HOMR Written by Al Jean Directed by Mike Anderson ============================================================================== Production code: BABF22 Original Airdate on FOX: 7-Jan-2001 Capsule revision B (27-Dec-03) ============================================================================== > "TV Guide" Synopsis ============================================================================== None submitted. [If you use these summaries to determine if you found the right capsule, here's a TV Guide-like synopsis: Medical science reveals the reason for Homer's world-class foolishness: a crayon lodged in his brain. Homer becomes a new and smarter man when it's removed, but with great intelligence comes with a cost -- Ed.] ============================================================================== > Title sequence ============================================================================== Blackboard: NETWORK TV IS NOT DEAD NETWORK TV IS NOT at cutoff Couch: Five pneumatic tubes are arrayed above the couch, each large enough for a person to slide through. One by one, the Simpsons drop through the tubes onto their place on the couch, except for Bart. Philip J. Fry (from "Futurama," Matt Groening's other show) shoots out the final tube. Seconds later, he's sucked back up and replaced by Bart. ============================================================================== > Did You Notice... ============================================================================== ... the animation festival has a "Veggie Tales" booth? Don Del Grande: ... there was a Happy Little Elves booth at a "sick & twisted" festival? ... there were also Lance Murdock and Poochie booths there? ... Bart said "Japanimation" instead of "Anime"? ... in the first exterior shot of SNPP, the two crow calls matched the blinking red lights? ... Homer does a pretty good Lisa impression? ... Homer trusted the SNPP mail room to deliver mail addressed to the NRC without opening it and letting Burns know about it? ... Homer's claimed IQ is less than Lisa's? ... Moe's surgery phone number is 800-555-0000? Daniel L. Dreibelbis: ... the stockbroker Homer goes to is using a lime green Apple iMac? ... this is the first time Barney has been seen inside Moe's Tavern and drinking a beverage since "Days Of Wine and D'oh-ses"? (Do note that he's actually acting more sober than normal -- or at least he was at "Professor Barney" stage.) ... during the flashback as Homer was shoving the crayons up his nose, there were crayons coming out of his ears? Jean Fontaine: ... Back at SNPP, "smart Homer" is humming the melody of the 1st movement from Bach's Brandenburg Concerto #3? Joe Green: ... CBG's "WORST CONVENTION EVER" T-shirt? Darrel Jones: ... the guy "accidentally" placed on OFF's couch during the opening looks an awful lot like Fry from "Futurama"? ... Homer's "normal" IQ is only 55? It takes a guy with about a hundred more IQ points (like me :) to notice that. ... the movie looks more like an episode of a really dumb TV sitcom than a movie? Joe Klemm: ... the Iron Giant poster at the convention (A former Simpsons writer [animation director, actually -- Ed.] did the film)? ... the Wallace and Gromit poster at the convention? ... this is the first time stop-motion animation appeared on the show? Haynes Lee: ... it took three calendar years to show the entire BABF production series? (1999, 2000, 2001) ... it also took two millennia? ... this is Futurama's Fry's first appearance on Fox in over a month? Chad Lehman: ... Maggie laughing at Homer's "go home to our families" joke? Alie Molino: ... there is a sign for "Cel-Outs," "Poochie" (apparently and Radioactive Man? ... Ned has no objection to the violence [in "Gravey and Jobriath"]? ... Homer withdraws his life savings at 12:10PM? ... the cow bell breaks into five pieces? ... the symbol of two little green footprints is in 6-year-old Homer's bedroom, and it's just like the one on teenage Homer's shirt during the flashback in Homerpalooza? ... Ned carries a lighter? ... you can HEAR Lenny's skin flakes hitting the ground? Benjamin Robinson: ... Lisa makes a bee-line for the "Happy Little Elves" booth, where she picks up a cel? ... while he enjoys the cigarette, smoke comes out of what remains of Scratchy's arm? ... only 500 shares of Animotion were issued? Maybe that's why they went bankrupt! ... Lisa's vegetarianism is still driving a wedge between her and Marge? ... Barney's coffee mug at the tavern? I guess his transformation in "Days of Wine and D'oh'ses (BABF14)" is going to stick. ... Homer has a Bose Wave stereo? ... the "Gravey and Jobriath" sequence was done by Chiodo Brothers Productions, Inc.? Aaron R. Teitlebaum: ... Catbus from "My Neighbor Totoro" in the convention hall? Leo Tokarski: ... apparently, Homer still has his computer from CABF02? (how else could he have bought the cowbell on eBay?) ============================================================================== > Voice Credits ============================================================================== - Starring - Dan Castellaneta (Homer, Jobriath, Voiceover artist [?], Itchy, Barney, Ozmodiar, Inspector, Priest, Groom 1 [?]) - Julie Kavner (Marge, Patty) - Nancy Cartwright (Bart, Gravey, Nelson, Polly) - Yeardley Smith (Lisa) - Hank Azaria (Meganaut, Comic Book Guy, Prof. Frink, Carl, Moe, Scientist 1, Groom 2 [?], Wedding Usher, Movie Usher) - Harry Shearer (Ned, Director, Announcer, Scratchy, Louie, Lenny, Teller, Kent Brockman, Hibbert, Skinner, Burns, McAllister) - Also Starring - Pamela Hayden (Rod Flanders, Boy) - Tress MacNeille (Princess Tempura, Woman, Quoter, Scientist 2) ============================================================================== > Movie (and other) references ============================================================================== + "Futurama" (TV series) {jk} - air tubes transport family to couch, with Fry making a cameo ["Which is probably the most exposure he's had all season," writes {bjr}] + Spike & Mike's Sick & Twisted Festival of Animation (anthology of animated short subjects) {ddg} - the Simpsons visit the similarly-named Sick, Twisted, F***ed-Up Animation Festival - Micronauts (toy line) {jg2} - the term "Meganaut" may refer to this + Transformers (toy franchise) - Bart transforms this to, "Transformazoid" [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed. + "Davey and Goliath" (TV series) - "Gravey and Jobriath" a bent version [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] ~ Jobriath (pop music artist) {jl} - the particular naming of "Gravey & Jobriath" may be a reference to this blip on the pop music scene + "From Here to Eternity" (movie) - Itchy and Scratchy spoof this as "From Here To Infirmity" + "The Jack Benny Show" (radio and TV series) {jk2} - that servant was actually a reference to Rochester, a black servant on the show, including his really low gravelly voice [{al} adds that he was "played by Eddie Anderson, who portrayed Uncle Peter in 'Gone With The Wind.'"] - Hanna-Barberra's Wally Gator (cartoon character) {dj} + Hanna-Barberra's Snagglepuss (cartoon character) {hl} - Disney's Bonkers (cartoon character) {dj} - Felix the Cat (cartoon character) {dj} - the "poorly-voiced" cartoon characters look similar to them + "The Honeymooners" (TV series) {jg2} - the leopard character is dressed up like Ralph Kramden + "The Flintstones" (TV series) - ripping off Jackie Gleason {jc} - and promoting cigarettes (!) like Itchy & Scratchy [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] {jk} - a Great Gazoo-like character appears [See "Comments" section, aw, you get the idea -- Ed.] - this time, he also calls Homer a "dum-dum", like Gazoo called Fred and Barney on the show {dj} + Animotion (80s pop group) {jg2} - company called "Animotion, Inc." + "The Godfather" (movie) {jg2} - Homer: "I'm gonna make you an offer you can't refuse!" + "Laugh-In" (TV series) {bjr} - he also imitates Edith Ann, one of Lily Tomlin's characters from this show [{bjr writes, "Credit really goes to the CC folks, who identified this as an