less, all the way to Ned's 
% bedroom.  He soothes Ned to sleep by imitating a white noise 
% machine, and quietly leaves the room (but not before kissing him on 
% the forehead).  In his sleep, Ned reaches for his wife.
%
% The sound of stones hitting the bedroom window awakens Homer.  He 
% goes to the window and finds Ned in his yard.  Homer surmises 
% Flanders wants a rock fight, and gets his bucket of war rocks ready, 
% but it isn't necessary.  Ned just needs someone to talk to.  Homer 
% goes downstairs, but grabs a handful of stones from the bucket, just 
% in case.
%
% Ned and Homer sit on the swings in the backyard and talk.

Ned:	I just keep replaying the whole thing in my head.  I can't 
	believe my last words to Maude were, "No foot-longs."
Homer:	Yep, it would have been a lot better if you had said, "I 
	love you," or "You're special."  You know, something sweet 
	instead of that hot dog crack.
Ned:	If I'd only been a gentleman, and got the hot dogs myself, 
	she'd still be here.
Homer:	Now, now, now, don't beat yourself up.  I'm the one who 
	drove her out of her seat.  I'm the one who provoked the 
	lethal barrage of T-shirts.  I'm the one who parked in the 
	ambulance zone, preventing any possible resuscitation.  
	[notices Ned glaring at him] Yeah, I, uh, but there's no 
	point in playing the blame game.
Ned:	Ah, you're right.  I've just got to work through the 
	grief.  There's not going to be an easy answer.
Homer:	Easy answer, eh?
-- The wheels are turning, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% The next day, Homer videotapes Ned clipping his hedges.

Bart:	Why are you taping Flanders, Dad?
Homer:	You'll see.
Bart:	Do you even have a job anymore?
Homer:	I think it's pretty obvious that I don't.
-- That answers that question, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Lisa and Homer use a video editor to assemble the raw footage.  
% Homer insists on using star wipes to move from scene to scene, over 
% Lisa's objections.
%
% Star wipe to Flanders' den.  Homer walks in, bearing a videotape.

Homer:	So, how are you doing, Ned?
Ned:	Ah, it's been a hard couple of months, but I feel like 
	I've turned a corner.
Homer:	Well that's all gonna change, thanks to this tape.  [holds 
	up a videotape]
Ned:	Tape?
Homer:	Now, the audio needs some tweaking and there's some 
	footage of Maggie being born that I couldn't get rid of 
... anyway, enjoy. [puts the tape in the VCR]

	[cut to the screen, which shows the sun rising over the 
	city]
	[on tape] Single women of Springfield, your prayers have 
	been Flanswered ... Ned Flanswered, that is.  [head shot 
	of Ned spins in to overlay the city]
Ned:	[real life] Is this a dating video?
Homer:	Shush.

	[back to the video, a shot of Ned's house]
Homer:	[on tape] What would you say about a man who owns his own 
	house ... [Ned pulls up in the driveway] and his own car?  
	That's Ned Flanders.
	[cut to a shot of Ned at home]
	A man who's not afraid to cry.
	[offscreen] Hey, Ned!
	[a hand reaches in and sprays Ned with something.  Ned 
	screams and winces with pain]
Ned:	[real-life] So that's why you Maced me.
Homer:	[chuckles] Yeah.

	[back to the video, showing Ned at an ATM]
Homer:	[on tape] Ned does everything with class, whether it's 
	punching in his ATM code ...  [a close-up reveals Ned's 
	code]
	[cut to a shot of Ned showering.  His private parts have 
	been digitized to keep them private]
	... or keeping clean in the shower.
Ned:	[real life] Homer!

	[back to the video, a shot of Chief Wiggum]
Homer:	But don't take my word for it.  Listen to this 
	testimonial.
Wiggum:	[on tape] Oh I would date Ned in a second if I was a woman 
	or gay.  He looks like a cuddler, that Ned.  I, I like 
	that.  I like to be held, I like to be pampered.
	[a gunshot is heard, an alarm goes off, and tires screech 
	away in the distance.  Wiggum is still lost in thought]
	[cut to a shot of Carl, Moe, and Lenny standing in front 
	of Moe's tavern]
Homer:	So if you're tired of dating the same old losers ...
Carl:	What are you doing, Homer?
Homer:	... step up to the best.  [shot of Ned's muscular chest]  
	Ned Flanders, the man with the chest.
	[patriotic music plays, and then an abrupt cut to Marge in 
	labor with Maggie]
Ned:	[real life] Ew.
-- The ending *does* need some work, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Homer figures that when Ned's video hits the dating service, 
% eligible women will beat a path to Ned's door.  Ned balks; for him, 
% it is too soon to begin dating.  "That's great," Homer says, "Chicks 
% dig sensitivity."  He asks if Bart, who has been filming the whole 
% conversation, got the shot to add to the video.
%
% Some time later, Ned plays Scrabble (TM), but with no suitable 
% partners, he has to take both turns at the board.  Looking down at 
% the board, he notices that he has subconsciously chosen words that 
% reflect his loneliness.  Perhaps it is time to Homer's video in, 
% after all.  He takes it to the mailbox and drops it in.  As he walks 
% away, Homer peeks out of the mailbox and giggles, knowing that his 
% idea has paid off.  Then he realizes he's stuck in the box.
%
% [End of Act Two.  Time:  14:09]
%
% Several women have seen Ned's tape and are interested, says the 
% dating service.  A clerk provides Ned with their videos, and says 
% that he's free to root around in the one-nighter bin.  The Comic 
% Book Guy has beaten him to those tapes, however.