Edith Ann impression"] - "The Price is Right" (TV game show) {bjr} - as a finale, Homer paraphrases Bob Barker's "Have your pets spayed or neutered" tagline - "The Naked Gun" (movie) {jk} - character not realizing the audio from a trip to the bathroom is being broadcast [See -- you got it -- the "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] + T.G.I. Friday's ("theme" restaurant chain) - I.P.O. Friday's a parody + "King Kong" (movie) - appears, for reasons only Homer would find sensible, in his visualization of how stocks work ~ Way of the Gun" (movie) {ek} - Homer's money-making plan involving Marge becoming a surrogate mother to earn money follows the same as one of the main characters' + "Flowers for Algernon" (book) {hl} - premise of episode similar to movie about a simpleton who becomes a genius from a scientific experiment + "Charly" (movie) - the "R" in the title was written backwards, like the title for this episode - this movie was based on "Flowers from Algernon," and a reference to one can be considered a reference to the other - before the intelligence experiment, Charly consistently lost to a lab rat in a maze test (cf. Homer and the button test) + section 8 (military insanity discharge) {jc} - one of the researchers asks to enlarge section 8 of Homer's head X-ray + "Runaway Bride" (movie) - "Pretty Woman" (movie) {jc} - movie involving marriage starring Julia Roberts and Richard Gere + "Who Wants to be a Millionaire?" (TV series) - the "Is that your final answer?" tagline is everywhere, including the Julia Roberts movie ============================================================================== > Previous episode references ============================================================================== - Past "Davey and Goliath" refs {tr2} - [7F13] Homer is listening to D&G on the stolen cable. - [8F16] Maude thinks a talking dog is blasphemous, won't let R&T watch it. (Side thought -- now that Maude is dead, is Ned more lenient on R&T's TV viewing?) - [8F23] Flanders' doorbell - [AABF14] SLH talks like Goliath {rm} - [7F21] Characters from a kids' show ("Radioactive Man") pitch cigarettes {cj} - [8F04], [4F07] That Rubik's cube finally gets solved {bjr} - [8F21], [5F10] Someone imitates Marge's voice {bjr} - [9F04] "King Kong" is parodied {jg2} - [1F06] Someone assures us cartoons don't have to reflect reality ... and is immediately proven correct {bjr} - [3F18] Everybody gets to "Haw-Haw" at Nelson {am} - [3F21] Little green footprint symbol {am} - [4F04] Spalding Gray mentioned {am} - [4F05] "Libary," rather than "library," is said - [4F12] Poochie {am} - [4F12] Homer lends his voice to a cartoon dog {am} - [4F20], [BABF22] Great-Gazoo-like green alien appears {am} - [4F20] Great Gazoo-like character appears {bjr} - [4F24] "Li-berry" is said instead of "library" {jg2} - [AABF14] "Davey and Goliath" parodied {bjr} - [AABF14] "David & Goliath" is referenced {jg2} - [AABF17] a King Kong-like animal is caged on stage {am} - [AABF20] Bart and Lisa watch anime {jg2} - [AABF22] The Screaming Monkey Research Facility looks like the Pharm Team building {jg2} - [AABF22] A Simpson becomes a test subject for drugs {jg2} - [BABF09] CBG wears a "WORST ___ EVER" T-shirt {jg2} - [BABF14] Barney gets hooked on coffee {bjr} - [BABF18] Rick Dees mentioned {am} ============================================================================== > Freeze frame fun ============================================================================== - Animation convention marquee {bjr} TOTALLY SICK, TWISTED, F***ED UP ANIMATION FESTIVAL CHILDREN HALF-PRICE <- in red - (Some of) The booths in the opening shot {bjr} - Happy Little Elves - Chesire cat/bus thingy - Itchy & Scratchy Show - Lance Murdock cartoon - Booths the family walks by (from left to right) - Happy Little Elves - Radioactive Man - Cel-Out - Veggie Tales (just a picture, not literally the words, "Veggie Tales") - History of Animation - Trek Toons (With the Enterprise as an animation table) - (later) Poochie - Comic Book Guy's Shirt {am} ______________ / \ / \ / | WORST | \ | | | | |__| CONVENTION |__| | | | EVER! | | | |_____________| - Itchy & Scratchy booth {bjr} CLASSIC CARTOON COMMERCIALS - Itchy & Scratchy clapper {bjr} ITCHY & SCRATCHY FROM HERE TO INFIRMITY - Homer's stockbrokers {bjr} I. P. O. FRIDAY'S - Stock certificate {bjr} +----------------------+ | ANIMOTION INC. | <- "MOTION" is in italic print | | | 500 | | SHARES | | | | CERTIFICATE OF STOCK | +----------------------+ - Sign at Medical Research Lab {am} +-------------------------------------------+ | | | (in red) SCREAMING MONKEY | | (in black) MEDICAL RESEARCH | | CENTER | | | +-------------------------------------------+ - Medicine Bottle Label {am} +-----------+ | Diet Drug | | | | Z-3 | | | +-----------+ - The book that Cletus uses to crack the turtle {am} +-------------+ | TRINITY | | | | by | | | | LEON URIS | | | +-------------+ - Fire inspector's shirt {am} ______________ / / / | FIRE | | | INSPECTOR | | |__| |__| | | | | | | |_____________| - Movie marquee {bjr} JULIA ROBERTS IN LOVE IS NICE - Signs Homer walks past SMART PEOPLE DUM-DUM NOT CLUB WELCOME LUNKHEADZ DISNEY A PLACE FOR DROOLING STORE - Moe's business card {bjr} "That's Right, [Moe] I'm a Surgeon." --------------------------- Moe Szyslak (800) 555 0000 ============================================================================== > Animation, continuity, and other goofs ============================================================================== + Todd thinks talking dogs are blasphemous [8F16], but enjoys watching "Gravey & Jobriath". ["He saw the error of his ways," writes {cl}] {ah} = There were no "spots" on Homer's mouth, yet the animated dog's lip movements matched Homer's. {ddg} c Homer's stock initially goes up, "one and one half [points]." The closed- caption reports a slightly more modest gain of, "one and one- eighth." {bjr} * If Homer was the only Animotion stockholder, how did the stock price change? A stock price depends on what somebody pays for it. {ddg} * How can Homer be the only stockholder with only 500 shares? {jj} * And if he is the only stockholder, then he owns the company. How can they go super duper bankrupt without his knowing it? {jj} + Barney was already a guinea pig in 9F02. {hl} + Homer couldn't find the food on the conveyor belt by smelling or "hearing" it, and his sense of smell and hearing for food is supposed to be unnaturally strong (Nelson: "your old man's nose is great" Bart: "That's nothing-- he can actually HEAR pudding!")? {am} + I'm pretty sure we've seen Homer's head X-ray on one of this display lights, without anyone's hands blocking it. (But kudos for at least trying to explain the inconsistency!) {bjr} c Homer says he put the crayons in his nose when he was six. However, the closed-captioner interpreted the last word as "sick." {rm} + This episode's explanation of Homer's foolishness is contrary to the "Simpson gene" theory established in "Lisa the Simpson." [See "Comments" section for more -- Ed.] + Homer mentions going to the library with Lisa. But In the episode where he idolizes Thomas Edison, he says that he can't go to the "Big People" library anymore due to some "unpleasantness." What's with that? {vbd} + Homer couldn't really have disproven God's existence, since God Himself has appeared on OFF on numerous occasions. {jg2} c When Homer is putting leaflets (on which he has printed the proof of the non-existence of God) under people's car windows he is whistling the "Battle Hymn of the Republic." What the closed captioning had him whistling, however, was "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing." {rsw} = When Homer gets kicked out of the movies, and the bouncer tells him to take his plot hole spotting elsewhere, the handles on the movie theater door are different sizes when the door closes. {ag2} * Homer said his IQ went up by 50 points, and that it was now 105. However, there's no possible way his "dumb" IQ could be as low as 55. {ddg} + I thought Dr. Nick (or even maybe Dr. Hibbert) are Springfield's unlicensed surgeons. {hl} c Lisa says she's missing the powder blue crayon, but the CC reads, "royal blue." {bjr} ============================================================================== > Reviews ============================================================================== Don Del Grande: Let's see, Act I was a storyline that had nothing to do with the main plot; the first storyline pretty much stopped cold in Act II (never to be mentioned again) when the main story began; Homer does something strange that has something to do with it, but in Act III things return to normal and Homer and Lisa share a bond. I've described both one of my favorite episodes ("Lisa's Pony") and this one, but for some reason Homer acting smart isn't as funny as Homer working the night shift at Kwik-E-Mart (well, that and now it's Homer rather than Lisa who has to "do the right thing"). Maybe I have seen this type of storyline one too many times ... (B) Daniel L. Dreibelbis: GREAT opening at the cartoon convention, this will be remembered as a classic. Too bad most of the rest of the episode tended to be ponderous. Still, there were some bright spots throughout (the testing facility, the octo-parrot, Flanders suppressing Homer's discovery about God). And you have to admit that that final minute with Homer and Lisa at the end was touching. Seeing as what was the source material for this episode, they could've done better. (C) Joe Green: This was the best OFF episode I've seen in a VERY long time. Like a lot of shows lately, it took a bit too long before setting up the plot, but the animation convention provided some of the best jokes. It also benefited from not having any stupid plot tangents or a "What the hell was THAT?" ending. (A+) Carl Johnson: A terrible first act turns quickly into a mediocre episode. It was pleasant seeing Homer as a normal person, but it was like no one could think of a good enough reason for him to return to ... abnormal. Maybe if the first act wasn't wasted on being terrible, the other two could have actually gone somewhere. (D+) Darrel Jones: Another fun episode. Great for bawl-out-loud laughter. Not so great on character development, though the Homer and Lisa scenes near the end were nice. No classic, but solid for Season 12. A bit cartoony, but I would have expected this from the premise. I give it 8/10 (B+) Chad Lehman: This was a very funny episode, though it seemed to lack a deeper story. [...] Despite this episode seeming to have it all (even another peek into Homer's thoughts), they could have filled out the story more-- 'twas a little thin. More of Homer as a genius, and some more connection with Lisa could have made the episode the first bona-fide classic in years. Bart seems non-existent, and Marge only slightly less so. The somewhat thin plot, and minor details took the shine off at least an A episode ... Not all LOLs were sidesplitters; but, the "extended warranty" thing had me rolling. Good form, Al Jean. (B+) Adam Long: Hmmm ... this one's tough to put a grade on. [...] It seemed that the writers made it too much of a point to show the audience that Homer is dumb by making him dumb to the point of annoyance. The show is in its 12th Season, we know that he's dumb. When he got smart it picked up with some great stuff, like his "proving God doesn't exist," and Flanders's reaction. But then the same problem set in, he was now smart to the point of annoyance. You'd think if he was so smart he'd know what would make everyone angry with him. Watching Moe perform his "surgery" was just painful, but the bit at the end with Homer's note to Lisa was a nice touch. So, it was a mixed bag with this one, but I think there was more good than bad, so I'll give it a (C+) Michael Nusair: When I first read the description for this episode a few months ago, I didn't think it was real. It just sounded too ludicrous to be a real episode. And when I found out that it actually was real, I wasn't expecting much. Boy, was I wrong. Everything about this episode was done extremely well. It was full of laughs (too many to mention). Homer's transformation into an intelligent person -- and then back to dumb -- was done very well, I thought. All the characterization was done well -- Mr. Burns was actually evil (as it should be), unlike in his last few appearances. I'm not sure how much I like the fact that Barney is actually sober now, but you can hardly fault that to this episode. (A) Mike Reed: The long-awaited end to the BABF-- series brought us what may be one of the best ones. HOMR was worth the wait, even if it started off very slowly, and stayed too long in the animation bit. Once they got to Homer being smart, the plot picked up nicely (with the exception of the Flanders scene, which was stupid and aggravating.) But, it's Act III that draws my attention. The ending where Lisa reads Homer's letter was priceless. That was great, picking up an uneven plotline and pushing it into future classic episode territory. (A-) Robin Steinmann: This episode featured some of the perhaps most heartwarming and deepest emotional moments for some seasons. On the other hand it was also not too short on the funny side, although I strongly disliked Barney additional ears. The message that intelligent people have it hard in a simplistic environment was handle quite well during most parts, although it might seem to anti-intellectual people that this episode proved that too bright people only cause trouble, destroy jobs, and feel superior to everyone else. And even though I accept that Homer could not stay clever beyond this episode (Or could he?), and the way they made him stupid again (his cowardly, but partly understandable decision combined with the explaining letter for Lisa) was probably the best solution. I was still feeling a bit sad for Lisa and Homer. (B) Robert Todd: I can honestly say that the writers put more thought into the parody of Japanese cartoons, than into the rest of this unoriginal and embarrassing piece of crap. (F) Yours Truly: Homer learns first-hand the meaning of the adage, "Be careful what you wish for." I was wishing for a show that capitalized on its potential to be both poignant and funny. Instead the writers decided to go for maximum humor, and succeeded. The animation festival, the explanation for Homer's early stupidity, the unexpected troubles of intelligence, and the final Homer-Lisa scene all worked well. The quick tour of animation styles at the festival is another plus for this show. My big quibble: The writers missed a good opportunity to use Dr. Nick near the end of the show. Someone must have had a crayon up his nose for that one. "HOMR" may be a little shallow and un-intellectual, but it's entertaining and ultimately wins you over -- rather like Homr himself. (A) AVERAGE GRADE: B (2.95) Std Dev.: 1.1747 (15 reviews computed) ============================================================================== > Comments and other observations ============================================================================== >> Meta-reference corner Benjamin Robinson: * Homer says animation is better than "whatever the alternative is." We know the alternative is "live-action," but of course to the Simpsons, animation *is* live-action. * Bart makes the "cartoons don't have to make sense" argument, right before the Great Gazoo (or is that Ozmodiar?) pops out of nowhere. >> "Network TV is not dead" Haynes Lee opines: I disagree with that statement. Many network shows are cancelled after only three airings and there is only a small crop who can produce 100 episodes for syndication. If The Simpsons ever went off the air who would Fox start their Sunday night lineup with? Many of the recently failed or on hiatus animation shows are "God, the Devil and Bob", "Mission Hill", "Clerks", "Family Guy", "The Critic", "Duckman", PJ's. "Dilbert" remains buried somewhere on UPN while KOTH and especially Futurama frequently gets pre-empted by NFL football. Benjamin Robinson adds: It's no secret in the industry that ratings for the networks have steadily declined. Meanwhile, the