Ned:	Homer, I'm having second thoughts.  This feels so disloyal 
	to Maude.
Homer:	Oh, wake up, Ned.  You think Maude isn't dating in Heaven?
Ned:	You think she would?
Homer:	How could she not?  The place is full of eligible 
	bachelors.  John Wayne, Tupac Shakur, Sherlock Holmes ...
Ned:	[chuckles] Sherlock Holmes is a character.
Homer:	He sure is.  [wolf growl]
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Ned settles down at home with the tapes.  Candidate #1 is a Wharton 
% MBA who effortlessly ticks off what she considers her most datable 
% qualities.  The words on her tape glide seamlessly into her speech 
% face-to-face with Ned at a restaurant.  The date ends when a fax -- 
% she carries a portable fax machine on her leg -- arrives, with the 
% message that she is indicted.  She suggests they try again come 
% August.
%
% Candidate #2 is our own Edna Krabappel.  Ned finishes up dinner at 
% her place.

Ned:		Mmm, dinner was delicious, Edna.  But I can't shake 
		the feeling that you're just using me to make 
		Principal Skinner jealous.
Edna:		Oh, please, I don't care what Mr. "Engaged-to-be-
		Engaged" thinks.  Hear that, Seymour?
		[cut to the phone, which is off the hook]
Skinner:	[on the phone] Edna, this is childish.
Edna:		Fine, then hang up.
Skinner:	I will hang up when *he* leaves.
Ned:		[sighs]
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Maybe the third try's the charm.  This date takes place by the lake.  
% Candidate #3 is Diane, an attractive woman walking a dog -- and 
% carrying some baggage.

Ned:	Well, Diane, I sure enjoyed chatting with you about your 
	problems with your mother.
Diane:	[singsong, to the dog] Did you hear that, Foofie?  Sounds 
	like somebody wuvs us.  Yes it does.
Ned:	[laughs somewhat uneasily] Yeah.  Well, maybe I'll call 
	you again sometime
Diane:	Ooh, Foofie doesn't like the sound of that maybe, 'cause 
	him's a commitment dog.  Isn't him?
	[cut to Ned paddling for his life in one of the lake's 
	swan boats]
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Ned pedals the boat all the way to the Simpson home.  He tells Maude 
% and Homer that he probably isn't ready for the modern dating scene.  
% Homer tries to buck up his spirits, reminding him how the floozies 
% they married in Vegas fell for him.  This comes as a surprise to 
% Marge, who still hadn't been told about that episode.  (Looks like 
% Homer came up with a good cover story after all!)
%
% At home, Ned prays.

Ned:	Lord, I never question you, but I've been wondering if 
	your decision to take Maude was ... well, wrong.  Unless 
	this was part of your divine plan.  Could you just give me 
	some kind of sign?  [nothing happens] Anything!  [still no 
	sign] Oh, and after all that church chocolate I bought, 
	which by the way was gritty and had that white stuff on 
	it.  Well, I've had it!
	[turns around a picture of God he keeps on his nightstand]
-- That's Ned in the corner, losing his religion, "Alone Again,
   Natura-Diddly"

% Sunday morning dawns.  Rod and Todd rush into Ned's bedroom, wearing 
% their Sunday finest.

Todd:	Daddy, get up!  You'll be late for church.
Ned:	Oh, you boys can go with the Simpsons.  I'm not going to 
	church today.
Rod +
 Todd:	[gasp in horror]
Ned:	That's right.  And I may not go to church tomorrow.
	[Rod and Todd flee]
	[to God] No, I'm not kidding.  I'm going to sit right here 
	and miss church.  You just watch.
	[smash cut to Ned driving his car and looking Heavenward]
	Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry!
-- Or maybe not, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Meanwhile, at church, Rev. Lovejoy introduces a Christian band, 
% Kovenant.  Lisa finds something familiar about them.