audience for cable has increased by almost exactly the amount of the networks' loss. Some critics blame the tepid quality of network shows. Others figure that cable's ability to cater to niche audiences have slowly chipped away at the nets' base of mainstream viewers. The trend doesn't isn't likely to reverse any time soon, and some observers feel that network TV is obsolete, or on its way to obsolescence. Note for overseas viewers, some of whom only get "The Simpsons" on cable: In the United States, "The Simpsons" is a network show. Oh, I should also mention that the popularity Internet has also caught blame for waning TV ratings. So save this post and get of the computer now! You've got TV to watch! >> The Cartoon Craze Jeff Cross: During 1998 and 1999 there was an infatuation with animated cartoon shows in primetime, such as "Dilbert," "God, The Devil & Bob," and "Family Guy." With the wave of game shows and voyeuristic "reality" shows in 2000, they were cancelled. >> Anime or Else! Darrel Jones explains: The "Transformazoids" cartoon was example of a Japanese anime, which is the term preferred over Bart's use of "Japanimation". It's a style of animation based on Japanese comic book art. The US didn't invent the comic book any more than they invented apple pie; Japanese comic books have been around since long before the US even existed. Japanese animation styles are distinctly different than the kind most Americans are used to. They're usually typified by large eyes, tiny noses, a fairly crude drawing style, lips opening wide while talking and moving indistinctly, and characters with unusual hair colors (done because Japan is less ethnically diverse than the US; most Japanese have black hair). The characters in "Transfomazoids" actually looked and acted somewhat like anime characters, far more so than the original "Transformers" characters. While popular in Japan about as long as animated TV programming has existed in that country, most Americans probably didn't experience much of it before the 1980's, with the possible exception of "Speed Racer". The anime shows which do hit American TV screens tend to be children's programming, something of a shame since the unseen Japanese shows are frequently more enjoyable for adults. Anime enjoys a degree of cult popularity in the US, however; any decent video store should sell some anime. Furthermore, after years of being relegated to syndication, a few animes are being seen on American network television. Currently, one can see "Sailor Moon" and the old favorite "Speed Racer" on Cartoon Network, "Digimon" on Fox Kids, and "Card Captors" and every tyke's favorite "Pokemon" on Kids WB. (BTW, if you wanna see one of these, I recommend "Pokemon". Despite the kiddie themes, I find it good viewing for adults, too.) Joe Klemm adds: In some cases, anime, unlike most American cell cartoons, can be considered a form of art. In fact, Princess Mononoke, an anime film, is the highest grossing Japanese film in its country of origin, just behind Titanic. >> It's Finally Official! The Simpsons Are Going Downhill!! Benjamin Robinson: The Great Gazoo/Ozmodiar joke was cute, but it might have given long- time viewers a chill. In an interview, Matt Groening complained that kibitzers at Fox were trying to "dumb down" the series to make it more appealing to children. (Someone evidently forgot to tell them that vast herds of children were already watching the show as-is.) Groening said that if we ever saw a little green alien, like the Great Gazoo from "The Flintstones" on the show, this would be a sign they succeeded. Fortunately, what we saw here was just a joke on cartoon un-reality. I think ... Haynes Lee adds: This was mentioned by someone who wrote to BONGO comics concerning the upcoming 167th episode. The reader pointed out that the Flintstones started to go downhill when the Great Gazoo showed up in the last few seasons. The reader sarcastically pointed out The Simpsons will no longer be worth watching [when] a Gazoo-like being (Ozmodiar) appeared. >> Good Heavens! I've created Lutheran TV! Tom Restivo writes: "Davey and Goliath" was created by Art Clokey, the same guy who brought you "Gumby," and produced by the Lutherans. (Yep, many a non-Lutheran Christian would go to church, hear "A Mighty Fortress" by Martin Luther, and think it's the D&G theme). (Episodes of this classic series can now be purchased from The Program Source International. P.O. Box 444, Bloomfield Hills, MI 48303.) In September 1998, "The Lutheran" news magazine reported that a new digital 3-D animation version of D&G was in the works. (http://www.thelutheran.org/9809/page41.html) BTW, Lutherans don't usually advocate firebombing women's health centers. They just have a penchant for hammering theses on church doors. :/ So, what was the show about? Daniel Dreibelbis explains: "Gravey and Jobriath" is a parody of this 1960s syndicated Christian claymation show that featured Davey, a boy always getting in trouble and learning a moral lesson at the end, and Goliath, a talking dog who was the voice of reason despite his dopey voice. >> Classic cartoon commercials Joe Klemm has some surprising news: Back in the 1960's, TV personalities were usually pitching products during the commercials, and the Flintstones were no exception. As usual, Fred and gang would pitch vitamins and cereal. However, along with the usual stuff, they also promoted cigarettes, which was still legal at the time. Since the show was originally meant for adults (on prime time) and smoking was yet to proven hazardous, it was okay then, but by today's standards, the ads would like Joe Camel. Luckily, they dropped the cigarette ads when Pebbles was introduced. One of these ads can be found at www.tvparty.com. Daniel Dreibelbis adds: The Itchy and Scratchy Laramie cigarette commercial isn't that far-fetched: when The Flintstones first aired in prime time they were sponsored by Winston Cigarettes, the show's "brought to you by" end had Fred lighting a cigarette for Wilma, and there was even a commercial for Winston that had Fred and Barney taking a cigarette break while goofing off from doing chores (this latter commercial has popped up in a number of video compilations and on at least one CD-ROM.). >> Hey, you're ripping off Jackie Gleason Not a shocking accusation, according to Daniel L. Dreibelbis: Regarding the voice work bit, it's well known that the Flintstones were based on characters from Jackie Gleason's THE HONEYMOONERS, with Fred as Ralph Kramden (Gleason's character) and Barney was Ed Norton (Art Carney's character). The voices were even similar. >> Capture your hilarious motions now! Benjamin Robinson explains how: Motion capture machines like the one Homer demonstrated exist. Sensors in a special suit track the movements of the wearer, and a computer (or, probably, a set of computers) uses this input to manipulate a cartoon alter-ego. This can be done in real-time, and the technique is sometimes used to create animated characters for children's shows and advertising, where the traditional method of painstakingly computer-animating the scene from scratch would be too expensive. By the way, a similar machine is used to capture movements for videogames and movies. This one uses white spots on the wearer's joints and an optical camera to store movement, and then play it back later. "Titanic" made heavy use of this to quickly create realistic virtual crowds. >> Folklore Alert Haynes Lee notes that the incident where Homer wears the motion capture suit to the bathroom may have its roots in urban folklore. Haynes Lee: A Priest had just finished mass and had to go to the bathroom quite urgently. In his rush to the restroom he forgot to remove or turn off his cordless microphone. The church was filled with the sound of a flushing toilet! >> Hey, you're ripping off Daniel Keyes! Daniel Dreibelbis: A classic science fiction AND drama novel by Daniel Keyes which became a 1961 television film and later became the 1968 feature film CHARLY, both starring Cliff Robertson (who won a Best Actor Oscar in the later film). It's about what happens when Charly Gordon, a mental midget, has his intelligence boosted by a brain operation -- and how his life changes first for the better, then for the worst as his intelligence increases and his relationships with his co-workers and his social worker changes. The book is a must-read as it's written as if it were Charly's own diary, and you watch as his intelligence improves. (BTW, Algernon is a lab mouse that had the same operation Charley had, and his fate in the middle of the book foreshadows what will happen to Charley). >> Crayola vs. Genetics Adam Rivers asks: Doesn't this episode go against the Simpson gene that affects the male. Benjamin Powers answers: But the Simpsons gene episode was a lie before it began. Homer's half brother herb, from early episodes made it rich solely on ingenuity, not once but twice. Herb was a descendent from Abe, not Homer's mom. Jimmy Legs: Maybe it's something that flares up every now and then. For instance, how much intelligence would it take Herb to know not to give Homer complete creative control for the design of that car he built? Later of course, Herb built that baby translator and regained his fortune. Homer invested that automatic hammer, too, which made the Edison descendents even richer. Homer was even right about that comet that threatened to destroy Springfield. Maybe all Homer really needs is to get Henry Kissinger's glasses back. E Kadouri: I for one think that the Simpson gene did exist and can coexist with this episode because homer was dumb enough to snort his crayon. I also feel it was always valid because Herb was not a "pure" Simpson, despite his looks. Maybe the Carnival Harlot had some recessive genes responsible for his inventiveness. Jimmy Legs replies: How is Homer any more 'pure' than Herb? Unless the Bouvier family is related to the Simpson family line (I mean before Homer & Marge of course). If it's passed through the male, then Homer and Herb have it. But something tells me it's the sort of thing that can be minimized. Abe's really old, and that accounts for a lot of his feeble- mindedness. Homer shoved crayons in his brain at an early age and has had who-knows how many head injuries since. Bart's rebellious nature makes him prone to poor judgment. Herb, perhaps raised in a more nurturing environment, escaped the worst of the gene and was able to cultivate a mind that, while often brilliant, is not immune from 'dumbening', like when he thought it would be a good idea to let Homer design a car. Dodge Huntley: The entire premise of the Simpson gene is based on the ramblings of Abe Simpson. Consider the source. For one thing, if the Simpsons gene makes you stupid, why would Abe have a detailed understanding of the genetics involved. Even if every Simpson male turned up in droves (like the women did) and proved stupid, the evidence would still be anecdotal at best. Furthermore, Bart, Homer and Abe have all demonstrated intelligence. Bart has displayed talent in military leadership and tactics on several occasions (organizing raids on Nelson, recapturing the lemon tree from Shelbyville). Abe, too, was a military man leading WWII unit in Europe. Homer has managed a country singer, toured with Lollapalooza, been an astronaut, taught adult education courses, been a safety campaigner, and about 8 million other things that require both motivation and intelligence. Failing to have common sense and focusing on grand schemes rather than applying yourself to the drudgery of your job or schoolwork is not a lack of intelligence, it's a lack of responsibility, which I will agree, both Bart and Homer lack in spades. But, responsibility is a learned attribute, and Homer definitely learned it from his mother, who was highly irresponsible, and Bart probably learned it from Homer. Abe is just an old man who no longer has a reason to care. To sum up, the Simpsons gene can easily be worked into the continuity by writing it off as the ramblings of an old, bitter man. On the other hand, cartoons don't have to be real. >> A joke that's good as Gould Mike Barloewen writes: I've come to realize that [Homer's listening to the high-brow radio station] is a two part joke, first its obviously a crack at Homer since he is now smart enough to appreciate high brow humor. But, secondly I believe this a crack at KCRW, the radio station in LA that is on 89.9. KCRW is a very popular (Especially with artsy high brow people) public radio station here in LA. I know that the Simpsons team lives in LA. I figure that the station is on 89.9 intentionally as a joke about how un-mainstream the station is and how it caters to the type of person that Homer has become. >> Mental Giants Benjamin Robinson: Rick Dees is a radio DJ of some fame. He briefly had a late-night talk show during the Late Night Talk Show Host Fad, and he (or at least his voice) appeared on Fox's own "Married ... with Children." According to the Simpsons Archive FAQ, Spalding Gray is "a monologist and actor [...] whose humor is also considered subtle, poignant, and yes, generally irritating to Republicans." Before it permanently became Evergreen Terrace, the Simpsons' home address was once given as 430 Spalding Way. >> Not as dumb as he looks Ian Boothby doesn't think Homer was stupid in the first place: I think Homer isn't a stupid man but just has no attention span (like most TV watching folk). When he focuses on something he excels at it (bowling, softball, golf, mountain climbing etc.). You could say this is what the Simpson gene is all about. Homer can do anything he sets his mind to. Without the ability to hold focus for more than a few days (or an episode) on any activity you'll never be more than a flash in the pan success then doomed to failure. When the crayon was removed Homer thought he'd be smart and since he focused on that, he was. When it went back in he was a dumb as he wanted to be again. In a similar vein is this post, by Robert Good by way of Zap Ophelia: Tonight's Simpson cartoon (crayonhead) was funny, but based on a false premise. Mr. Simpson is not unintelligent. He just has no common sense. Neither is Mr. Simpson ignorant. He's a fount of trivial knowledge, but only on subjects of no practical use to him -- i.e., he can read Chinese and knows the names of all the ayatollahs. He's not lazy either. He'll save energy whenever possible, to the point where when he's lying on a hammock he wishes he could avoid the effort of breathing. However, when he sets sight on his outrageous schemes, he puts an enormous amount of effort into them. His ambition is unrestrained. That's the problem. He's willfully blind (and deaf) to whatever might detract from his ideas. He ignores considerations the rest of us would consider obvious, but that's because of his ridiculous optimism. However, it may be that tonight's episode was correct, albeit related in the wrong terms. The injury to Mr. Simpson approximated the accidental frontal lobotomy Thomas Gage [Actually, Phineas Gage; see below -- Ed.] got, and Simpson's subsequent behavior is not unlike that reported of Gage -- flighty, inattentive of day-to-day living, unrealistic, given to wildly optimistic schemes. >> 19th Century Lobotomies Speaking of the unfortunate Mr. Gage, Haynes Lee writes: Phineas Gage is one of the most famous head injury cases. In 1848 the railroad worker had an accidental explosion [which] blew a one inch tamping rod through his skull, destroying most of his left frontal lobe. He was saved by a skillful surgeon and made a full physical recovery. But his personality did not. Once quiet, respectful, and mentally well-balanced, he became gross, profane, and vulgar. >> If the Devil is in the details, why not God? Joe Green: The scene where Homer accidentally proves God doesn't exist while trying to work out a flat tax may have been inspired by various people who have claimed to be trying to mathematically prove the existence of a supreme being by analyzing mundane statistics like the stock market, baseball scores, etc. >> Trailer Fun Mike Reed transcribes the two