Lisa:	Hey, isn't that the bass player from Satanica?
Marge:	[squints] I think it is.
-- Uh, fans of theirs?  "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Ned arrives at church and hears the sound of electric guitars, and 
% fears the worst.  He runs in to find Kovenant, a five-piece band 
% with an attractive lady singer, on the altar.

Rachel:	This is a love song about a dude I met in a sleazy motel.
Ned:	[gasps]
Rachel:	A dude named God.
Ned:	[relieved] Oh.
Rachel:	[singing, in a country-rock style]
	In a motel room in Delacroix,
	I was drinkin' like a Dartmouth boy,
	and thinkin' 'bout the wrong turns that I took.
	[quick pan across one of the pews, showing Marge and the 
	kids enjoying the show, and Homer snoozing]
	Well, I woke up on the puke green floor,
	and opened up a dresser drawer.
	Lookin' for a bottle but instead I found a book.
Lenny:	She's talking about the Bible.
Carl:	So, she's good-looking.  Shut up.
Lenny:	You shut up.
Rachel:	[singing] A book about a man.
	A book about the Dude who lives above.
	A book about a man
	who drives a pick-up full of sweet, sweet love.
	[brief cut to Jasper playing the spoons]
	Now if you think he doesn't care,
	or maybe that he isn't there,
	it's not too late to see how wrong you are.
	[brief cut to Ned smiling]
	So when your soul has gone astray,
	just let God be your Triple-A.
	He'll tow you to salvation and He'll overhaul your heart.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% After the services, Marge and Todd tell Ned they're glad he decided 
% to come.  Ned spots Rachel trying to load heavy equipment into the 
% band's van, and goes to help.  Marge tells Homer to go help, but 
% Homer has suddenly become religious enough to forswear working on 
% Sundays.
%
% Ned and Rachel load the equipment onto the van, and close the door.

Ned:	That was a lovely song.  You really got to me.
Rachel:	You've been through some rough times yourself?
Ned:	I, I recently lost my wife.
Rachel:	I'm really sorry to hear that.  We just lost our drummer
	-- to a Pentecostal ska band.  Uh, I know it's not the 
	same but ...
Ned:	No, I hear you're saying.  It's always hard to replace 
	someone.
Rachel:	Yeah.  My name's Rachel Jordan.  If you feel like talking, 
	maybe we could grab a coffee.
Ned:	Well, uh, that sounds real nice Rachel but, uh, I'm ah, 
	I'm not quite ...
Rachel:	I understand.  Listen, we're heading out on tour with the 
	Monsters of Christian Rock.  Maybe when we get back you 
	and I could get together.
	[the rest of the band shows up, and get into the van]
Ned:	Maybe we can.  My name's Ned Flanders, and I'm here every 
	week -- rain or shine.
-- The healing begins, "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"

% Fade to black.  Instead of the normal closing theme, we hear 
% Kovenant, singing different words to their church song.

Rachel:	It's a show about Ned.
	About him losin' his sweet wife.
	She landed on her head.
	But now it's time to get on with his life.
-- "Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"
%
% [End of Act Three.  Time (including Rachel's song):  20:08]

==============================================================================
> Contributors
==============================================================================
{al}  Andrew Levine
{am}  Alan Michelson
{bjr} Benjamin Robinson
{cg}  Curtis Gibby
{ddg} Don Del Grande
{dj}  Darrel Jones
{dmc} Daniel McConnell
{dt}  Dick Trickle
{em}  Earl Ma
{hl}  Haynes Lee
{jc}  Jeff Cross
{jg}  Jeremy Gallen
{jg2} Joe Green
{jk}  Joe Klemm
{jp}  Jerry P
{jv}  Javier Vera
{kw}  Kurt Williams
{mar} Mark Richey
{nd}  Nathan DeHoff
{pdc} Paul D. Canniff
{reg} Richard E. Green
{th}  Tony Hill

==============================================================================
> Legal Mumbo Jumbo
==============================================================================
This episode capsule is Copyright 2000 The Simpsons Archive.  It is not to be
redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current
maintainer (capsules@snpp.com).  All quoted material and episode summaries
remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox.  All
other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors.  The
Quote and Scene Summary itself is Copyright 2000 Benjamin Robinson, with the
Kovenant lyrics provided by Curtis Gibby.  (Thanks, Curtis!)  This capsule has
been brought to you by Springfield Raceway.

This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie,
Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are
today.