distinct ads for this episode: I: Announcer: Homer becomes a guinea pig! Homer: Aren't those experiments dangerous? Barney: Well, there are a few side-effects. Moe: Are those ears?! Barney: Not so loud! Lab guy: You really have no desire to eat that food? Homer: Food? I'm blind! II: (from 9F17 -- clips of Homer getting hit on the head are shown) Announcer: For years Homer Simpson has set the standard for idiotic behavior. Now, find out why! Homer: There's a crayon in my brain? (he points to his heart, and the nurse quickly moves his arm up to the real location; Homer then does Rubix cube after Rubix cube on the couch) >> Miscellaneous, Etc. The Haynes Lee alterna-title for this episode is: American Earwax Paul Melnyk suggests: They Saved Father's Little HOMR Joe Klemm: Homer is supposed to be a genius, yet a 105 IQ is a normal IQ. [In fact, 100 is considered exactly average -- Ed.] E Kadouri: It's funny, you can only see "Futurama" stuff on "The Simpsons" nowadays. ============================================================================== > Quotes and Scene Summary {bjr} ============================================================================== % America's favorite animated family recursively decides to go to an % animation festival. Inside the convention hall, the festival booths % fill the display area. The Simpsons walk around, impressed with % what they see. Homer: Animation is so great! It's way better than ... whatever the alternative is. Marge: Seems like animated shows are everywhere; or were, last year. -- OFF comments on the state of animation, "HOMR" % Bart is attracted by a monitor showing "Transformazoids," an example % of animé (or "Japanimation," which is the term he uses). A samurai % and a women, Princess Tempura, are having a sword fight. Suddenly, % the samurai transforms into Meganaut, robot styled to look like a % cross between Optimus Prime and a wolf. He shoots an energy web at % her, which traps the princess. That doesn't hold her for long. % Activating her "prawn power", metallic armor clicks into place over % the lower half of her body, looking a bit like a robo-prawn. She % uses her fan-like tail to cut her way out of Meganaut's web, and % then knock her opponent into the next prefecture. Meganaut % transforms himself into one of those novelty pair of windup % sneakers, and flees from the battle scene. Princess Tempura's tail % turns into a helicopter blade, and she flies off into the sunrise -- % which looks a lot like the wartime "rising sun" symbol. % % Lisa takes the cartoon a bit too literally. Lisa: Wait, I'm confused; why was a wolf shooting a web? Bart: Cartoons don't have to make sense. [Ozmodiar pops into being] Ozmodiar: He's right, you know. -- "HOMR" % Ned Flanders, surprisingly, has found a cartoon that he can permit % his children to watch. After all, "Gravey and Jobriath" is approved % by the Council of Presbylutheran Ministers. % % As we watch the cartoon, the animation style shifts to a dead ringer % for the original "Davey and Goliath" Claymation. Jobriath walks up % to Gravey, who's busy making something in the garage workshop. Jobriath: Whatcha making there, Gravey? Gravey: It's a pipe bomb, Jobriath. For to blow up Planned Parenthood. Jobriath: I don't know, Gravey. Gravey: I'm sick of your lack of faith. [lights the bomb and jams it into Jobriath's mouth] Jobriath: [muffled] But Gravey! [cut back to the "Simpsons" animation style, and to the Flanders flock. An explosion is heard] Rod + Todd: Yay! -- "HOMR" % A voice-over artist demonstrates how he created the voices for some % of his signature characters, but his audience points out their not- % to-coincidental similarity to existing voices. % % Elsewhere, Homer and Marge watch a classic "Itchy & Scratchy" % cartoon. This one is so old, it's in black-and-white. Itchy and % Scratchy are on a secluded beach. Scratchy is wearing a wig, and % the two are kissing. As the tide rolls in, Itchy sneaks off and % puts a shark into Scratchy's arms. The cat is almost immediately % mauled. A clapper board appears, and the scene is stopped. Director: And, cut. [Itchy puts on a robe and goes to relax on a directors' chair] Announcer: After a tough day on the set, how do Itchy and Scratchy relax? Itchy: [hops up onto a director's chair with "ITCHY" written on it] With Laramie Extra-Tar cigarettes. [a butler walks into frame, holding a tray of ciggies] Louie: Here's your smoke, Mr. Itchy. Itchy: [takes one and lights up] Thank you, Louie. [Scratchy, having lost both legs and most of an arm to the shark, hauls himself up on a stool next to Itchy. He also starts to smoke a cigarette] Scratchy: And now there's more nico-glycerol. Louie: I don't know what's in 'em; I just know I can't stop smoking 'em. [all laugh, until their laughter segues into nasty coughing] [back to the audience] Homer: Wait a minute -- was that cat making out with that mouse? [menacing] 'Cause if they were ... -- "HOMR" % The Simpsons decide to catch a demonstration of motion-capture % animation. An assistant wheels a motion-capture suit, which looks % like a wetsuit studded with electronic sensors onto the stage. The % presenter asks for volunteers, and Homer responds very % enthusiastically -- before the presenter can finish asking the % question, Homer's putting on the suit. Woman: Now, when you move any part of your body, our furry friend will copy you exactly. [indicates a cartoon dog projected on a screen behind Homer. Sure enough, whenever Homer moves, the dog mirrors his action] Homer: [moves a bit tentatively at first to test things out, then acts with more confidence] [sings] I'm a little teapot, short and stout, here is my handle and here is my spout. [does the "little teapot" miming] [sits down onstage and scratches an itch behind his ear with his foot, like a dog. The audience, including the rest of the Simpsons, laughs] Uh, let me see. [Brando imitation] I'm going to make you an offer you can't refuse. [Edith Ann] And that's the truth. [raspberry] [dances around] Bart: [laughs] That dog's a riot! Homer: Thank you! Don't spay or neuter your pets. Good-night! [waves and walks offstage, still wearing the suit. Homer walks into the bathroom, steps up to the urinal, and does his business. The dog on the motion capture screen imitates this, as well] Zip-a-rooni ... oh, yeah. Urinal cake eroding ... eroding ... eroding ... gone! [audience cheers wildly. The rest of the family looks embarrassed] -- Homer's a big hit as a cartoon character, "HOMR" % At the plant, Homer continues to extol the virtues of motion-capture % animation. He jumps up on a cafeteria table, imitates a jockey, and % asks Lenny and Carl how great that would be if a cartoon possum were % doing something like that. Their positive reaction convinces Homer % that now is the time to invest in the Animotion company, and he runs % out of the cafeteria. After he leaves, Carl turns to Lenny and % asks, "So, does he still work here, or what?" % % Homer gathers up some capital to invest. Homer: I'd like to withdraw my life's savings, please. Teller: [looks at the withdrawal slip] Uh, sir, this is a joint account. You'll need your wife's signature, too. Homer: Oh, yes, of course. She's, uh, behind that plant. [indicates a large potted plant, and runs up to it] Hello, Marge. [ducks behind plant and imitates Marge] Hi, Homey. [as himself] Sign this, please. [as Marge] You're the boss. [as Lisa] Daddy, ask the man for some candy. [as himself] Now, now, no candy for you. [as Lisa] Well, at least get some candy for yourself. [walks back to the teller] Heh, heh, heh, kids. Teller: [sighs and drops a fistful of candy into Homer's hands] Here's your candy. Homer: So long, sucker! [runs away] Teller: Uh, sir? Your life savings? [holds up some bills] Homer: [trying to be nonchalant] Ah, yes, I see that it's in bill form. Excellent. -- "HOMR" % Homer buys 500 shares of Animotion, Inc., after assuring the % stockbroker he understands the risks of the stock market. (The % broker might have been a bit less assured if he knew Homer figured % the stock market involved King Kong dancing in a Broadway revue.) % % Homer calls in to check the value of his stock. Quoter: [on phone; synthetic voice] For automated stock prices, please state the company name. Homer: Animotion. Quoter: Animotion: Up one and one-half. Homer: Yahoo! Quoter: Yahoo: Up six and a quarter. Homer: Huh? What is this crap? Quoter: Fox Broadcasting: Down eight. [Homer smiles] -- "HOMR" % Homer loves this company so much, he even takes his certificate to % bed. The relationship takes a turn for the worse when Homer watches % the night's business report on TV. Animotion stock plunges 78 % points, and the company declares super-duper bankruptcy. Homer, who % was the sole stockholder, loses virtually the entire investment. % % Later, Homer rings a cowbell in the dining room. Homer: Family meeting! Family meeting! [the rest of the family runs into the dining room and quickly takes their seats] Okay, people, let's keep this short. We all want to get home to our families. [all laugh] All right, first item: I lost our life savings in the stock market. Now let's move on to the real issue: Lisa's hogging of the maple syrup. Lisa: Well, maybe if Mom didn't make such dry waffles. There, I said it. Marge: Well, maybe if you'd eat some meat you'd have a natural lubricant. [gasps, and turns to Homer] You lost all our money? Homer: Point of order -- I didn't lose *all* the money. There was enough left for this cowbell. [rings it softly, and the bell breaks apart in his hands] Damn you, eBay! -- "HOMR" % [End of Act One. Time: 7:38] % % Homer and Marge sit in bed that night, trying to figure out how to % recover from the sudden financial blow. Homer: I have a great way to solve our money woes. You rent your womb to a rich childless couple. If you agree, signify by getting indignant. Marge: Are you crazy? I'm not going to be a surrogate mother. Homer: C'mon, Marge, we're a team. It's uter-US, not uter-YOU. Marge: Forget it! -- Not a team player, evidently, "HOMR" % At Moe's tavern, Barney tells Homer that he can earn money by % serving as a test subject for scientific experiments. He claims the % research isn't dangerous, although there could be some side effects % -- like the five working ears growing out of his chest. % % Homer is desperate, so he signs up for duty at the Screaming Monkey % Medical Research Center. For the first test, a scientist spritzes % some perfume on his arm. The liquid immediately burns his arm. The % research time decides to make the best of things and call it "Desert % Breeze." % % Next, Homer sits at a conveyer belt. The belt carries a tempting % array of food items past Homer, who passively lets them go by. A % team of scientists watches from behind a glass partition. Scientist 1: That appetite suppressant is amazing. Scientist 2: [via intercom] Homer, you really have no desire to eat that food? Homer: Food? I'm blind! [screams and runs wildly around the room] Scientist 1: Who's going to buy a pill that makes you blind? Scientist 2: We'll let marketing worry about that. [Homer runs into the glass partition, and falls down] -- "HOMR" % Homer recovers enough for a third experiment. He sits at a table % with three buttons on it. When one of the buttons lights up, he's % supposed to push it. Unfortunately, a lab rat beats him to it every % time. The strange thing is, the rat isn't even part of the % experiment. Homer has apparently brought it in with him. % % The scientists muse for a bit about the cause of Homer's stupidity. % One of them casually looks at Homer's head X-ray and notices % something unusual. Zooming in, they make a startling discovery ... Scientist 2: Mr. Simpson, I'm afraid you have a crayon lodged in your brain. Homer: There's a crayon in my brain? [points to his chest. The scientist relocates Homer's hand to his head] But I've had thousands of head X-rays. How come no one ever noticed this before? Hibbert: Oh, I can answer that. You see, whenever I picked up an X-ray, I'd always hold it like this. [picks up Homer's X-ray photo to demonstrate. His thumb falls right where the crayon would be] My thumb must've covered up the crayon every time. [chuckles] I'll show myself out. [leaves] -- There's a reasonable explanation for everything, "HOMR" % The woman scientist asks Homer how he got a crayon in his noggin. % He isn't sure, but suspects it may have had to do with an incident % from childhood. % % Flashback to young Homer at home, with a box of crayons. Homer: [sticks a crayon up his nose] Fourteen. [and another one] Fifteen. [and another one, which is a bit of a struggle] Sixteen! Woo hoo! [pause] Oh, I don't feel so good. [sneezes, expelling many of the crayons] Eh, I *think* that's all of them. -- "HOMR" % Now the scientists are convinced the crayon may be the cause of % Homer's stupidity. If they remove it, they'll either increase his % brainpower, or possibly just kill him. Homer, mixes the two % outcomes to, "increase my killing power," and decides to have the % operation. % % Later that night, Homer comes home, wearing a powder blue pullover % sweater. Marge: Oh, Homer, where have you been? Homer: I just underwent a procedure to increase my IQ fifty points. Marge: Really? Homer: And they gave me this spiffy nerd ensemble, too. Marge: You feel smarter? Homer: Is the capital of North Dakota Bismarck? [Marge, Maggie, and Bart look expectantly at Lisa] Lisa: [pause] It is. Bart: I don't believe it. Say something else smart. Homer: Dr. Joyce Brothers may be highly known, but her psychological credentials are highly suspect. [and the family looks at Lisa, again] Lisa: It's true! -- "HOMR" % Homer asks if anyone feels like going for a trip to the library % tomorrow, noting that he now pronounces "library" and "tomorrow" % correctly. Lisa accepts the invitation. % % The trip to the library is a dream come true for Lisa, who has % always hoped her father would someday be her library buddy. She % points out that even Cletus has come to check out a book (albeit % just to try cracking open a turtle). After the library trip, Homer % listens to piano sonatas on the radio while solving a basket of % Rubik's Cube puzzles. % % That Sunday, Homer meets Ned as the latter leaves for church. Homer: Hey, Flanders, heading for church? Well, I thought I could save you a little time. Ned: Oooh, found a new shortcut. Homer: Better. I was working on a flat tax proposal and I accidentally proved there's no God. [shows Flanders a sheet of paper with complex figuring on it] Ned: [flustered] We'll just see about that. [reads the paper] Uh-oh. Well, maybe he made a mistake. [checks it again] Nope, it's airtight. Can't let this little doozy get out. [uses a lighter to burn the "proof"] [in the background, Homer puts more copies of his no-God paper on the windshields of nearby cars] -- "HOMR" % Homer is invited to give a lecture at Springfield Elementary. Skinner: Welcome to the third in our series of lectures on, "Not putting things up your nose." Please welcome Homer Simpson. [students clap politely] Homer: I am here to give hope to the least of you, because we all have a crayon up our nose. Maybe it's not a crayon made of wax. Maybe it's a crayon made of prejudice. Nelson: [raises hand] Question! Homer: Yes, Nelson. Nelson: A moron says what? Homer: Not being a moron, I wouldn't know. However, [mumbles something unintelligibly] Nelson: What? Homer: Ladies and gentlemen, I give you your moron. [Nelson groans. The class points at him and yells, "HA-ha!"] -- Zing! "HOMR" % Homer encourages the children to use their brains and do something % creative like paint, sing, or dance. If the students want to follow % that advice, they'll have to do it somewhere else; due to budget % cuts the creative arts classes are cancelled, and the auditorium is % to become a mini-mall. Everyone flees from the building just ahead % of the bulldozers. % % At the nuclear plant, Carl and Lenny are engaged in some pleasant % chit-chat when Homer comes by to mail a package. Lenny: Whatcha mailing, Homer? Homer: I've compiled a thorough safety report on this plant. Carl: How come you're not giving it to Mr. Burns? Homer: I've decided to disintermediate the local authorities and send it straight to the Nuclear Regulatory Commission. Lenny: Yeah, and just in time. Every day there's more skin on my pillow. [scratches his cheek, and alarmingly large flakes of skin fall off] Carl: Yeah, it's nice to have someone with brains in this nuclear power plant. Homer's the guy who rigged up my pants with this special codpiece. [camera pans down to reveal a multi-colored codpiece strapped to Carl's slacks] Homer: Comfy, isn't it? Carl: Oh, yeah. It provides the freedom, and protection, I so sorely need. Homer: Yeah! [Homer and Carl high five-each other, then Homer drops the package in the mail slot] -- "HOMR" % Soon afterward, Burns convenes a meeting in front of the plant. He % announces that the plant will be shut down while it is brought in % compliance with safety regulations. In the meantime, he casually % announces, everyone is laid off. % % The employees don't take this well. Carl yells at Homer, saying "I % can't feed my family with a codpiece," before throwing said item of % clothing at Homer's feet. The crowd disperses, abandoning Homer in % the plant parking lot. Homer: [yelling after the crowd] Wait, you can't hate me. I'm your better! YOUR BET-TER! [Ozmodiar materializes] Ozmodiar: Oh, you've really done it this time, dum-dum. -- "HOMR" % [End of Act Two. Time: 15:20] % % Homer drops by Moe's Tavern, where he finds that a crowd of angry % bar patrons is burning an effigy. Homer: Effigy, eh? Yeah, nothing burns like an effigy. [notices the effigy is of him] Hey, that's me! Stop that! The fire inspector would be appalled. Inspector: Don't tell me how to feel. [throws a mug of beer at the effigy] Homer: So, you all hate me? Lenny: That's right, brainiac. You cost us our jobs -- which we need for working. Carl: Not to mention driving to. Moe: And I was a lot happier before I knew Dame Edna was a man. A *lot* happier. Lenny: You ain't welcome here no more, smart boy. Homer: Hmm. I'm detecting a distinct strain of anti- intellectualism in this tavern. [someone knocks him out with a 2-by-4] Moe: Power off, Einstein. -- "HOMR" % Homer retreats to the safety of Lisa's room, where she explains to % him that as intelligence rises, happiness decreases. She even made % a graph of this phenomenon. ("I make a lot of graphs," she admits.) % She tells Homer that a long walk can often help in dealing with the % sadness. Homer takes this advice -- sort of. He drives around % town, ending up at the Aztec Theater, where Julia Roberts's "Love is % Nice" is playing. % % The movie is ... let's just say it's not something you'd mistake for % a Bergman film. As Homer walks in, a priest is performing a % marriage ceremony between Julia and her suitor. Priest: Do you take this woman to be your lawfully wedded wife? Groom 1: [simultaneously with Groom 2] I do. Groom 2: [simultaneously with Groom 1] I do. Priest: [points to one] One groom? [points to other] Two grooms? But he ... but you can't ... oh, my medication. [faints, and falls into the wedding cake] Boy: Radical! Wed. Usher: Is that your final answer? [audience laughs] Homer: I don't understand; that wasn't funny. Patty: Wait a minute. Somebody's not laughing here. [points to Homer] It's him! Homer: Hey, don't blame me, this movie is tired and predictable. You know she's going to wind up marrying Richard Gere. [audience gasps in surprise] Hibbert: I thought she was going to wind up with that rich snob. McAllister: Ably played by Bill Paxton. Homer: That's Bill *Pullman*, you fool! [someone knocks Homer out with a 2-by-4] [cut to the front of the movie theater, as Homer is shown the door] Mov. Usher: Point out your plot holes elsewhere. Homer: [to the heavens] Is there no place for the man with the 105 IQ? -- Why smart people rent videos, instead, "HOMR" % Homer takes a walk through town, where the neon signs suggest that % there is indeed no place for such a man. Fed up, Homer goes to the % medical research center. Homer: I'm a Spalding Gray in a Rick Dees world. Change me back to the blissful boob I was. Scientist 1: I'm sorry; we don't play God here. Homer: That's ridiculous. You do nothing but play God, and I think your octo-parrot would agree. [points to a creature with the body and head of a parrot, but with tentacles instead of wings and legs] Polly: Awk! Polly shouldn't be! -- "HOMR" % As a compromise, one of the scientists offers Homer the name of an % unlicensed surgeon who can restore Homer's old self. He takes a % business card, and is surprised to learn that the surgeon is Moe % Szyslak. % % Moe apparently has no reluctance to play God. He straps Homer to % the operating table (which is his pool table when not serving as a % medical device). Moe: So what do you want here, uh, appendectomy, lipo, or ... the sampler. That's very popular. Homer: [holds up a blue crayon] I want you to stick this crayon into my brain. Moe: No problem -- the ol' Crayola oblongata. -- "HOMR" % Meanwhile, Lisa draws a picture of her father as a Renaissance-era % intellectual. She reaches for the powder blue crayon, finds that % it's missing, and realizes what has happened to it. % % Back at Moe's Tavern, Moe begins to put the crayon in Homer's nose. Moe: All right, tell me when I hit the sweet spot. Homer: Deeper, you pusillanimous pilsner pusher! Moe: All right, all right. [with a small hammer and chisel, taps the crayon further up Homer's nose] Homer: De-fense! [woof-woof] De-fense! [woof-woof] Moe: Eh, that's pretty dumb. But, uh ... [taps once more] Homer: Extended warranty? How can I lose? Moe: Perfect. -- "HOMR" % Marge tries to reassure Lisa. Marge: Sweetheart, the missing crayon could be anywhere. [Homer crashes through the living-room window] Homer: Who wants lottery tickets. [holds up two fistfuls of tickets] Marge: [resigned] Okay, it's in his brain. [leaves] Lisa: Dad, how could you? We were connecting in such a meaningful way. Homer: We were what-what in a what-what? Lisa: [sighs] Homer: Yeah, which reminds me: I need a sandwich. [turns to go get one. A note addressed to Lisa falls to the floor] Lisa: Hey, what's this? Homer: I dunno. Must be something I wrote before Moe fixed me. [leaves] Lisa: [reads] Lisa: I'm taking the coward's way out. But before I do, I just wanted to say being smart made me appreciate just how amazing you really are. [Homer returns. Lisa runs to him, arms outstretched] Oh, Dad. Homer: Huh? [holds his sandwich closer to him, protectively] Oh, you want a hug. Well, that I know how to do. [hugs Lisa, then takes a bite of his sandwich] Mmmm ... hug. -- "HOMR" % [End of Act Three. Time: 20:10] % % Normal closing credits and Gracie Noise. ============================================================================== > Contributors ============================================================================== {ag2} Alex Gilblom {ah} Alan Hamilton {al} Andrew Levine {am} Alie Molino {bjr} Benjamin Robinson {cj} Carl Johnson {cl} Chad Lehman {ddg} Don Del Grande {dj} Darrel Jones {ek} E Kadouri {hl} Haynes Lee {jc} Jeff Cross {jg2} Joe Green {jj} John Jensen {jk} Joe Klemm {jk2} Jennifer Kremer {jl} Jimmy Legs {rm} Ryan Mead {rsw} Raymond S. Wise {tr2} Tom Restivo {vbd} V B. Drummer ============================================================================== > Legal Mumbo Jumbo ============================================================================== This episode capsule is Copyright 2003 Benjamin Robinson. It is not to be redistributed in a public forum without consent from its author or current maintainer (capsules@snpp.com). All quoted material and episode summaries remain property of The Simpsons, Copyright of Twentieth Century Fox. All other contributions remain the properties of their respective authors. The Quote and Scene Summary itself is Copyright 2002 Benjamin Robinson. This capsule has been brought to you by I. P. O. Friday's. This work is dedicated to Raymond Chen, James A. Cherry, Ricardo Lafaurie, Frederic Briere, and all of those who made episode capsules what they are today.